Does a Custody Evaluation expire?

[_HappyDad_]

Even family generally expects to be paid something. Committing to providing full time child care can be a very restricted lifestyle. Most people are unwilling to do it completely for free.

Her step-mother moved to this country a few years ago by way of marriage. In her home country, family cares for family. She did not want to be paid to watch our child while we were married. That type of thing is insulting in her home country. I'm not sure what type of deal her and my EX worked out.

I do agree that some family would want to be paid. But, her step-mother does not work at all. She just keeps the home, and she has no children of her own.

 

[_HappyDad_]

You said that child care is provided on both sides for family, and you are paying the family on your side, so its a little hypocritical of you to say "exactly" as an answer to that question.

I think we should just pay our own, and not be responsible to each other for child care. Exactly.

Do you think I should pay 100% of my child care plus 65% of hers?

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

Exactly.

While I try to steer away from trashing my EX, she is a little "off". She cannot handle not getting her way. Her own Mom came to my house after my EX moved out. Her mom went on and on about this very thing. I just sat there with my mouth shut. I was amazed. Her own Mother.

I tried two times in Court to have us each pay our own costs. But, child care is on the Child Support worksheet. And, our Judge goes by the Law, all of the time.

It may be on the worksheet but you aren't supposed to put in made-up numbers.

 

[_HappyDad_]

It may be on the worksheet but you aren't supposed to put in made-up numbers.

I know! My EX had no proof of payment for child care at any of the Hearings. I had bank-stamped copies of all my processed checks. I always bring evidence. My EX does not. That is what makes this frustrating.

 

[LdiJ]

I think we should just pay our own, and not be responsible to each other for child care. Exactly.

Do you think I should pay 100% of my child care plus 65% of hers?

You can make that proposal to the judge. You can also point out to the judge that the original order, the $700.00 per week included your share of mom's daycare. You can ask that both of your daycare's be included in a recalculation of child support or you can try convincing the judge to each let you pay your own. I think that you are going to have better luck getting both of them included in a recalculation since you apparently make more money than mom.

 

[_HappyDad_]

You can make that proposal to the judge. You can also point out to the judge that the original order, the $700.00 per week included your share of mom's daycare. You can ask that both of your daycare's be included in a recalculation of child support or you can try convincing the judge to each let you pay your own. I think that you are going to have better luck getting both of them included in a recalculation since you apparently make more money than mom.

Yes, I agree. I think it is fair if both of our costs are in the worksheet.

I have no problem paying my share.

I just don't want to pay her twice for the same thing. That is my question-- what is the correct way to do such?

 

[Zigner]

Even family generally expects to be paid something. Committing to providing full time child care can be a very restricted lifestyle. Most people are unwilling to do it completely for free.

While I agree - I also suspect that she's not really paying for child care...but how to prove it?

 

[_HappyDad_]

While I agree - I also suspect that she's not really paying for child care...but how to prove it?

Now we are exchanging processed checks from then bank. So, there is at least proof she pays her step-mother. What happens with the money after might be a different story. But, that's not my concern-- just like how how she chooses to spend child support.

My only concern is making sure the Support obligations are correct.

 

[_HappyDad_]

An update: the EX's Motion to Vacate was OVERRULED by the Judge. She did not meet the requirements for CR 59.05. No mention of Child Care payments were made.

 

[_HappyDad_]

Update:

Regarding the child support/child care costs. I continued to pay my EX the same way I have for the past two years. My EX emailed me saying I was not compliant with the Orders. I asked her to be more specific, but she only repeated the same general thing. Then my boss tells me the Child Support Office contacted him, and they said they were going to garnish my paycheck.

So, I went down the the CSO to find out what was going on. All support payments were made directly to EX for the last two years by check. I wrote one for Child Support and one for the difference in our Child Care costs. This was noted in each respective memo line. My EX told the Child Support Office that I only paid her the Child support amount for the last two years. So, they had me down for being $7500 in arrears.

My attorney assures me that I will not owe the arrears. But, the CSO filed a Motion with the Court for to determine any possible arrearages. My attorney called the CSO and told them we would get an Agreed Order worked out.

Is there any repercussions for my EX for basically lying about the amounts I paid? I have printed out copies from each and every check I wrote that showed she cashed all of them.

My EX tried to tell the Judge at Trial what I bad Dad I am. Some reasons included how I show up to all of our kiddo's events and appointments. I'm not sure how that would make me a bad Dad. But, she never said one thing about being stiffed on support. Seems like that would be the first thing she would have said if it were true.

 

[t74]

Update:

Regarding the child support/child care costs. I continued to pay my EX the same way I have for the past two years. My EX emailed me saying I was not compliant with the Orders. I asked her to be more specific, but she only repeated the same general thing. Then my boss tells me the Child Support Office contacted him, and they said they were going to garnish my paycheck.

So, I went down the the CSO to find out what was going on. All support payments were made directly to EX for the last two years by check. I wrote one for Child Support and one for the difference in our Child Care costs. This was noted in each respective memo line. My EX told the Child Support Office that I only paid her the Child support amount for the last two years. So, they had me down for being $7500 in arrears.

My attorney assures me that I will not owe the arrears. But, the CSO filed a Motion with the Court for to determine any possible arrearages. My attorney called the CSO and told them we would get an Agreed Order worked out.

Is there any repercussions for my EX for basically lying about the amounts I paid? I have printed out copies from each and every check I wrote that showed she cashed all of them.

My EX tried to tell the Judge at Trial what I bad Dad I am. Some reasons included how I show up to all of our kiddo's events and appointments. I'm not sure how that would make me a bad Dad. But, she never said one thing about being stiffed on support. Seems like that would be the first thing she would have said if it were true.

It is in your best interest to pay through the state child support office.

 

[_HappyDad_]

It is in your best interest to pay through the state child support office.

I won't disagree. I asked my attorney two years ago if I should pay through the agency, and he said not to bother with such.

Are there any repercussions for my EX being dishonest about the payments? Or, is this the type of thing that just continues to make her look even worse to the Judge? She did a good job of looking unreasonable at Trial, too.

 

[_HappyDad_]

The hearing to correct my child support order is next week. My attorney filed a straightforward Motion to resolve the issue. It was a simple clerical error, and since the EX would not come to an Agreed Order, we are seeking legal fees.

The EX countered with a motion that seeks a contempt charge against me for non-payment of Child Support. However, in September she went to the Child Support office to seek wage garnishment from me. Before this, I was paying on time, every month, for two years by check. I have documentation to prove such. The Child Support office began the wage garnishment process, but, seemingly is on hold due to our Motion to clarify the support amount. So, the EX hasn't been paid since August.

The EX's motion also included a parenting plan modification due to my work schedule. The EX incorrectly states that I don't have evening child care available in the event I need to go to work. Also, the EX states only her step-mother should watch our D3 during either of our parenting time. Previously my Mother was my child care provider, and then I switched to a nearby child care facility. The EX claims I violated Joint Legal custody by making this switch without asker her approval. My attorney assures me the EX is wrong.

Also included is the EX wants me to notify any time I travel more than 50 miles out of the area with D3. There is no mention of this in our decree. She also claims that I block her access to medical information, which is completely untrue.

I know she is having trouble dealing with the fact that she "lost" at both Trial and her appeal to get sole custody. Any thoughts on the things she filed in her Motion? It seems to me like she is trying to control me, still.

 

[Ohiogal]

This is being heard in court and not an administrative hearing correct? Do you have an attorney?

 

[stealth2]

Do you have an attorney?

Based on Post 58, yes.

My attorney assures me the EX is wrong.