Am I Wrong?

[Sandwalk]

Nowhere on this site does it say that every poster here is a lawyer, if we all were, we wouldn't be giving advice for free!
This site is for people who don't have a clue of where to even begin to solve their legal problems. It's a site to share experiences and inform each other of laws. It's a site to get you started on your search for a solution. No one here is going to solve your every legal issue just like that, because first of all, we NEVER get the whole story, second we are not lawyers. If you want a lawyer you go and get one and pay for it. If you choose to do a DIY legal case on the internet to solve your problems, you get what you get, warts and all. If you have access to this site you have just as much access to seach the internet for actual laws and lawyers to help you. This is not a site where strangers will do your homework or leg work for you.
Maybe sometimes people need to hear less "nice things" because that's the only way to get them to open their eyes to what they are doing. Since no one here gets paid to say anything, of course, you are going to hear things you don't like. Legal problems are seldom "nice". If you only expect to hear things you want to hear, get a lawyer, they'll they you whatever you want if you pay them. Why do you think they earn so much???

That may be all true....but jeez,,come on! Alot of the slams that the OP got were totally uncalled for! People come here for support and a step in the right direction....not to be treated poorly by people who think they are better(just because they know a little about law?) Of course I wouldn't go into court with the info I got on here alone,,,,and I am sure others would not do the same. But, the constant slamming by some is inappropriate and immature!

 

[Silverplum]

Nowhere on this site does it say that every poster here is a lawyer, if we all were, we wouldn't be giving advice for free!
This site is for people who don't have a clue of where to even begin to solve their legal problems. It's a site to share experiences and inform each other of laws. It's a site to get you started on your search for a solution. No one here is going to solve your every legal issue just like that, because first of all, we NEVER get the whole story, second we are not lawyers. If you want a lawyer you go and get one and pay for it. If you choose to do a DIY legal case on the internet to solve your problems, you get what you get, warts and all. If you have access to this site you have just as much access to seach the internet for actual laws and lawyers to help you. This is not a site where strangers will do your homework or leg work for you.
Maybe sometimes people need to hear less "nice things" because that's the only way to get them to open their eyes to what they are doing. Since no one here gets paid to say anything, of course, you are going to hear things you don't like. Legal problems are seldom "nice". If you only expect to hear things you want to hear, get a lawyer, they'll they you whatever you want if you pay them. Why do you think they earn so much???

I agree with everything you wrote except what I bolded, because I and many others with handy hard-won links and info (particularly within our own states) will point a poor soul to valid internet resources. Of course, much depends upon the tone of the poster, does it not?

Also, there are a couple of lawyers on board, God bless their [insert your own adjective here] hearts.

 

[stealth2]

I agree with everything you wrote except what I bolded, because I and many others with handy hard-won links and info (particularly within our own states) will point a poor soul to valid internet resources. Of course, much depends upon the tone of the poster, does it not?

A lot also depends on how frequently a particular question has been asked AND answered. I'm much more inclined to provide extra information when it's clear that a poster has done some legwork and just gotten stuck. Search engines are your friends, people. You are much more invested in your situation than any of us could possibly be - don't just sit back and expect people volunteering their time to do your work for you.

 

[Silverplum]

A lot also depends on how frequently a particular question has been asked AND answered. I'm much more inclined to provide extra information when it's clear that a poster has done some legwork and just gotten stuck. Search engines are your friends, people. You are much more invested in your situation than any of us could possibly be - don't just sit back and expect people volunteering their time to do your work for you.

Absolutely agreed. Most irritating is when the question has been asked and answered, same state even, and on the first page of the topic! (mooksap, I'm lookin' at you.)

 

[dmcgee44077]

Absolutely agreed. Most irritating is when the question has been asked and answered, same state even, and on the first page of the topic! (mooksap, I'm lookin' at you.)

WOW this is crazy i agree that if you have to make someone feel stupid for asking a question then you should get out of the forum

 

[Smarty Panties]

Its changed... court that is.
First the Bailiff at the door gives everyone a hug as you walk in.

Tea and cookies are passed around... (or coffee if you prefer)

The benches all have cushions... The judge wears pastels instead of black,

After the proceedings everyone holds hands in a big circle...

So, court has turned into an episode of Qu33r Eye? Cool!

(apparently you can't type qu88r on here)

 

[abstract99]

I only read the 1st post her cuz it is too long. The fact of the matter is that the dad is ALLOWED to have this visitation. It does not mean that he HAS TO take it. If mom thinks that it is costing her to much money to have the PRIVELIGE of having the children for more time than she is SUPPOSED to then she can simply stop taking them during these times. This will then cause dad to hire a babysitter and pay someone to watch his children. Mom is the one that is voluntarly watching the children for free. She cannot go to court and request that the child support be raised because she is voluntarly babysitting the kids. Dad got credit for when the kids are in school just like mom did. Who do you think has custody of the kids when they are in school? THE SCHOOL???? No it is the parent that has them that day.
You might think that you are providing for "everything" but if dad isn't providing for everything then I am sure that it would be a lot cheeper to get a 1 bedroom residence as opposed to the one that he has due to the kids. What about the food that the kids eat when they are in his care? What about clothes? Entertainment?
As for the stay-at-home-mom part. When your wife made the decision to be a stay-at-home-mom you made the decision to provide for her half of the support. If you guys are hurting for money then it might be time for her to go out and get a job.
I'm not trying to bash you or anything. This is the same thing that a judge will tell you. It will be pretty hard to convince a judge to reaise the child support when mom is not working, especially if she has a degree.

 

[abstract99]

Oh and BY THE WAY.... I would be absolutly extatic if my ex allowed me to watch the children during times that were not allotted for my visitation time. She has it lucky pal. A lot of people are not as fortunite.

 

[LdiJ]

I didn't think that was too rough. And I did it so that he would understand what the *Board's Position* was on steps. Of course he did have a 'tude, too.

(Not that I want to follow you around and argue w/you this morning, LdiJ! )

No, I didn't think you were too rough...it got rough after that...Your post was the reason why I told him if he had been listening instead of getting his back up he would have gotton better answers.

 

[stepmom65]

I've never had so much fun talking to a robot. My computer is a lot nicer.

I never said I didn't like the answers. If asking questions is wrong, then what is this advice forum about? Reading your insulting responses to people? I guess robots don't see anything wrong with insulting other people's intelligence that they don't even know. And I quote:

"Get over it would ya"
"What the hell ya mean"
"Look buddy"
"reality has hit you in the Face"
"sorry you don't get it"

Who the hell are you to talk to me that way? I'll pass on your advice, even if you are correct....

I think I'm finally done with you. I just thought of a million different things to do that is better than dealing with you....

ecastanedo: I'm on your side. I too am a step parent, and know and understand your story too well....I get the same treatment when I ask questions, just let the water run off your back. There are people in here with honest and valuable information. Hopefully, you will get your answers to your questions. They are right in one respect, it's your wife's and her X's battle, but you do have a right to inquire. I inquire alot myself on here, and occassion get some great feedback. I know I can't change the situation for my husband and his X, but I'm gaining valuable knowledge in how the system works, "just in case" I find myself divorced with kids....

take care,

 

[stepmom65]

I would like to know why everyone is jumping down this mans throat over a simple queston!!! You all know nothing about what he goes through or what goes on in his life when it comes to dealing with the ex!! OK OK so he is getting a $160.00 dollars for CS.... BIG WHOOP!! All the man did was ask a simple question concerning both him AND his wife!! You know when you are married that everything that happens in your household effect both of you....just because we as stepparents don't have a "say so" in things legally it still affects both of us. Asking a simple question doesn't mean that the kids are suffering because of it. They get to see their dad and I am sure they are treated very well at home!!
I say that unless those that are on this forum are willing to give advice without trying to make eveyone that asks a question feel like an idiot....go find something better to do with your time like starting a forum for " people who know the law and those who think they do"!! Lighten up.....there has got to be a forum for you all to vent your frustrations somewhere...just don't do it here!!

Very Well Said!!!!!!!

 

[J&A]

I didn't mean to offend you, whoever you are. I thought I had a valid question. Can I assume you have never dealt with a dead beat dad? I love my step children and have a child of my own. The last time I checked though, they were his daughters also. So that is where my concerns are.

With all due respect, can I assume that you have never dealt with a dead beat Dad??? The problem here I believe is that most of the women in here ARE dealing with truly dead beat Dads, not the kind of Father who sees his children AND (OMG) pays his child support, little as it may be. If your wife feels she is entitled to more child support, all she has to do is go to the court, fill out some paperwork and thats that. Keep in mind it could go either way.

 

[stealth2]

Mine's not a deadbeat. Just a butthead. But he's my kids' Dad and the guy I picked, so that's life. At least he's someone else's butthead now!

 

[J&A]

stealth2 Mine's not a deadbeat. Just a butthead. But he's my kids' Dad and the guy I picked, so that's life. At least he's someone else's butthead now!

Yes well at least you seem to always have your kids best interest in mind and the advice you give to others usually centers around the kids, not getting back at your butthead ex.

I just have some friends who's ex's don't pay a dime of child support, never will, and have no interest whatsoever of being involved in the slightest. NOW that is a dead beat. From what this guy has stated, his wife's ex is not a deadbeat in the slightest.