I am the milk man.....

[rangereric38]

North Carolina.

A married woman I did business with pursued me and we ended up having a three year affair. She became pregnant within the first three months. She did't want to create stress on the developing baby, so she was to remain in her married life until the child was born and then we'd be together. Well, that didn't happen. It was also "when I get to this point or that point" Fast forward some 3.5 years later. Her husband presumably thinks the girl is his, but I have my doubts. Last she told me was, even if he knew, he loves her and would keep her. But so do I. I never interfered legally as to protect her life. She is a well known business women. Promises made in the dark I know. We broke up and were sort of friends, she was agreeing she would sneak her to me to see her when I wanted, but then it blew up. She says I am never going to see my daughter and never to contact her again.

What legal right do I have? Here is the kicker, I am also married, but more so now, just legally. I remained married to protect myself. I was told this offered me many layers of protection. Yeah, I know this poor other guy, but he's no angel himself and his wife is a you know what and he has to know. Big time woman who intermixes business with personal crap and develops these "friendships" with countless men. She's hot, former model, so before you judge, most any of you guys on her would have fallen for her.

If I have no real right, to see her, how do I protect myself from this witch and her weird husband? I was thinking to draw up an agreement via a lawyer and have at least her sign?

 

[LdiJ]

North Carolina.

A married woman I did business with pursued me and we ended up having a three year affair. She became pregnant within the first three months. She did't want to create stress on the developing baby, so she was to remain in her married life until the child was born and then we'd be together. Well, that didn't happen. It was also "when I get to this point or that point" Fast forward some 3.5 years later. Her husband presumably thinks the girl is his, but I have my doubts. Last she told me was, even if he knew, he loves her and would keep her. But so do I. I never interfered legally as to protect her life. She is a well known business women. Promises made in the dark I know. We broke up and were sort of friends, she was agreeing she would sneak her to me to see her when I wanted, but then it blew up. She says I am never going to see my daughter and never to contact her again.

What legal right do I have? Here is the kicker, I am also married, but more so now, just legally. I remained married to protect myself. I was told this offered me many layers of protection. Yeah, I know this poor other guy, but he's no angel himself and his wife is a you know what and he has to know. Big time woman who intermixes business with personal crap and develops these "friendships" with countless men. She's hot, former model, so before you just, most any of you guys on her would have fallen for her.

If I have no real right, to see her, how do I protect myself from this witch and her weird husband? I was thinking to draw up an agreement via a lawyer and have at least her sign?

There is no way to protect anyone other than to file to establish paternity, joint custody and parenting time. Doing it sooner rather than later would be best for the child. It will be less traumatic for her to find out now than to find out when she is an adolescent or teenager.

If you don't end up being the father, then you will know for sure.

 

[rangereric38]

There is no way to protect anyone other than to file to establish paternity, joint custody and parenting time. Doing it sooner rather than later would be best for the child. It will be less traumatic for her to find out now than to find out when she is an adolescent or teenager.

If you don't end up being the father, then you will know for sure.

I 1000% know I am the father, that is not the issue. I tested DNA her myself.

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

At this point in time, the husband of the mother is the legal father of the child. The longer you wait, the less chance there is that a court will change that. You should contact a NC lawyer experienced in paternity cases. There are many states that would bar you from even claiming paternity but I can't find NC law on the issue but that doesn't mean it isn't there.

 

[rangereric38]

At this point in time, the husband of the mother is the legal father of the child. The longer you wait, the less chance there is that a court will change that. You should contact a NC lawyer experienced in paternity cases. There are many states that would bar you from even claiming paternity but I can't find NC law on the issue but that doesn't mean it isn't there.

In NC, I believe you can challenge paternity until the child is literally 18.

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

I didn't say you couldn't though I could find no such law. What I said was "The longer you wait, the less chance there is that a court will change that."

 

[Just Blue]

Px Hx.

 

[rangereric38]

Px Hx.

Not following this?

 

[Just Blue]

Not following this?

Px Hx= Posting History.

 

[LdiJ]

Not following this?

What he means is that the older the child gets, the more traumatic it would be for the child to find out that the person who she believes is her father is not her biological father, and the more difficult it would be for the child to bond with another father, therefore the less likely that a judge would allow a paternity case to proceed.

 

[justalayman]

Ldij’s post rephrased:

A court can refuse to remove the husband as the father if they determine it is in the best interest of the child. The older the child is, the more likely the best interest of the child is to not be subjected to a change in legal paternity

 

[LdiJ]

Ldij’s post rephrased:

A court can refuse to remove the husband as the father if they determine it is in the best interest of the child. The older the child is, the more likely the best interest of the child is to not be subjected to a change in legal paternity

Your wording was definitely less convoluted than mine.

 

[Just Blue]

What he means is that the older the child gets, the more traumatic it would be for the child to find out that the person who she believes is her father is not her biological father, and the more difficult it would be for the child to bond with another father, therefore the less likely that a judge would allow a paternity case to proceed.

If you weren't such a childish person you would know OP was quoting my post.

 

[Just Blue]

Ldij’s post rephrased:

A court can refuse to remove the husband as the father if they determine it is in the best interest of the child. The older the child is, the more likely the best interest of the child is to not be subjected to a change in legal paternity

Except that LD's post had nothing to do with what OP quoted and questioned.

 

[justalayman]

Except that LD's post had nothing to do with what OP quoted and questioned.

Granted but it is pertinent information that was being discussed. I think we have all quoted a post and made a statement where that connnection made no sense. I don’t see that as a reason to make much of an issue if,the post does appear to be relevant to the discussion.