MI Mother won't let me properly parent

[FarmerJ]

Dedikate , There are a lot of so called high functioning but borderline developmentally disabled- mentally ill- personality disorder people out there so I too suggest you keep the same kinds of log notes that group home staff make about the clients in the homes I work in. carefully selected words though, EG When ( name ) was met for visitation transfer she appeared to be in a good mood then upon returning the children she appeared to be very agitated and verbally aggressed in front of the children by swearing ( inappropriate language ) to me . (including more information about bad behaviors as needed. Not perfect But one other thing you may want to seek legal advice about would be recording interactions with her such as transfer times where you may encounter her. ( as to your growing marijuana I know its possible with enough insulation barriers and air exchanging ventilation equipment that one can grow in a home and not even neighbors would know , ( I have a relative who had a husband who has grown in a specially built grow room in the basement of the home for almost 35years now and the only time there ever is a smell is when he is smoking it, when they were together I had been to their home a lot and never could smell it . BUT in your situation perhaps you want to install a deadbolt on the door to the basement to remove any possibility of the minor children being able to access that area of the home.

 

[Dedikate]

I move to the 2nd phase of my parenting time schedule Feb 16th and Mother filed a motion for parenting time the entire week of her wedding in august. During this hearing i will be asking for my birth week for trade (I already tried the trade in OFW). She has obeyed the court order maybe 50-60% of the time regarding parenting time so I missed a lot of visitation time with my boys altogether. Would it be inappropriate to request a FROR during this hearing?

 

[stealth2]

I would ask for a "trade" in time, but I have to tell you - it's weird enough for an adult to NEED to spend their birthday with their kid, but... the whole WEEK? Ask for an equivalent time switch. Don't tie it in with your bday. My two either spent Mothers Day or my Bday w/their Dad. Yeah, it sucked. But they called me, and we celebrated when they were home. Don't make it all weird.

 

[Dedikate]

I would ask for a "trade" in time, but I have to tell you - it's weird enough for an adult to NEED to spend their birthday with their kid, but... the whole WEEK? Ask for an equivalent time switch. Don't tie it in with your bday. My two either spent Mothers Day or my Bday w/their Dad. Yeah, it sucked. But they called me, and we celebrated when they were home. Don't make it all weird.

I definitely am not the one needing the trade. And I agree with you. Im just trying to make her parenting time request fair for the both of us, as it's not fair for her to just consume my parenting time during her wedding without trading time. This problem was created by her. I just made a trade proposal in OFW and she refused it.

 

[stealth2]

I definitely am not the one needing the trade. And I agree with you. Im just trying to make her parenting time request fair for the both of us, as it's not fair for her to just consume my parenting time during her wedding without trading time. This problem was created by her. I just made a trade proposal in OFW and she refused it.

We all get that SHE asked for the time. What I'm saying is offer a trade that has nothing to do with YOUR birthday.

 

[Dedikate]

We all get that SHE asked for the time. What I'm saying is offer a trade that has nothing to do with YOUR birthday.

Got you! Sorry, I got confused. I will do that in court next week.

 

[commentator]

Quote: I'm also giving my attorney brain freeze by sending him so much evidence of wrongdoings.

Please do not allow that TMI brain freeze to be caught by the court. In other words, LISTEN to your attorney. STOP talking. Don't push or tell them how to run their business. Once the judge gets the opinion that you are the uncooperative nut case, your case is way hurt.

 

[stealth2]

It's rather normal to lett your thoughts go wild. For a while. And then? It's time to pull it together, figure out the stuff that's important and organize it - the facts, your thoughts, what you send to your lawyer. Every minute s/he spends reading/listening/answering? Costs you $$. In 6-15 minute increments, depending on how they bill. Even if it takes <1minute to read/respond? You're paying for 6-15 minutes. Honestly? This thread would have cost you $thousands if we were your lawyers (which we are not!).

Employ the KISS strategy with all of your communications - Keep It Simple, Stupid! Get as crazed as you want on your own time KISS for what you pay for - lawyer, Court, Mom.

ETA: Or if you prefer? BIFF. Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm.

 

[not2cleverRed]

Quote: I'm also giving my attorney brain freeze by sending him so much evidence of wrongdoings.

Please do not allow that TMI brain freeze to be caught by the court. In other words, LISTEN to your attorney. STOP talking. Don't push or tell them how to run their business. Once the judge gets the opinion that you are the uncooperative nut case, your case is way hurt.

I need to add: this is a very expensive way to lose.

Every time you contact your lawyer, it costs money. Realizing that, boil down your contacts to be a succinct and legally relevant as possible.

(Even doing that, they can still mess up and misplace a very important document. So focus in having your copies in order and in your own file, easy to find at a moment's notice - no shuffling.)