Restraining Orders

[sloanemom]

Thanks Quincy. My son's choice is to just get a lifetime RO if that means he doesn't have to go to court. I think I did post that my son was in a therapeutic school for severe anxiety and depression, as was the girl, but she never had to appear in court as her mother said she was too anxious and the judge approved the mother for speaking on her behalf.

His therapist has no problem going to court with him and speak on his behalf on how this has affected his mental health where he wont leave the house. IT kills me because he is such a great young man, he just got caught up with this crazy girl and her crazy mother. Her father really doesn't do anything.

There is so much I can do.

I did contact a lawyer and will discuss everything with him tomorrow. Apparently he is bull dog and has tried a couple of big cases, but I wont say who it is. I am going to ask if my son can do anything with what the courts messed up, the girl/ family filed false allegations, our lawyers gave us bad advice, etc etc. etc.

Obviously I sound like some crazy lady, but there is just so much more to this then what I posted here. But the court system failed him because he is a male. period.

 

[Zigner]

But the court system failed him because he is a male. period.

No, the system failed because mom was allowed to "speak for" her daughter. That's way out of line and should not have happened. Why didn't your lawyer object?

 

[quincy]

Thanks Quincy. My son's choice is to just get a lifetime RO if that means he doesn't have to go to court. I think I did post that my son was in a therapeutic school for severe anxiety and depression, as was the girl, but she never had to appear in court as her mother said she was too anxious and the judge approved the mother for speaking on her behalf.

His therapist has no problem going to court with him and speak on his behalf on how this has affected his mental health where he wont leave the house. IT kills me because he is such a great young man, he just got caught up with this crazy girl and her crazy mother. Her father really doesn't do anything.

There is so much I can do.

I did contact a lawyer and will discuss everything with him tomorrow. Apparently he is bull dog and has tried a couple of big cases, but I wont say who it is. I am going to ask if my son can do anything with what the courts messed up, the girl/ family filed false allegations, our lawyers gave us bad advice, etc etc. etc.

Obviously I sound like some crazy lady, but there is just so much more to this then what I posted here. But the court system failed him because he is a male. period.

If the court allows for your son's therapist to speak, that can be a positive. And if your son has a good attorney working on his behalf, that is another positive.

I question the need for (or the wisdom of) a "lifetime" order. Your son's attorney will no doubt fight against it.

Thank you for the update, sloanemom. I hope the craziness ends for your son and you soon. Good luck.

 

[sloanemom]

If the court allows for your son's therapist to speak, that can be a positive. And if your son has a good attorney working on his behalf, that is another positive.

I question the need for (or the wisdom of) a "lifetime" order. Your son's attorney will no doubt fight against it.

Thank you for the update, sloanemom. I hope the craziness ends for your son and you soon. Good luck.

HI Quincy,

My son is the one who wants a life time RO so he doesnt have to appear in court. He will do anything so he doesnt have to go. His anxiety is that bad.

I am trying to figure out a way where he wont have to speak, he may go if he doesnt have to speak.

Zigner,

they were both minors at the time so the girl was excused with all her false allegations and her mother spoke, but my son had to show, even if they had no proof.

 

[quincy]

HI Quincy,

My son is the one who wants a life time RO so he doesnt have to appear in court. He will do anything so he doesnt have to go. His anxiety is that bad.

I am trying to figure out a way where he wont have to speak, he may go if he doesnt have to speak.

Zigner,

they were both minors at the time so the girl was excused with all her false allegations and her mother spoke, but my son had to show, even if they had no proof.

If he wants someone to speak for him, he will need an attorney.

 

[LdiJ]

If he wants someone to speak for him, he will need an attorney.

I echo this advice. He NEEDS an attorney.

 

[quincy]

I understand sloanemom's concern about the cost of another attorney - but some legal matters should just not be handled without one.

 

[HighwayMan]

I'm still trying to figure out how this relates to legal ethics or malpractice

 

[quincy]

I'm still trying to figure out how this relates to legal ethics or malpractice

At this point, it doesn't. How sloanemom's son was represented by the attorney earlier was a concern for her, however.

 

[HighwayMan]

I was worried for a bit and thought I missed something obvious again!

 

[quincy]

I was worried for a bit and thought I missed something obvious again!

Nope. You didn't miss anything.

 

[sloanemom]

Thanks all. Sorry to confuse everyone. You didnt miss anything highwayman. We just got some really BAD advice from our first lawyer, and that advice has caused all of this.


So I have decided to get another lawyer. easy right? not so easy. I got all these names of these high profile lawyers and none wont call me back. I tell the 'seceratry' the story and then she will pass it on to the lawyer and then call me back, and then they dont I eventually found one, who said she will charge me 300 to just sit with her. So I told her fine and now we are trying to find a day to do that. I didn't ask how much all the rest is going to cost. But we really dont have a choice.

Anyway, so far no news. I have lost so much sleep as I get so angry thinking of that family.

Sorry for my vent. I just get angry and feel so powerless. I always trusted our legal system, and always was under the assumption that people just dont get arrested for nothing. Truth is, after what happened to my son, you truly are at the mercy of the court system and its not about whose telling the truth, its about whats the easiest thing to do.

 

[sloanemom]

No, the system failed because mom was allowed to "speak for" her daughter. That's way out of line and should not have happened. Why didn't your lawyer object?

she was still 17, and my son turned 18, so she didnt have to be in court apparently. Her mother told the judge that she was at an appt. but her facebook that day, time stamped, says she was home taking selfies.

 

[quincy]

Thanks all. Sorry to confuse everyone. You didnt miss anything highwayman. We just got some really BAD advice from our first lawyer, and that advice has caused all of this.


So I have decided to get another lawyer. easy right? not so easy. I got all these names of these high profile lawyers and none wont call me back. I tell the 'seceratry' the story and then she will pass it on to the lawyer and then call me back, and then they dont I eventually found one, who said she will charge me 300 to just sit with her. So I told her fine and now we are trying to find a day to do that. I didn't ask how much all the rest is going to cost. But we really dont have a choice.

Anyway, so far no news. I have lost so much sleep as I get so angry thinking of that family.

Sorry for my vent. I just get angry and feel so powerless. I always trusted our legal system, and always was under the assumption that people just dont get arrested for nothing. Truth is, after what happened to my son, you truly are at the mercy of the court system and its not about whose telling the truth, its about whats the easiest thing to do.

Thank you for the update.

It generally takes an appointment with a lawyer for an attorney to discuss the specifics of a case with you. Only the most general of information will be provided over the phone.

Many attorneys will offer free initial consultations but these free consultations can be brief. You could be billed if you exceed the time set aside for this "free" discussion so it is important to learn in advance what the attorney charges - and how the hourly rate is charged (quarter hour, half hour, full hour). Keep a close eye on the time.

You should write out all important questions before your appointment and stick to these questions. Bullet points can help you stay on track.

I hope the new attorney works better for your son. Good luck.

 

[sloanemom]

thanks quincy, we just had our first meeting, $300. for that. Then she said we put up 10,000 to start, but its like a bank, and as they do the work, they withdraw from that and if there is anything left over, then we get back. However if it costs more, then we put more in. She was shocked when she was reading the 'file'. She basically said what we have been saying, the lawyers we had really gave bad advice. I didnt tell her we are hiring her, because im still trying to figure out how to get 10,000. Thats a lot of MONEY. Feeling a little defeated again.