Questions about divorce, kids and child support

[Isis1]

So, we get married, then I get divorced and she can continue to get a check from me until she's in the grave?

or you, whichever is first.

 

[Proserpina]

Just curious, what role -- if any -- do pre-nups play in this?

Unfortunately none.

A pre-nup cannot override a contract between the sponsor (you) and the US government.

Although a savvy attorney might be able to use it as leverage if the two parties want to come to an agreement instead.

 

[kyky]

The federal court granted the plaintiff's motion for summary judgment and found the sponsor liable under the contract, concluding that the sponsor was obligated to maintain the alien spouse at 125 percent of the poverty income level. It then held an evidentiary trial on the issue of damages and awarded the alien spouse almost $19,000. This was the amount of money she was entitled to receive from the sponsor, calculated from the day the couple separated until the date of the decision, based on her right to receive maintenance at the 125 percent of poverty level. The court took into account the amount of money the alien spouse had already received during that period from the citizen spouse and from wages she had earned. The court also indicated it would award plaintiff's counsel reasonable attorneys fees in bringing the action and reminded the sponsor of his continuing obligation to maintain the alien spouse at the 125 percent level until the contract is terminated.

I got this from the link provided.

So this means that I am obligated to make a certain amount each year and fork it over to her if **** goes down? What if I become unemployed or can't work for some reason?

 

[Proserpina]

I got this from the link provided.

So this means that I am obligated to make a certain amount each year and fork it over to her if **** goes down? What if I become unemployed or can't work for some reason?

Not quite, but close.

You're not legally obligated to actually earn a certain amount - the court can't make you do that. However, you are legally obligated to (if necessary) provide her with a certain amount of support.

The obligation doesn't go away if you become unemployed, or even disabled - the amount would simply add up over time.

Edited: I'm really, really glad you're looking into this, OP. Far too many sponsors sign that form without realizing what it actually entails. I suspect many would back off if they truly understood the gravity of the obligation!

 

[kyky]

Not quite, but close.

You're not legally obligated to actually earn a certain amount - the court can't make you do that. However, you are legally obligated to (if necessary) provide her with a certain amount of support.

The obligation doesn't go away if you become unemployed, or even disabled - the amount would simply add up over time.

Edited: I'm really, really glad you're looking into this, OP. Far too many sponsors sign that form without realizing what it actually entails. I suspect many would back off if they truly understood the gravity of the obligation!

I did sign it. I told my immigration lawyer to hold off sending it to INS (or wherever it's supposed to go). I wanna talk to him and another lawyer to make sure that this is indeed how messed up the system is (no offense, but the gravity of the situation dictates that I pullout all the stops in terms of finding all of the issues and problems that could arise).

 

[kyky]

Not quite, but close.

You're not legally obligated to actually earn a certain amount - the court can't make you do that. However, you are legally obligated to (if necessary) provide her with a certain amount of support.

The obligation doesn't go away if you become unemployed, or even disabled - the amount would simply add up over time.

Edited: I'm really, really glad you're looking into this, OP. Far too many sponsors sign that form without realizing what it actually entails. I suspect many would back off if they truly understood the gravity of the obligation!

To add to this, God. Why does our government make such laws? And why are divorce laws so stacked against those that make the most money in a relationship (usually, it's men)?

 

[ecmst12]

Just so you understand, sponsorship is completely 100% separate from marriage.

Is this an arranged marriage or something?

 

[kyky]

Ok, I didn't sign the I-864. It turns out that I signed a G-28, she signed her G-28, I signed a G-325A, she signed her G-325A and I signed a I-129F form.

 

[Proserpina]

Ok, I didn't sign the I-864. It turns out that I signed a G-28, she signed her G-28, I signed a G-325A, she signed her G-325A and I signed a I-129F form.

Okay, so you're going the fiance visa route and you're very early into the process.

You're still going to have to submit the I-864 once you get married, in order for her to adjust status.

Same problem.

Make sure your attorney is VERY familiar with the cases involving a sponsored immigrant suing their sponsor.

 

[kyky]

Just so you understand, sponsorship is completely 100% separate from marriage.

Is this an arranged marriage or something?

No. And yes, that's the impression that I have thus far about the sponsorship. Can I get her to come over without the I-864? That last bit seems like border-line legal-financial rape.

Here's a short version of a long story.

I went to my cousin's wedding in Ukraine. She was one of the bridesmaids. At first we weren't really into each other, but grew on each other. I dated other girls before proposing and didn't push her into a relationship until she was the one that started adding pressure (I made no commitments to her prior and promised nothing in the way of a commitment or pushed her into the relationship). We went on trips and had fun. Then our feelings developed for each other and all was well. I came back with a ring and proposed to her. I've been working with a lawyer recommended by a friend to get her to come here (took longer than I expected). The wedding is planned for late May. Yes, she has strong feeling for me.

At first my family members warned me against her (they wanted to push me in the direction of hooking up with another girl), but to be honest, they have been dishonest in the past and tried to get us to send more and more $$$$, so I don't 100% trust them.

 

[kyky]

Okay, so you're going the fiance visa route and you're very early into the process.

You're still going to have to submit the I-864 once you get married, in order for her to adjust status.

Same problem.

Make sure your attorney is VERY familiar with the cases involving a sponsored immigrant suing their sponsor.

A good friend (who is also an attorney) recommended this guy. I signed the forms and such, but nothing has been sent to the fed yet.

 

[Proserpina]

No. And yes, that's the impression that I have thus far about the sponsorship. Can I get her to come over with the I-864? That last bit seems like border-line legal-financial rape.

Here's a short version of a long story.

I went to my cousin's wedding in Ukraine. She was one of the bridesmaids. At first we weren't really into each other, but grew on each other. I dated other girls before proposing and didn't push her into a relationship until she was the one that started adding pressure (I made no commitments to her prior and promised nothing in the way of a commitment or pushed her into the relationship). We went on trips and had fun. Then our feelings developed for each other and all was well. I came back with a ring and proposed to her. I've been working with a lawyer recommended by a friend to get her to come here (took longer than I expected). The wedding is planned for late May. Yes, she has strong feeling for me.

At first my family members warned me against her (they wanted to push me in the direction of hooking up with another girl), but to be honest, they have been dishonest in the past and tried to get us to send more and more $$$$, so I don't 100% trust them.

(Read my last post - I think we posted at the same time. You're going to have to submit that I-864 no matter what if she is going to live and work here legally)

 

[Proserpina]

A good friend (who is also an attorney) recommended this guy. I signed the forms and such, but nothing has been sent to the fed yet.

Right, I get that - but my point is that AFTER you get married (you're currently going through the K1 fiance visa process), you'll have to file another bunch of forms in order to make her a permanent resident.

Those forms include the I-864.

 

[kyky]

Right, I get that - but my point is that AFTER you get married (you're currently going through the K1 fiance visa process), you'll have to file another bunch of forms in order to make her a permanent resident.

Those forms include the I-864.

Yes, I understand.

 

[ecmst12]

If you are having all these worries about divorce, then you shouldn't be proposing or setting any wedding dates. Live together for a while. Get to know and trust her. That's the only way to get more confidence about your relationship and what the future will hold. You are scared because you don't know her well enough to marry her. Find out if there's another type of visa she can get for a year or so before you move forward with wedding plans. And don't get her pregnant yet either! I don't think she'll be able to work with any other type of visa but it's more important for you to get your feelings straight before you make it legal.

If you don't sponsor her, someone else will have to. And of course compared to sponsorship, the possibility of alimony/child support is not nearly as scary.