Birth Control

[luchettes]

What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania

My son is only fourteen. His girlfriend is also fourteen and doesn't have a very good relationship with her parents. To my dismay my son told me they have become sexually active. Although I wish this was not the case it is to late now. They are using condoms but his girlfriend wants to go to planned parenthood for oral contraceptives. They have asked me to if I would please make the appt. for her and provide transportation as her parents would "flip out" as she puts it. My question is can I get in any type of legal trouble if I do this for her. Planned parenthood said she has the right to medical treatment without her parents consent. But do I have the right to provide her with transportation? I wish they would have waited and I dont condon their behavior, but I dont want a grandchild either. Can you help?

 

[CdwJava]

If you go along with this idea, and help someone else's daughter get birth control, you may find yourself sibject to civil or criminal penalties. While SHE may have the right to get medical attention at Planned Parenthood, you likely do not have a right to aid in this. (And why P.P. can do all this without the parents' knowledge is beyond me since the local ER can't put on a bandaid without parental consent under other circumstances ... but they can prescribe birth control and conduct abortions?!?!)

Additionally, if you allow, foster, or aid two minors in committing a criminal offense (in this case, likely statutory rape), then you could face criminal charges as well.

As a parent, I would take VERY GREAT offense if you were to escort a daughter of mine to a clinic (for a medical exam) and assist her in obtaining a prescription that I was not aware of. I am pretty sure that this girl's parents would take similar offense.

- Carl

 

[stealth2]

Does your son understand the long-term ramifications if he gets her pregnant?

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

Gee Mom, he is 14. You obviously need to ground your young man, but make sure he has a supply of condoms if you are worried about him getting another 14 yr old pregnant.

I can't even believe you are asking this question.You have many options at your finger tips, and you are asking if you can take your 14 yr. old sons 14. yr. old girlfriend to get on the pill?

She has parents. I suggest you parent your son.

 

[stealth2]

I was thinking about this overnight, and I have to say that if I found out that someone had taken my daughter to get a scrip for contraceptives w/o my knowledge - there would be hell to pay. If I were this girl's mother (and you know that she will eventually find out), I would be looking to see what criminal charges could be levied at you AND your son. At the very least, I'd be trying to get restraining orders against both of you wrt my daughter.

While I would be upset about their sexual activity, I would be livid at the underhanded manner in which it was handled.

 

[You Are Guilty]

Let's not forget just how much attention to detail a 14 year old girl is going to give to taking her birth control pills daily. Yep, I definately don't see any problems there!

 

[luchettes]

Birth Control Revisited

State: Pennsylvania

Thank you for your replys. I wasn't feeling comfortable with the situation and have decided against providing transportation for my sons girlfriend.
Yes, my son is aware of the ramifications of pregnancy, I have talked to him at great length about safe sex. Of course, I spoke to him about not having sex at all, I think he is entirely to young and not at all ready for this type of responsibility. However, we all do the best we can as parents, we cant be with our children 24/7, we teach them and hope they do the right thing. I can tell him till I'm blue in the face not to have sex, I cant lock him in his room! What's been done is done. I can only continue to teach him to be responsible and safe. But I am not responsible for parenting his girlfriend. I will try to persuade her to speak with her parents, it will have to be her decision.

 

[stealth2]

Yes, my son is aware of the ramifications of pregnancy, I have talked to him at great length about safe sex.

So he understands that, should his g/f get pregnant, he will be tied to her for at least 18 years, he can pretty well forget about college because he's going to have to go to work to support his child, he can expect to deal with - most likely - spending a fraction of his time with the kid, etc? He also understands that he could find himself on the receiving end of a restraining order as well as possible criminal charges?

My son is only a year behind yours, and we have had this come to Jesus talk several times.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

State: Pennsylvania

Thank you for your replys. I wasn't feeling comfortable with the situation and have decided against providing transportation for my sons girlfriend.
Yes, my son is aware of the ramifications of pregnancy, I have talked to him at great length about safe sex. Of course, I spoke to him about not having sex at all, I think he is entirely to young and not at all ready for this type of responsibility. However, we all do the best we can as parents, we cant be with our children 24/7, we teach them and hope they do the right thing. I can tell him till I'm blue in the face not to have sex, I cant lock him in his room! What's been done is done. I can only continue to teach him to be responsible and safe. But I am not responsible for parenting his girlfriend. I will try to persuade her to speak with her parents, it will have to be her decision.

If a 14 yo or any minor can't get to planned parenthood on their own to get birth control they have no business having sex.
While you have a good relationship with your son, you need to lay down some rules. And if that doesn't work, I suggest you sit down with both of them together and tell them the same.
Tell the young lady that if she wishes to get birth control from planned parenthood that you will be happy to drive her, with her parent's written knowledge and permission and that you will be waiting for their call and until such time your son is grounded TFN.
Don't worry the "little talk" will take the wind out of their sails pretty quickly.

 

[luchettes]

He also understands that he could find himself on the receiving end of a restraining order as well as possible criminal charges?


Explain this please. He is fourteen. She is fourteen. They are both consenting. If this is true, wouldn't it work both ways. How do we know she didn't pressure him? Either way, they are both to young, but why would my son be the one facing charges?

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Considering the fact that the medical age of consent is 18 in pennsylvania, and that permission of both parents are required to receive pregnancy counseling, you would be breaking the law which opens you to civil penalties in addition to criminal prosecution.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

He also understands that he could find himself on the receiving end of a restraining order as well as possible criminal charges?


Explain this please. He is fourteen. She is fourteen. They are both consenting. If this is true, wouldn't it work both ways. How do we know she didn't pressure him? Either way, they are both to young, but why would my son be the one facing charges?

The age of consent for sex in PA is 16, thus thus there is no consent possible betwen them even if they are both under 16, guess what that makes you, now that you know about it?

 

[Happy Trails]

He also understands that he could find himself on the receiving end of a restraining order as well as possible criminal charges?


Explain this please. He is fourteen. She is fourteen. They are both consenting. If this is true, wouldn't it work both ways. How do we know she didn't pressure him? Either way, they are both to young, but why would my son be the one facing charges?

I agree with RMETZ, most of our legislators would say they are too young to be capable of giving consent.

 

[kat1963]

I would tell her parents & the two would never meet ALONE or OTHERWISE again EVER. WOULD THAT NOT BE SIMPLER???
When do they have time ALONE to do this anyway? Are you guilty of aiding and abetting minors??? Are you allowing these CHILDREN to be behind closed doors while in your home? If it was my daughter, you’d be going DOWN lady. I don't give a crap what she told you about her parents, not many 14 year olds agree with their parents anyway.
Don’t you care about your son being a father at 14 enough to put a COMPETE STOP to it?
According to your post, you are all but lighting the candles.
KAT

 

[Happy Trails]

I would tell her parents & the two would never meet ALONE or OTHERWISE again EVER. WOULD THAT NOT BE SIMPLER???
When do they have time ALONE to do this anyway? Are you guilty of aiding and abetting minors??? Are you allowing these CHILDREN to be behind closed doors while in your home? If it was my daughter, you’d be going DOWN lady. I don't give a crap what she told you about her parents, not many 14 year olds agree with their parents anyway.
Don’t you care about your son being a father at 14 enough to put a COMPETE STOP to it?
According to your post, you are all but lighting the candles.
KAT

Yeah, I bet her parents wouldn't be letting her out of their sight.

Too bad they have to complicate their life at such a young age. Instead of putting their efforts into their grades they now are trying to figure out how to have safe sex (what a distraction).