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I just need some answers!!

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Sondrajms

New member
Thank you all for the suggestions. I’ll look at applying through the state. I have no idea about this whole process and what’s actually out there, but I’ve been looking. At this time I just needed some guidance as I’m not thinking clearly. I am seeing a psychiatrist which my husband pays for at this time. He’s trying, but I know this is hard for him and I HATE being a burden. There’s a lot more I didn’t share and I know this is not like cancer or being paraplegic, another reason I hesitated in going forward. I feel ridiculous and cannot understand why I can’t just get over it like I always have before. I just need time and thought after working for more than half my life it wouldn’t be so difficult. I feel like a useless nothing, I miss teaching and helping kids, but I have nothing to give them right now. It takes so much out of me. I’ve applied to teaching jobs because I thought I’ll just force myself to the interview and be ok. That backfired at the last job I had and it was awful. I can’t be guiding kids in this state. That’s not fair to them. I can’t even think straight. I’m doing little online tasks here and there and am trying to learn new skills so I can possibly make enough online to contribute. I’m trying everything I am capable of doing at this moment in my life, but having no support is difficult and I am not going to burden anyone else with my problems. It’s bad enough my husband has to deal with this. I help him every day though. I do everything around the house. Everything. Still I feel like a waste of space. Mental health still has such a stigma and people like to think you’re lazy or exaggerating things. That also sucks and it is always in the back of my head. Ugh. Anyway, thank you all for the advice. I’ll try to start on my own.
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
Thank you all for the suggestions. I’ll look at applying through the state. I have no idea about this whole process and what’s actually out there, but I’ve been looking. At this time I just needed some guidance as I’m not thinking clearly. I am seeing a psychiatrist which my husband pays for at this time. He’s trying, but I know this is hard for him and I HATE being a burden. There’s a lot more I didn’t share and I know this is not like cancer or being paraplegic, another reason I hesitated in going forward. I feel ridiculous and cannot understand why I can’t just get over it like I always have before. I just need time and thought after working for more than half my life it wouldn’t be so difficult. I feel like a useless nothing, I miss teaching and helping kids, but I have nothing to give them right now. It takes so much out of me. I’ve applied to teaching jobs because I thought I’ll just force myself to the interview and be ok. That backfired at the last job I had and it was awful. I can’t be guiding kids in this state. That’s not fair to them. I can’t even think straight. I’m doing little online tasks here and there and am trying to learn new skills so I can possibly make enough online to contribute. I’m trying everything I am capable of doing at this moment in my life, but having no support is difficult and I am not going to burden anyone else with my problems. It’s bad enough my husband has to deal with this. I help him every day though. I do everything around the house. Everything. Still I feel like a waste of space. Mental health still has such a stigma and people like to think you’re lazy or exaggerating things. That also sucks and it is always in the back of my head. Ugh. Anyway, thank you all for the advice. I’ll try to start on my own.
Have you considered doing online tutoring?
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
CORRECTION TO MY PRIOR INFORMATION

I've become aware that teachers employed by school districts here in California are not eligible for state disability benefits because they don't actually pay in to the state disability system. The suggestion and information I gave previously will not apply to this OP. I apologize for providing inaccurate information.
 

quincy

Senior Member
Educational Testing Services also hires people to score standardized tests online from home. They particularly look for people with teaching backgrounds.
Standardized test scoring requires a clear mind, good concentration skills and the ability to score a significant number of tests within a short period of time.

I am not sure someone who has an (admitted) inability to think clearly is the best candidate for this type of online work - although I suppose it is a possibility to explore.
 

commentator

Senior Member
What a shame about the disability insurance and teachers! And here I was thinking that CA was so progressive because of their disability program. But it seems that every state has different policies for the teachers and they usually get the shaft. I hate it!

I think maybe this OP's lack of clear thinking might be less extreme in a secure setting like working from home, but actually, there's very little of this type of work at home thing that turns out to be legitimate. I hope something will work out for her soon.
 

ajkroy

Member
What is the name of your state? California
I want to file for disability ASAP and definitely need a lawyer to help me with this process. I’m a 51 year old woman who has been an elementary teacher for 23 years. I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and have been in treatment and on meds for years. I was always able to manage it until recently. I quit my job as a teacher on Dec. 7 2018 because of severe anxiety and panic attacks. I just was not able to function anymore at work and this started escalating about 4 years ago. I quit three jobs in the last four years. My mind is fuzzy and I have trouble doing things that used to be so easy for me. I also suffer from constant neck and back pain from degenerate disc disease. This was diagnosed about 6 years ago but I’ve not had specific treatment due to lack of insurance. I’m at the point where I’m pretty much unable to even leave the apartment due to severe anxiety. I find it very difficult to even even speak on the phone. My husband can no longer handle my issues and wants me out as it’s causing him great distress and I’m now a financial burden to him. I’ve been seeing a new psychiatrist consistently since October 2018 and have had therapy over the years, which I can no longer afford. I didn’t qualify for unemployment and am out of money and relying on my husband. My biggest reason for hesitating to file sooner is that I read that it can take several months or even years to see if you even qualify, and even if you do, several more months to receive payment. Is this true? How am I supposed to survive until then? I want to be able to work, have worked since I was 16, but cannot seem to force myself anymore. I would like to start this process next week NO MATTER WHAT. But I do want to know how long it may take and if there’s any temporary relief in the meantime. I have asked this question so many times and have never gotten an answer. I hope I can find someone to help me file ASAP and please answer those simple questions now if possible. Thank you.
What qualifications do you need to take your retirement in California? If you've been teaching for 23 years, I would expect you've been paying into the retirement fund for that entire time. Can you retire and begin taking those funds now?
 

quincy

Senior Member
...I think maybe this OP's lack of clear thinking might be less extreme in a secure setting like working from home, but actually, there's very little of this type of work at home thing that turns out to be legitimate. I hope something will work out for her soon.
The companies that score state standardized tests are legitimate and have work-from-home options - but those working from home have their work monitored remotely and the work is not exactly a work-in-pajamas-work-when-you-want-to type of job. The worker will be communicating with the agency during the scoring.
 

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