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Anulment/Divorce/Custody/Alimony

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L

LonesomeDove

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Oregon

First, I want to thank you for having such a site. It's hard to get the right keywords into Google, and it's very expensive to get a lawyer.

In Oregon, what are some of the conditions for anuling a marriage? And, what is the difference between an anulment and a divorce?

I've been married to my husband 1 year since yesterday, and we have an 8 month old son. We live together currently, but I am secretly planning to leave him when our lease is up. He gave me genital warts, I'm pretty sure he knew he had them, but I can't prove it. He also has a felony conviction which I knew about before the marriage, but what I didn't know was that he still has a warrant in the state of Colorado for a misdemeanor. He lied about being a Christian before we were married. I knew he smoked pot quite a bit before we were married, but I didn't know he was addicted to it. He is abusive toward me and even gets very frustrated at our little baby, even though he hardly ever takes care of him. He looks at porn and has in the past secretly talked to women on the internet. Not like an affair, but I have found e-mails where he e-mailed women telling them they were "hot". I looked at their Yahoo profiles and found that these women live in my city. He no longer has contact with these women.

Any advice you can give me?

Also, is it true that when a parent gets a divorce/anulment, the other parent can't move to another state with the child? (In my case, I would like to get full custody of my son and eventually move back to California where my family is.) If not, what are the conditions for that?

Now, I'm really not the type of gal to "take him for everything he's got" but, since I only work 2 days a week, am I intitled to spousal support? What are some of the conditions for that?

I really appreciate any information or links you can give me. Thank you so much for making a site like this.What is the name of your state?
 


T

THE PRACTICE-30

Junior Member
LonesomeDove said:
What is the name of your state? Oregon

First, I want to thank you for having such a site. It's hard to get the right keywords into Google, and it's very expensive to get a lawyer.

In Oregon, what are some of the conditions for anuling a marriage? And, what is the difference between an anulment and a divorce?

I've been married to my husband 1 year since yesterday, and we have an 8 month old son. We live together currently, but I am secretly planning to leave him when our lease is up. He gave me genital warts, I'm pretty sure he knew he had them, but I can't prove it. He also has a felony conviction which I knew about before the marriage, but what I didn't know was that he still has a warrant in the state of Colorado for a misdemeanor. He lied about being a Christian before we were married. I knew he smoked pot quite a bit before we were married, but I didn't know he was addicted to it. He is abusive toward me and even gets very frustrated at our little baby, even though he hardly ever takes care of him. He looks at porn and has in the past secretly talked to women on the internet. Not like an affair, but I have found e-mails where he e-mailed women telling them they were "hot". I looked at their Yahoo profiles and found that these women live in my city. He no longer has contact with these women.

Any advice you can give me?

Also, is it true that when a parent gets a divorce/anulment, the other parent can't move to another state with the child? (In my case, I would like to get full custody of my son and eventually move back to California where my family is.) If not, what are the conditions for that?

Now, I'm really not the type of gal to "take him for everything he's got" but, since I only work 2 days a week, am I intitled to spousal support? What are some of the conditions for that?

I really appreciate any information or links you can give me. Thank you so much for making a site like this.What is the name of your state?
Click to expand...

My response:

Damn!!

Why couldn't this post have come from one of the Dufus States, like Georgia, Alabama, Missouri, etc.? It would have been PERFECT as a contestant for "Best Trailer Trash" story!!

Damn!

IAAL
 
L

LonesomeDove

Junior Member
THE PRACTICE-30 said:
My response:

Damn!!

Why couldn't this post have come from one of the Dufus States, like Georgia, Alabama, Missouri, etc.? It would have been PERFECT as a contestant for "Best Trailer Trash" story!!

Damn!

IAAL
Click to expand...
I think it is really terrible that you could write something so horrible about me. It is a very difficult situation I'm in, and I struggle with it everyday. I'm not trailer trash like you said. I'm good mother who wants the best for my son, and my husband is not it. He really deceived me. He pretended to be this great person, but he is a controlling, manipulative, threatening, abusive, egotistical monster that has champagne dreams on a beer man's salary who only cares about himself. You try to be the best wife you can be with a man like this and tell me if a response like yours really hurts your feelings. I came here to get advice, not ridicule. Your comments are completely out of line and offered me no support or advice. No wonder you are in this forum. Your spouse probably left you because you're so mean. Offering support and being nice really goes a long way. I'm sure if I was a mean wife, my husband would be even more horrible to me. If you can't offer advice or say something nice, don't say anything at all. Didn't your mother teach you manners? You should be ashamed of yourself.
 
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T

THE PRACTICE-30

Junior Member
LonesomeDove said:
I think it is really terrible that you could write something so horrible about me. It is a very difficult situation I'm in, and I struggle with it everyday. I'm not trailer trash like you said. I'm good mother who wants the best for my son, and my husband is not it. He really deceived me. He pretended to be this great person, but he is a controlling, manipulative, threatening, abusive, egotistical monster that has champagne dreams on a beer man's salary who only cares about himself. You try to be the best wife you can be with a man like this and tell me if a response like yours really hurts your feelings. I came here to get advice, not ridicule. Your comments are completely out of line and offered me no support or advice. No wonder you are in this forum. Your spouse probably left you because you're so mean. Offering support and being nice really goes a long way. I'm sure if I was a mean wife, my husband would be even more horrible to me. If you can't offer advice or say something nice, don't say anything at all. Didn't your mother teach you manners?
Click to expand...

My response:

Oh, my dear Lonesomedove. Believe it or not, and with what you've written, knowing what you knew both BEFORE and AFTER marriage, yes, you have elevated yourself to "Trailer Trash" stardom!

Despite the fact that your post is not from one of the typical Dufus States, your post has nonetheless been entered into the contest. Hey, who knows? Yours could be a winner!

Yes, I know it's incredible, and I know you're blushing with pride - - but, believe it or not, your post could be our Grand Prize winner for 2006! We're giving away TERRIFIC PRIZES! For further Details, Rules, and Prize list, click on this link for more information:

http://petit.philou.free.fr/

IAAL
 
T

THE PRACTICE-30

Junior Member
LonesomeDove said:
You should be ashamed of yourself.
Click to expand...

My response:

I should? Sweetheart, did you even read what you wrote? If anyone should be "ashamed" of themselves, it's you!

Re-read your post. It's terrific, typical, actions of Trailer Trash! And, what's best of all, is that it's REAL and it's YOUR life!!

Good luck in the contest. You have a lot of stiff competition.

IAAL
 
LdiJ

LdiJ

Senior Member
LonesomeDove said:
What is the name of your state? Oregon

First, I want to thank you for having such a site. It's hard to get the right keywords into Google, and it's very expensive to get a lawyer.

In Oregon, what are some of the conditions for anuling a marriage? And, what is the difference between an anulment and a divorce?

I've been married to my husband 1 year since yesterday, and we have an 8 month old son. We live together currently, but I am secretly planning to leave him when our lease is up. He gave me genital warts, I'm pretty sure he knew he had them, but I can't prove it. He also has a felony conviction which I knew about before the marriage, but what I didn't know was that he still has a warrant in the state of Colorado for a misdemeanor. He lied about being a Christian before we were married. I knew he smoked pot quite a bit before we were married, but I didn't know he was addicted to it. He is abusive toward me and even gets very frustrated at our little baby, even though he hardly ever takes care of him. He looks at porn and has in the past secretly talked to women on the internet. Not like an affair, but I have found e-mails where he e-mailed women telling them they were "hot". I looked at their Yahoo profiles and found that these women live in my city. He no longer has contact with these women.

Any advice you can give me?

Also, is it true that when a parent gets a divorce/anulment, the other parent can't move to another state with the child? (In my case, I would like to get full custody of my son and eventually move back to California where my family is.) If not, what are the conditions for that?

Now, I'm really not the type of gal to "take him for everything he's got" but, since I only work 2 days a week, am I intitled to spousal support? What are some of the conditions for that?

I really appreciate any information or links you can give me. Thank you so much for making a site like this.What is the name of your state?
Click to expand...
Ok...you made a very bad mistake and married the wrong man. I hope that you learn from this and don't repeat the cycle. That isn't intended as a slam, but unfortunately many people do tend to repeat the cycle.

You can't get an annulment....so give up that idea. You will have to divorce.

Yes, its difficult to move to another state when you have a child. You will need either the permission of dad or the permission of the courts. It may not be possible to get either. You may have to remain in Oregon if you want to have primary custody of your child. Spousal support/alimony is not a realistic possibility after such a short marriage. You are going to have to get a job to support yourself.

You are going to need an attorney. You will need to ask your family for help to hire one.
 
C

ceara19

Senior Member
rmet4nzkx said:
Happy Anniversary, you will have to get a divorce, unfortunately the man you describe is all too typical. That's why the wedding vows say to Love, Honor and Obey because you wouldn't marry if you really knew him and most women think they can change him. THings could be worse you could have an immaginaiton like this poster.
https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=310754 https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=319767
Click to expand...
I haven't heard the word "OBEY" used in marriage vows in a very very long time. I think they now use "Cherish" instead. They are taking a spouse, not a German Shepard.

OT - The spell check software (the one that keeps changing Baystategirl to *******ly), is now changing rmet4nzkx to redneck, so if I miss it and let it go unchanged, please don't take offense, it's not intentional.
 
Just Blue

Just Blue

Senior Member
ceara19 said:
I haven't heard the word "OBEY" used in marriage vows in a very very long time. I think they now use "Cherish" instead. They are taking a spouse, not a German Shepard.

OT - The spell check software (the one that keeps changing Baystategirl to *******ly), is now changing rmet4nzkx to redneck, so if I miss it and let it go unchanged, please don't take offense, it's not intentional.
Click to expand...

Hey...Why is your spell-check mad at me?...What did I do?...:(
 
C

ceara19

Senior Member
baystategirl said:
Hey...Why is your spell-check mad at me?...What did I do?...:(
Click to expand...
I have no idea. I'm beginning to think that it was designed by a smarta$$. Everytime it comes across an unknown word, it changes it to the closest insulting word it can find!
 
Just Blue

Just Blue

Senior Member
ceara19 said:
I have no idea. I'm beginning to think that it was designed by a smarta$$. Everytime it comes across an unknown word, it changes it to the closest insulting word it can find!
Click to expand...

My parents were married ...Tell that dang thing I am NOT a Bastar*...:p
 
T

THE PRACTICE-31

Junior Member
ceara19 said:
I have no idea. I'm beginning to think that it was designed by a smarta$$. Everytime it comes across an unknown word, it changes it to the closest insulting word it can find!
Click to expand...

My response:

It sounds like the software program I coded.

IAAL
 
B

Bali Hai

Senior Member
LonesomeDove said:
What is the name of your state? Oregon

First, I want to thank you for having such a site. It's hard to get the right keywords into Google, and it's very expensive to get a lawyer.

In Oregon, what are some of the conditions for anuling a marriage? And, what is the difference between an anulment and a divorce?

I've been married to my husband 1 year since yesterday, and we have an 8 month old son. We live together currently, but I am secretly planning to leave him when our lease is up. He gave me genital warts, I'm pretty sure he knew he had them, but I can't prove it. He also has a felony conviction which I knew about before the marriage, but what I didn't know was that he still has a warrant in the state of Colorado for a misdemeanor. He lied about being a Christian before we were married. I knew he smoked pot quite a bit before we were married, but I didn't know he was addicted to it. He is abusive toward me and even gets very frustrated at our little baby, even though he hardly ever takes care of him. He looks at porn and has in the past secretly talked to women on the internet. Not like an affair, but I have found e-mails where he e-mailed women telling them they were "hot". I looked at their Yahoo profiles and found that these women live in my city. He no longer has contact with these women.

Any advice you can give me?

Also, is it true that when a parent gets a divorce/anulment, the other parent can't move to another state with the child? (In my case, I would like to get full custody of my son and eventually move back to California where my family is.) If not, what are the conditions for that?

*Now, I'm really not the type of gal to "take him for everything he's got" but, since I only work 2 days a week, am I intitled to spousal support? What are some of the conditions for that?

I really appreciate any information or links you can give me. Thank you so much for making a site like this.What is the name of your state?
Click to expand...
*Since you are not that "type of gal" how come those words seem to flow so naturally from your lips??

That's entitled.

The conditions are: 1) You get yourself a full-time job. 2) Wash, wax and sell that trailer and split the proceeds. 3) We will then calculate how much you can "take him for".
 
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