mediator did not want to hear anything

[corset]

What is the name of your state?Pa
good morning
this morning husband had a pre court hearing with the ncp mother and the mediator from the court house in media pa,
this is a brief summary as to what has occurred since june of this year
ncp takes son out of school without written or oral permission from father,
son has not seen father since july, there has been NO COMMUNCIATION
father has custody of son during the school year, (the school year started on august 29, 2005
here goes
the mother states that she had to take son from school to enroll him another school so he may be able to participate in marching band
she did not let father know about this marching band,
when cp tried to discuss his case the mediator did not want to hear his side of the story..
kindly tell me what can be done

 

[bononos]

I am guessing an agreement had not been reached.
In PA, a mediator does NOT report anything to the court except for if an agreement was reached or not.
Have they been ordered to report to another mediation or onto conciliation?
The conciliator can make more decisions and report findings and discussions to the court.
A mediator is supposed to simply try to bring the parties to a common agreement, not judge anyone.

 

[corset]

the mediator agreed that the son should be left with mother. however she did not want to hear the mother has been and continue to be in contempt of court, basically the father wishes were completely ignored,
so if the person reports back to the judge most likely the mother will be awarded custody of the son, however the ncp mother has not kept to the original court order issued last year.
the last time any communcation between father and son was on july 19, 2005,


you know what is soo sad about this, when son lived with his father and myself the son was always allowed to call his mother, however now that the roles are reversed the son has yet to call the father, not even on the bd which is stated in the custody agreement of last year,

my honest opinion the courts allowed a father and son relationship to be broken,

perhaps im being over dramatic, but i see this issue time after time, kids going to the parents and asking why didnt you fight for me why why why ??
god help us all

thanks for letting me vent
ann

 

[bononos]

Did he sign a new court order agreement????
Who the hell cares what the mediator said, thought, or felt.
If not, then NOTHING aside from, "No agreement made" will be said to the judge in regards to mediation.

What did he or his atty. file after mediation?
What did the paper say?

The confidentiality of the mediation process is protected by 42 Pa. C.S.A. §5949 dealing with confidential mediation communications and documents. Under this statute, all communications and documents that arise in mediation are privileged and therefore inadmissible except:

1. A settlement agreement may be introduced into evidence to enforce the agreement unless said agreement states that it is unenforceable or not intended to be legally binding.
2. Communications and documents arising in mediation are admissible to the extent that the communication is evidence relevant in a criminal matter. For example:
* a. A threat of bodily injury on a person.
* b. A threat that damage may be inflicted on real or personal property that would constitute a felony.
* c. Conduct during mediation that causes direct bodily injury.

 

[corset]

cp father did not sign or agree to anything
husband is representing himself

what can be filed on behalf of father?
contempt of court?
ncp interference, parential alientation?
please help so i can past this onto the father
thanks
ann

 

[bononos]

What County???
After mediation, the mediator fills out a form that must be filed that states "No Agreement Made". This must be filed, depending on your county as to where to file it, so that the issues of custody are further continued to either another mediation, conciliation, hearing, whatever.
If he's at mediation then I am assuming he already filed for custody modification for the issues you stated, or she did, if not, how has it come to mediation???
Who filed what to get mediation ordered?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Is this the same husband who can blame you for sending him porn on his military computer?
Was he going to tell the mediator about these charges?
Does mom know about his son't access to porn on the home computer?

What is the name of your state?Pa
hi there:
i will try not to ramble on,, here is the situation, three years ago my husband was deployed to the middle east he is in the army reserves, during his stay deployement i his wife sent via his military email adult porno pictures. there was never a problem until NOW, my husband used to work for a state university in Pa, back in november a fellow employee made a complaint stating that my husband was visting adult and child porno sites. my husband and his employer had a predis hearing and during this hearing they stated that he visited these sites however when he asked about these sites the sites could no longer be brought up onto the computer, my husband was fired,, also he asked about the pictures that they said was on the harddrive however again they said the pictures could not be viewed,, interesting, anyway the university sent the harddrive to the state police,, the state police and others keep saying that there are pics of children on this harddrive however we have the pics in question and they are far from being children or animals involved... the military came to my home and talked with both myself and my husband asking about these pics,,, they also searched my home and they found nothing,,,,, no porno,,, now the military wants to start separation process against my husband.. when we look at the paperwork that was given to my husband the changes are not consistant...
my concerns are many,, if these charges are soo bad why havent the state police come into my home and do a search...
there are only six emails that were sent to my husband using is military email, and he sent those pics back to his private emails,,,
they are stating that there are many, however when we asked what emails they wont tell us,, my husband was advise to call JAG,

ohh by the way my husband has over 20 years of service
thanks for any advise

ann

 

[bononos]

Oh, I have just gotta start checking past posts.

 

[corset]

the ncp mother filed to have the custody agreement modify
she wants full custody of the minor son who is 13 years old
the mother has the son during the summer months and father has him during the school year, the standard custody agreement applies, every other weekend and holidays and such
however their is also a situpation as to the son call either parent on the bd's
however son has not been back to the fathers house nor has there been any communication

it seems that this is not over by a long shot?
i was reading another post about just cause, showing contempt?
can father file this motion against ncp mother for failing to have son come over every other weekend?, taking him from his middle school and enrolling him without the fathers permission, written or orally.

also, the father found out via the court public access pages that today's court date was set
their is no communication, and we all know that if the courts grant her full custody the son will never hear or see his father again
some history ncp mother walked out on child when he was 10 months old
she decided that her boyfriend was more important than son
thanks for responding so fast
ann

 

[bononos]

can father file this motion against ncp mother for failing to have son come over every other weekend?, taking him from his middle school and enrolling him without the fathers permission, written or orally.

He can, but he should have done that a long time ago.
Now if he files, most likely a judge will just sign an order stating the issue should be consolidated with the current custody proceedings.

What are the reasons listed that the mother filed for modification?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Does mom know about the porn and how it ended your husband's military career instead of retiring?

Do you honestly think this won't come up when the court examins your husband's fitness as a parent or your role as a stepmother? Is there a reason that the child shouldn't have somehting like marching band to occupy his time rather than surfing on your computer?

 

[SingleMom67]

I am guessing an agreement had not been reached.
In PA, a mediator does NOT report anything to the court except for if an agreement was reached or not.
Have they been ordered to report to another mediation or onto conciliation?
The conciliator can make more decisions and report findings and discussions to the court.
A mediator is supposed to simply try to bring the parties to a common agreement, not judge anyone.

Just an FYI, Bononos, if the case is in Media, it's in Delaware County. Parties (in family court cases) will meet with a mediator then the matter is brought before a judge. There is no conciliation. But what I expect here is we really aren't getting the full story.

 

[corset]

first and foremost the computer has passwords and the son is not allowed on the computer
second we havent downloaded nor looked at any porno since this situation begin two years ago
second you have been told everything
the ncp mother felt that she since she was a stay at home mom it would be better for david to be there
my role as a stepmother is one of compassion and non judgemental unlike some on this forum

unlike so many parents that walk out on the kids and or withhold visitations from the other parent we have not
my husband and i have attended all parent student conferences, have taken off when needed and have put others infront of our selves.
and what do you think the son is or was doing well father was deployed? he was calling himself subterrean boy because he spent most of his time either watching tv or playing video games and btw he has access to a computer over at his mother house, and in fact looks at porno or soft porno over there so before you start slinging the mud look dont be sooo quick to judge people

thank you

 

[corset]

first and foremost the computer has passwords and the son is not allowed on the computer
second we havent downloaded nor looked at any porno since this situation begin two years ago
second you have been told everything
the ncp mother felt that she since she was a stay at home mom it would be better for david to be there
my role as a stepmother is one of compassion and non judgemental unlike some on this forum

unlike so many parents that walk out on the kids and or withhold visitations from the other parent we have not
my husband and i have attended all parent student conferences, have taken off when needed and have put others infront of our selves.
and what do you think the son is or was doing whenl father was deployed? he was calling himself subterrean boy because he spent most of his time either watching tv or playing video games and btw he has access to a computer over at his mother house, and in fact looks at porno or soft porno over there so before you start slinging the mud look dont be sooo quick to judge people

thank you

 

[corset]

just a little side bar for all of you who have followed my posts for many years
if you want to sling the porno which my husband was never convicted of any crimes either in federal or state laws.
the last time i looked at the constititution porno was and still is protected by the first admendment

perhaps parents should live in a plastic bubble and not have any adult life,,
i have read many posts on here where parents both cp and ncp have been rehab and or sent to jail and yet they get their children back,
taking drugs is against the laws, adult porno is not

what the mother did was take the son from the father which had a court order, the father nor my self never neglected the son,
thank you