Is this acceptable parenting

[Just Blue]

So she is able to drop a kid off by himself vs stay at her home while she sleeps until the dad is scheduled to pick him up.

You are dating a still married father...if you can't handle being around his child...move on to another married man (one without children).

 

[ajkroy]

Since the OP is a teacher (which means she has a clear background check) with years of teaching and nanny experience, I would think Mom made an excellent choice for someone to watch over her child. However, no one can make OP care about Dad's kids...

 

[Just Blue]

Since the OP is a teacher (which means she has a clear background check) with years of teaching and nanny experience, I would think Mom made an excellent choice for someone to watch over her child. However, no one can make OP care about Dad's kids...

And the child in question is 14...not 3 or 4.

 

[stealth2]

I am a stranger to this mom. I am a competent adult but I am not getting paid and she feels it's acceptable to drop him off in a house instead of keeping him till the dad gets off work

Then call Dad and tell him his son is there and you are going out. Or move. Or evict Dad. Lots of options.

 

[cbg]

You've never worked nights, have you? I have.

So Mom's supposed to work her night shift, come home, stay up to supervise a 14 year old boy, and only sleep after Dad gets home from work? By which time she likely only has a matter of five or so hours before she has to be at work again?

Of course you're expecting her to stay up and supervise him. You've made a point of how irresponsible the boy is. He might as well be left alone if she's sleeping while he's at home, and you've very strongly implied that someone needs to be watching him at all times.

And you expect to be PAID for watching your boyfriend's kid? Lady, you're a real piece of work, aren't you?

 

[stealth2]

I just thought of another option. Suggest to Dad that he ask Mom to quit her night-shift job and offer to make up her lost income via an increase in support! Win-win!

 

[LdiJ]

I am not sure that we should be quite so unsympathetic to the OP. I doubt that any of us would be thrilled to have a child just dumped on us when we were not expecting to have to care for a child. She could have had plans of her own that were interrupted by that happening.

However, on the other hand it apparently has only happened once so far this summer, and we are already half way into July, therefore its not a chronic problem.

 

[Just Blue]

I am not sure that we should be quite so unsympathetic to the OP. I doubt that any of us would be thrilled to have a child just dumped on us when we were not expecting to have to care for a child. She could have had plans of her own that were interrupted by that happening.

However, on the other hand it apparently has only happened once so far this summer, and we are already half way into July, therefore its not a chronic problem.

As a teacher, I'm sure OP is aware of the word "No!".

 

[Shadowbunny]

So let's suppose for a minute that one of us actually agrees with you that this is not acceptable. Now what? If you are so unhappy with this situation, you should break up with your b/f and allow him to find someone who isn't so, well, unacceptable.

Have you taken even a nano-second to think about this poor kid? Divorce is hard enough on kids, but for his dad to not only "move on" but to move IN with another woman when still married is bound to be very, very confusing for the child. So it's no wonder he's acting out.

Try being a better human and cut the kid some slack.

 

[t74]

Have dad arrange and pay for age appropriate summer activities such as scout camp, sports camp, summer school, ...

 

[isis297]

You've never worked nights, have you? I have.

So Mom's supposed to work her night shift, come home, stay up to supervise a 14 year old boy, and only sleep after Dad gets home from work? By which time she likely only has a matter of five or so hours before she has to be at work again?

Of course you're expecting her to stay up and supervise him. You've made a point of how irresponsible the boy is. He might as well be left alone if she's sleeping while he's at home, and you've very strongly implied that someone needs to be watching him at all times.

And you expect to be PAID for watching your boyfriend's kid? Lady, you're a real piece of work, aren't you?

Let's not forget she is a nurse where people's lives depend on her being well rested, alert and thinking clearly.

 

[bcr229]

Let's not forget she is a nurse where people's lives depend on her being well rested, alert and thinking clearly.

Then she can move into her own place where she doesn't have to deal with her boyfriend's child while he works.

 

[cbg]

Then she can move into her own place where she doesn't have to deal with her boyfriend's child while he works.

It's Mom who is the nurse. OP is a teacher.

 

[isis297]

Then she can move into her own place where she doesn't have to deal with her boyfriend's child while he works.

I'm not following you. I was saying that the mom needs to be well rested because she's a nurse and lives depend on her. You would think in an effort to make for good co-parenting/step-parenting the OP would think about all of that. I really hope none of the nurses who take care of my husband or son have ex's girlfriends who feel like the OP. I count on them to keep my family safe and alive and well cared for while they are with them. I'm sure the boy's mom has patients and their families who feel the same.

 

[bcr229]

It's Mom who is the nurse. OP is a teacher.

My bad. 40 lashes with a wet noodle for me.