just venting...opinions?

[Ohiogal]

hated her hated her hated her. bitter vengeful moronic woman using her children as pawns. OP move in with your fiance and tell your ex to bite rocks, pound sand and suck lemons to improve her disposition.
She spawned them in dirt and mud on a lake bed (okay maybe she did but humans don't and I was trying to give her credit for that and she was being a royal pain and maybe is pond scum. Anyway... I DID NOT LIKE HER.

Whew... i feel better now.

 

[LdiJ]

On the off chance that this really is dad (and remember, we have had it happen quite often in the past where both parties end up on this board) I am going to point out some of the downsides to moving that far away from the kids.

1. You are going to end up responsible for all or almost all of the transportation because you created the distance.

2. After a while that 1 1/2 hour round trip is going to get really old....it will get even older if you have to transport the kids to school in the morning.

3. It won't be as easy for you to participate in school events.

4. As the kids get older they may get resistant to visitation because they won't be able to participate in social events and activities while on your time (unless you are willing to make lots of 1 1/2 hour rounds trips)

5. Lets say that you have 8 exchanges a month, and maybe go to 3 social events, school activities or other activities. That is 11 exchanges of 90 miles round trip. That's 990 miles a month extra on your car. With gas at 3.00 a gallon, if your car gets 25 miles to the gallon, that's another 120.00 a month in gas on top of the wear and tear to your car. The IRS says that it costs 44 cents a mile to run a car, therefore in overall expense that's an extra 435.60 a month.

6. Odds are that phone calls will be long distance, which adds more expense.

So, there are downsides to moving 45 miles away. However, if you could get your girlfriend/fiance to meet you half way, and you all move someplace closer....in the long run you might be happier.

 

[fairisfair]

hated her hated her hated her. bitter vengeful moronic woman using her children as pawns. OP move in with your fiance and tell your ex to bite rocks, pound sand and suck lemons to improve her disposition.
She spawned them in dirt and mud on a lake bed (okay maybe she did but humans don't and I was trying to give her credit for that and she was being a royal pain and maybe is pond scum. Anyway... I DID NOT LIKE HER.

Whew... i feel better now.

Dang Ohio, I hope so!!! I know I am laughing!!

 

[tigger22472]

On the off chance that this really is dad (and remember, we have had it happen quite often in the past where both parties end up on this board) I am going to point out some of the downsides to moving that far away from the kids.

1. You are going to end up responsible for all or almost all of the transportation because you created the distance.

Oh come on LDIJ... it's 40 frigging miles... at the most likely a hour drive... do you really think he cares about that?

2. After a while that 1 1/2 hour round trip is going to get really old....it will get even older if you have to transport the kids to school in the morning.

AS if this wasn't thought of before.

3. It won't be as easy for you to participate in school events.

Why not? This is for benefit for LDIJ as she knows the geographic area. I live a hour from Lafayette and OFTEN times have school events there and there isn't one issue with participating!! Stop LOOKING for SH!T

4. As the kids get older they may get resistant to visitation because they won't be able to participate in social events and activities while on your time (unless you are willing to make lots of 1 1/2 hour rounds trips)

And who said he wasn't... MY GOD WOMAN!!

5. Lets say that you have 8 exchanges a month, and maybe go to 3 social events, school activities or other activities. That is 11 exchanges of 90 miles round trip. That's 990 miles a month extra on your car. With gas at 3.00 a gallon, if your car gets 25 miles to the gallon, that's another 120.00 a month in gas on top of the wear and tear to your car. The IRS says that it costs 44 cents a mile to run a car, therefore in overall expense that's an extra 435.60 a month.

Oh brother!

6. Odds are that phone calls will be long distance, which adds more expense.

Not if he uses cell phones.. ... gotta look for stuff don't ya

So, there are downsides to moving 45 miles away. However, if you could get your girlfriend/fiance to meet you half way, and you all move someplace closer....in the long run you might be happier.

Your mother bias is showing so through in this post!

 

[fairisfair]

Your mother bias is showing so through in this post!

I was thinking, heck I drive farther than that to work.

 

[Ohiogal]

Your mother bias is showing so through in this post!

Jeez and me and my ex live 75 miles apart and have joint legal and physical custody. Neither one of us hate it, we split the transportation because that is what is best for our daughter (to see mommy and daddy both working for what's best for her) and my daughter actually loves it. And yes she gets to participate in all her activities. 40 miles is NOTHING.

 

[haiku]

On the off chance that this really is dad (and remember, we have had it happen quite often in the past where both parties end up on this board) I am going to point out some of the downsides to moving that far away from the kids.

1. You are going to end up responsible for all or almost all of the transportation because you created the distance.Not neccesarily, always the case, and well its not that big a deal in todays world.....

2. After a while that 1 1/2 hour round trip is going to get really old....it will get even older if you have to transport the kids to school in the morning.as stated LOTS o fpeople drive that distance to work every day. and honestly I drive 5 hours one freakin way every moth for my steps, it aint no big thing when it comes to your kids

3. It won't be as easy for you to participate in school events.really? if its big enough, I bet the drive won't be that big a deal

4. As the kids get older they may get resistant to visitation because they won't be able to participate in social events and activities while on your time (unless you are willing to make lots of 1 1/2 hour rounds trips)again MAJOR projection

5. Lets say that you have 8 exchanges a month, and maybe go to 3 social events, school activities or other activities. That is 11 exchanges of 90 miles round trip. That's 990 miles a month extra on your car. With gas at 3.00 a gallon, if your car gets 25 miles to the gallon, that's another 120.00 a month in gas on top of the wear and tear to your car. The IRS says that it costs 44 cents a mile to run a car, therefore in overall expense that's an extra 435.60 a month.that IF he ends up doing all the driving, and again it may not be a big deal to him, In my house its called "fact of life"

6. Odds are that phone calls will be long distance, which adds more expense.most of america has cell phones now-look into it

So, there are downsides to moving 45 miles away. However, if you could get your girlfriend/fiance to meet you half way, and you all move someplace closer....in the long run you might be happier.what if fiance has an awesome house? it might not be worth it!

*****************************

 

[stealth2]

And maybe the fiance doesn't want to uproot her kids from the school they already attend.

 

[LdiJ]

Your mother bias is showing so through in this post!

Tig....you are way off in left field on this one. I am not on mom's side in any way, shape or form. If the mom in this case is the same one in the other thread, then I think she is a moron.

I just thought it worth pointing out to dad some of the complications of moving that far away....for HIS sake. I was thinking in terms of a 45 mile commute that I had at one time, and how incredibly old that got for me. I gave up on a good job because I hated the commute.

Maybe dad can afford the extra expense and maybe dad doesn't mind driving....but your reaction was way off base on that one.

For Stealth and Haiku,

I would like to point out my use of the word "might" and "may". Those were points for dad to ponder, NOT a definiative "you should do this".

 

[Ohiogal]

Tig....you are way off in left field on this one. I am not on mom's side in any way, shape or form. If the mom in this case is the same one in the other thread, then I think she is a moron.

I just thought it worth pointing out to dad some of the complications of moving that far away....for HIS sake. I was thinking in terms of a 45 mile commute that I had at one time, and how incredibly old that got for me. I gave up on a good job because I hated the commute.
Maybe dad can afford the extra expense and maybe dad doesn't mind driving....but your reaction was way off base on that one.

No offense LdiJ but there is a big difference between a job and your kids. I wouldn't drive this far for a job but I would gladly do it every day for my daughter. It depends on the priorities of the individual.

 

[stealth2]

For Stealth and Haiku,

I would like to point out my use of the word "might" and "may". Those were points for dad to ponder, NOT a definiative "you should do this".

For LDi,

I would like to point out my use of the word "maybe".

 

[LdiJ]

No offense LdiJ but there is a big difference between a job and your kids. I wouldn't drive this far for a job but I would gladly do it every day for my daughter. It depends on the priorities of the individual.

Of course someone would gladly do it for their kids. They would do it even if it DID get really old. I wasn't for a moment suggesting that he wouldn't be willing to do it for his kids. I was suggesting that he might regret the distance.

I am really disappointed with the responses to me on this thread. I merely gave dad some reasonable "food for thought" and everybody jumped all over me as thought I was telling him NOT to move.

There are downsides to moving 45 miles away from your kids. All I did was point out some potential ones.

 

[Ohiogal]

Of course someone would gladly do it for their kids. They would do it even if it DID get really old. I wasn't for a moment suggesting that he wouldn't be willing to do it for his kids. I was suggesting that he might regret the distance.

I am really disappointed with the responses to me on this thread. I merely gave dad some reasonable "food for thought" and everybody jumped all over me as thought I was telling him NOT to move.

There are downsides to moving 45 miles away from your kids. All I did was point out some potential ones.

I will agree with you that there are. i think the reason you may have gotten jumped (and i was not jumping you and i dont think that was anyone else's intention but I cannot speak for them) is because he didn't ask for the flaws but only wanted it in terms of his relationship with his ex and what she could do. Which if his ex is the moron from the other post, not much.

 

[haiku]

I will agree with you that there are. i think the reason you may have gotten jumped (and i was not jumping you and i dont think that was anyone else's intention but I cannot speak for them) is because he didn't ask for the flaws but only wanted it in terms of his relationship with his ex and what she could do. Which if his ex is the moron from the other post, not much.

exactly**************.

 

[haiku]

For LDi,

I would like to point out my use of the word "maybe".

and my "not neccesarily" 'if" and "may not be"