Ex wants joint custody of a child he has only willingly seen twice?

[LdiJ]

My ex filed for joint custody shortly after I filed for child support a little over two years ago. I was awarded full custody due to his non involvement previously.. here we are.. our son is almost 4. His father has not taken ANY of his summer visitation.. three weeks each year.. for either year. Visitation has been hit or miss.. always asking to switch and in most cases just doesn't show. The past three months he rarely sends a message or responds to messages I send about him picking our son up.. he will wait until last minute or after pick up time to say he's not coming and will not say why. He's done it again today. Our son is 3 and has started to ask where daddy is. The father will pay child support (not according to the courts schedule but decided on his own) and I'm going to give the case to CSS and just have them collect it because he will wait until midnight to show up and make a scene at my apartment. Is there a such thing as parental abandonment when the father with visitation chooses not to see his child for months? Advice?

No, visitation is a privilege not a requirement. Now, if he were to stop paying child support AND disappear for a year or two, AND you were married to someone who wanted to adopt your child, THEN abandonment might be a factor.

 

[Zigner]

Based on what the OP has posted, a modification needs to be made. It could be as simple as adding verbiage to the order stating that if the father is more than (x) minutes late, he forfeits that visitation, to something as extensive as modifying the court order to more closely reflect the actual visitation the father has exercised over the last two years.