Daycare

[mpfups]

What is the name of your state? Maryland

My ex & i have joint physical/and shared custody of our 2 daughters ages 7 & 5...I am to pay her $120 a week in CS which i do...However after all this was settled in court she is now trying to take me back to court to get more money for daycare costs..Mind you this hasnt even been 3 months since our last court appearance, & she never brought this extra expense up then...I have asked her repeatedly for documentation & evidence that this expense has occurred cuz the kids tell me they arent in daycare or that they do go but not for the time periods my ex has claimed they are there...This is all due to her getting a new job that conflicts with school hours for the kids...I have not been given any info to date on any of the above information....

So my question is, if i get taken back to court how much will i be ordered to pay if anything, & do they take into consideration the CS i already pay to her....

 

[VG1013]

What is the name of your state? Maryland

My ex & i have joint physical/and shared custody of our 2 daughters ages 7 & 5...I am to pay her $120 a week in CS which i do...However after all this was settled in court she is now trying to take me back to court to get more money for daycare costs..Mind you this hasnt even been 3 months since our last court appearance, & she never brought this extra expense up then...I have asked her repeatedly for documentation & evidence that this expense has occurred cuz the kids tell me they arent in daycare or that they do go but not for the time periods my ex has claimed they are there...This is all due to her getting a new job that conflicts with school hours for the kids...I have not been given any info to date on any of the above information....

So my question is, if i get taken back to court how much will i be ordered to pay if anything, & do they take into consideration the CS i already pay to her....

~~~The court retains jurisdiction to change the order.
A child support order is not set in concrete but is subject to change should future conditions warrant. Thus, either parent may petition the court to raise or lower support should conditions warrant. CS payments are to be used to pay for the vital needs of the children, such as rent, food, and clothes. If child care is not stipulated in decree as part of CS payments, then she can take you back to court to have CS increased...but no one can tell you if the judge will approve this, or how much of an increase (if any) there will be.

 

[mpfups]

I thought the law, atleast in Md was that you can only take a person back to court once every 3 years for a CS modification? It hasnt been 3 months let alone 3 years...Im pretty sure of this law but if anyone can shed some more light let me know...

Thanks VG

 

[VG1013]

Your welcome...I found this info, it might help you some.

There are two ways you can try to change a child support order in Maryland. Once every three years, either parent has the right to "request" the child support enforcement office to conduct a review of the child support order for possible modification. If you make your request for a review and modification, you should put your request in writing. You should explain why you are requesting the review, sign and date it, and include your child support case number and other identifying information on the request.

Either parent can also, "at any time", file a motion to modify an existing child support order. You should file the motion in the court which issued the child support order. The pro se family office can often provide forms and limited help to people filing court documents without a lawyer.*

To be successful in getting a child support order changed, you must show that a "material change in circumstances" has occurred since the most recent order was signed. Examples of changes can include such things as losing your job, having your income reduced, becoming disabled, and becoming incarcerated.

 

[smorr]

Isn't there a percentage rate for child support 'guidelines' that the court has to adhere to for the amount of child support she receives? If she's requesting more than the adjusted rate for the age of the children and your income, then I'd think she'd have a hard time getting the increase. Although stranger things have happened, unfortunately.

It's sad that she's putting the kids in the middle of this mess. I'd try to find someone in the court who can advise you as to your rights to fight it, if you can, and petition the court to have her prove the need for the increase by showing credible and verifiable proof of the day care costs. The examples in the previous thread don't show day care costs as proof, but you never know.


Good luck!

 

[mpfups]

The thing that pisses me off is that the courts don't care about making me poor...I own the house we lived in...I have the kids half the time (Every weekend (Friday through Monday morning) but i still have to pay her for CS & then on top of it might have to pay a small fortune for daycare so she can get a job....How this is fair i'll never know..Meanwhile shes living scott free with a friend & getting paid to do nothing...Shes the one one who wanted this marriage over, but i have to pay for this....All she wants is $$$..Thats all that makes her happy..Not the kids just the almighty dollar....

 

[smorr]

You're right - the court's don't care - and that's sad, but unfortunately, if they got personally involved in everyone's problems, they'd be out of business. And divorce is never fair, especially for the kids. My divorce was due to spousal abuse. He just wouldn't stop and I made a 15 year effort to keep trying to make it work. What would happen if you were to decide to sell the house? Would the court's not allow that? I can't imagine they wouldn't. I'm worried though that this would also backfire on you and she'd cry that she needs even more because she now has to pay for rent. I can only suggest that you try to acquire a very nasty lawyer who has a vengence for women. (can you imagine this advice coming from a woman!?) This may tip the scales in your favor in court, especially if the attorney is liked by the courts. Child support is meant for the children - I can tell you that my children were better dressed after the divorce than before - he spent much of his money on his own toys. But that doesn't stop her from spending the money on herself. What is your chances of winning custody of the children? Seems to me they'd be better off with you!

 

[stealth2]

It is pretty standard for the parents to split the cost of daycare. Whar do you suggest she do with the kids otherwise? Would you prefer that she quit her job so that she can stay home and raise the kids - and not pay daycare costs? Thart would certainly be an option - tho then your CS will likely go up. If you don't believe that they are in daycare - request the judge to compel her to provide receipts. But if she IS working and the kids ARE in daycare - you're responsible for a portion of it.

 

[dakoto70]

When I went to court for CS I was awarded 120 a month and no health insurance and no day care cost. I made it on my own. I think it is stupid to pay a million dollars in cs and than also be made to pay for day care costs. Spend the cs and pay for day care. He made more than I did, had insurance, I didn't and I was the one that had to supply everything and to top it all off he didn't pay his support.

 

[stealth2]

It would also help if you posted on ONE board in ONE thread so that everyone is on the same page. Otherwise you only confuse people - especially when you have different information in different posts. You've been around long enough to understand this, mpfups.

 

[lsut1ger]

Daycare is not CS

if he wasn't griping about paying day care, he'd be griping about her not working/making enough or who the kids were staying with while she was working her old night shift.

Why don't YOU get a new job/rearrage your hours so that you can stay with the kids while she works? Then you won't have day care costs and you can see your kids more. There...problem solved!

 

[mpfups]

First of all, i have demanded proof that my kids are in daycare....I have not recieved any info, neither has my lawyer..However i get threatening messages from her that she will get me for back costs & all...Her lawyer states that they are in daycare but my kids tell me different...They tell me sometimes they are sometimes they arent....

You are all taking this the wrong way...Im not griping about her working more hours or gettinga new job...I just think that its unfair for me to make me pay CS plus daycare on top of it when i have the kids as much as her IF NOT MORE...I own the house, i pay ALL their medical bills, their insurance is through my job.....

Ladies, cuz thats most of your rushing to judgement on me..Put yourself in my shoes...You would be crying foul if this was you....I pay her CS which i know goes directly for her portion to daycare, plus she wants me to pay daycare also...So thats 1200 bucks out of my pocket that i could be using for the kids instead of letting her do whatever she wants to do....

 

[mpfups]

lsutgrl : For your info i offered to have the kids during the weekdays, but she wanted none of that...I have been at my job for 10yrs, so why should i change my job around cuz she decides to have a midlife crisis..I have done everything I can to help her out..I dont believe in daycare...Perfect example is my EX found out that my daughter was being mistreated at one last week & is now out of that place....

I guarantee if you were in my position which many women arent, you all would be crying foul....So until you are dont rush to judgement on someone...

 

[stealth2]

I guarantee if you were in my position which many women arent, you all would be crying foul....So until you are dont rush to judgement on someone...

Oh, you're right. Since you're unable to look at a situation without stereotyping, ther rest of us aren't able to either.

 

[mpfups]

Momma im not meaning to stereotype but honestly how many women do you know that pay CS and/or daycare to a man?? Lets be honest with each other here now...All you ever hear is women whining that they dont get enough support but yet they fail to do anything to help themselves....Yes there are many women out there that arent like this as are there are many men that deserve to get whats coming to them...Im just trying to say here that in MY case i have an ex that only cares about herself & $$..Not a damn about her kids well being....