No paternity established, wanting to relocate

[kprice3]

Well, he was good enough for you to have sexual intercourse with so that's not saying much about you being a good person either, is it?

Well when someone’s abusive, they don’t show it at first. It’s all gone and dandy. At least I got out of it and I’m safe all I’m trying to do is keep my daughter safe.

 

[Eekamouse]

It sounds like you're planning to deprive her of the man you chose to father her. And even if he was abusive to you (were charges brought against him? Were the police ever called on him? Was he arrested for assaulting you?), that doesn't necessarily mean he'd hurt his child.

 

[not2cleverRed]

Well when someone’s abusive, they don’t show it at first. It’s all gone and dandy. At least I got out of it and I’m safe all I’m trying to do is keep my daughter safe.

Unless you reported the abuse to the police, or documented it in some legally recognizable way, you CANNOT use that excuse, legally, as a concern when discussing parenting time.

For now, do what you can to try and make your marriage work out. A lot can happen between now and delivery. But be prepared to co-parent.

 

[t74]

OP, Your problems are much larger than the "other man" in your family's life. You need to see a family counselor; take your DH with you. You state he wants to become a police officer. This is a stressful job in the best of circumstances for both the officer and the family. You are bringing too much baggage and history into it for it to be good for any of him, the family and the community in which he serves.