so much control from cp

[CourtClerk]

Cooking good, fresh food is (I find) cheaper than buying the processed gunk.

There is an AWESOME farmer's market by my job on Fridays...

can you say FRESH veggies??? yummy yummy

 

[faithnlve]

Look, Dad has custody YES! But that does not mean I am not an involved mom, nor does it mean that I should relinquish my concerns about my son's health and just do as the custodial parent wants. These gluten free diets are something new being tried on autistic children. Some work some don't. As for dad having our son "most" of the time, and it is more difficult for him, bull. I have my son 14 days out of the month.....so I HAVE HIM AS MUCH! So some people should not just jump to conclusions. Nor should people think I am whining and fighting back with my ex so "I" look like "the" victim which disgusted me while reading. I spoke with his school case manager yesterday and they agreed with me. My son has lost 8 pounds, is pale, and not focusing as well. Plus dad is ONLY sending gluten free hot dogs and vegetable chips EVERY day as his lunch. Now when I first came in here it had to do with not agreeing with him, and him threatening if I did not feed my son what I was told, I could not see him. I asked about checking it out medically, I mentioned talking to his school, I mentioned the so called obnoxious threats my ex made if I didn't do as HE says. So I called the guardiem et litum. And this is what he said. He does not agree putting a teenage severely autistic child on a new diet without slowly introducing him to it. Plus he needs vitamins to replace what he is not getting from the diet. Plus my ex should be consulting with me as well and having this implemented into his IEP at school through his nutritionist before doing so. Plus, the et litum also said since our son has lost alot of weight and is pale, the diet is not being properly administered as I was concerned with. Since I do not have legal or sole custody and my ex does, then I would have to take him to court to order dad to stop the diet. So please, there is absolutely no reason for some of you posters to assume what my intentions are, they are only for the sake of my son. Where is CJane when I need her? Anyways, Thanks for alot of support on this, I am just so frustrated, and KNOW I have to go back to court. My son will never be able to live on his own. He is severely autistic. Very very difficult at times. I also have a beautiful little 5 year old angel with a mild form of cerebral palsy, I am a full time LNA now, and I have had much to struggle with. I do have a wonderful hubby, he really is a sweetie. Just he is very protective of me. He loves my kids, two of them are his . The ones whom I don't have custody of..Wiley Bunch I believe said it best, it changes when they turn 18. So true! Court always seems the easy way into more battles, and the only time I will go for the court battle is when the kids begin to suffer. If this diet works for some, fantastic, but it is harming my son as I see. Thanks again, and sorry for all my venting. Love ya all, I really doooooo!!
God Bless**************......Faith

 

[wileybunch]

Look, Dad has custody YES! But that does not mean I am not an involved mom, nor does it mean that I should relinquish my concerns about my son's health and just do as the custodial parent wants. These gluten free diets are something new being tried on autistic children. Some work some don't. As for dad having our son "most" of the time, and it is more difficult for him, bull. I have my son 14 days out of the month.....so I HAVE HIM AS MUCH! So some people should not just jump to conclusions. Nor should people think I am whining and fighting back with my ex so "I" look like "the" victim which disgusted me while reading. I spoke with his school case manager yesterday and they agreed with me. My son has lost 8 pounds, is pale, and not focusing as well. Plus dad is ONLY sending gluten free hot dogs and vegetable chips EVERY day as his lunch. Now when I first came in here it had to do with not agreeing with him, and him threatening if I did not feed my son what I was told, I could not see him. I asked about checking it out medically, I mentioned talking to his school, I mentioned the so called obnoxious threats my ex made if I didn't do as HE says. So I called the guardiem et litum. And this is what he said. He does not agree putting a teenage severely autistic child on a new diet without slowly introducing him to it. Plus he needs vitamins to replace what he is not getting from the diet. Plus my ex should be consulting with me as well and having this implemented into his IEP at school through his nutritionist before doing so. Plus, the et litum also said since our son has lost alot of weight and is pale, the diet is not being properly administered as I was concerned with. Since I do not have legal or sole custody and my ex does, then I would have to take him to court to order dad to stop the diet. So please, there is absolutely no reason for some of you posters to assume what my intentions are, they are only for the sake of my son. Where is CJane when I need her?
God Bless**************......Faith

Well, I'm confused now b/c I thought you had visitation, but you're saying here you have shared custody, you 14 days, Dad 16? And, why didn't you mention he was pale and had lost weight in your FIRST post because, without more context for the weight loss, that could be the big concern, not whether Dad was nice in explaining how diet needed to be administered.

 

[haiku]

If you have him 14 days out of the month....how is your son getting gluten free hot dogs and chips on THOSE days at school?.... (and honestly, my child went months where she ate peanut butter and fluff every single day....kids do that, its actualy very common for ASD kids too... they live and grow just fine..)

And WHY haven't you met with his doctor by now? if you have him 14 days of the month?....

Also a GAL is not usually a medical professional......for what thats worth....

 

[LdiJ]

Well, I'm confused now b/c I thought you had visitation, but you're saying here you have shared custody, you 14 days, Dad 16? And, why didn't you mention he was pale and had lost weight in your FIRST post because, without more context for the weight loss, that could be the big concern, not whether Dad was nice in explaining how diet needed to be administered.

Her first post was before she consulted with the school and the GAL. I think that there is just more info coming to light.

 

[wileybunch]

Her first post was before she consulted with the school and the GAL. I think that there is just more info coming to light.

About him looking pale and weight loss?
And, she's since spoken to the doctor, but then pale and weight loss wasn't mentioned, either? She called him to see if he'd ordered the diet, but she never mentioned to us she was already concerned about paleness and weight loss and apparently didn't discuss that with his doctor, either. ::::

I mentioned earlier about giving the diet a try and watching the results, but she's saying NOW she already knows at least some of the results. I just don't get it -- that would have been a big part of a convo w/his doctor, I would think.

 

[CourtClerk]

Faith, we've been through this 1000000000 times. You are the noncustodial parent and in Vermont, there is NO joint custody. Dad calls the shots. Until you can change that, you need to stop.

 

[faithnlve]

Whoa guys! Here is my schedule with my son and his siblings. Every other Friday, Saturday and Sunday, every Tuesday and Thursday night after school until 8:00pm. I have no legal or shared custody. This state does NOT just give it. Both parents HAVE to agree. I can't even go into court claiming joint even with having my son this much. I have him the same amount of quality time as my ex. Wiley I didn't mention the pale and losing weight, because we didn't realize how much weight he had lost until Sunday night, and I "thought" he looked pale too. The school on monday mentioned to me how pale he looked. So they kind of confirmed my concerns. Faith

 

[faithnlve]

Faith, we've been through this 1000000000 times. You are the noncustodial parent and in Vermont, there is NO joint custody. Dad calls the shots. Until you can change that, you need to stop.

DOH!!! Thats what I was trying to tell the other posters. And stop what? Being a mom?

 

[CourtClerk]

DOH!!! Thats what I was trying to tell the other posters. And stop what? Being a mom?

No, stop all the incesant drama...

I (personally) think you're more upset at the fact that you have no control and your ex is paying you absolutely no attention.

 

[qurice]

Why are you making things so difficult? You have two choices:

1) Tell dad you'll follow the diet, and follow it. And if he needs vitamins to compensate, why don't you just give them to him?

2) Tell dad you'll follow the diet and feed him whatever you want.

 

[CourtClerk]

Why are you making things so difficult? You have two choices:

1) Tell dad you'll follow the diet, and follow it. And if he needs vitamins to compensate, why don't you just give them to him?

2) Tell dad you'll follow the diet and feed him whatever you want.

And there it is...
Spoken in it's most simple terms

 

[mommyof4]

These gluten free diets are something new being tried on autistic children.

No, it is not 'something new' that is being tried on autistic children. (What an odd choice of phrase.)

I do not have a child with any disorder. However, even I attempt to try to stick to a GF diet just for general good nutrition habits. I have known about the GF diet for children with autism (among other issues) for years.

If I, a parent of children that has no disorders, have known about this diet, then why haven't YOU? It's actually very common and many, many doctors recommend at least trying it to see if it helps. It may not 'cure' the disorder, but in many cases, it does bring on remarkable improvement.

I agree with the others. You have spent 3 pages focusing on DAD. Who the h*ll cares about Dad? The only person that matters is your son. So DAD has instituted a new diet that might help. It sounds like that is the huge issue....DAD came up with this idea and you resent MIGHTILY anything that DAD would do in regards to your child.

If it helps, who CARES whose idea it was?

Oh, and it wouldn't hurt your other kids to at least loosely follow the same diet. Natural healthy food. What's wrong with that?

 

[faithnlve]

The school has contacted dad. They do not feel this diet is going to work with our son either. He refuses the change, which is what I knew would happen, and he is pale and not focusing. The school, dad and I are meeting next week to come up with a plan. Thanks all Faith

 

[wileybunch]

The school has contacted dad. They do not feel this diet is going to work with our son either. He refuses the change, which is what I knew would happen, and he is pale and not focusing. The school, dad and I are meeting next week to come up with a plan. Thanks all Faith

Wouldn't it make sense for you and ex to meet with the Ped? Why are you having the school call a meeting? I don't get why people want to INVITE government interference in parenting decisions. What's the school going to do -- give your son his vitamins each day?