Terminating parental rights

[amazil]

What is the name of your state? Washington State

I was wondering if I can give up my parental rights willingly. Or does a judge have to approve of my decision to terminate my parental rights.

 

[tigger22472]

What is the name of your state? Washington State

I was wondering if I can give up my parental rights willingly. Or does a judge have to approve of my decision to terminate my parental rights.

A judge has to approve it as well as the other parent. This generally WILL NOT happen without there being another person (usually the spouse of the other parent) willing to adopt. Few states allow it to happen otherwise.

However, you can give up all rights any time you want. What you can't just give up is the obligations (ie Child Support).

 

[kuna]

The big question should be why would any one want to ........

 

[tigger22472]

The big question should be why would any one want to ........

Because this is the new 'fad.' I am not going to sit here and be completely hypocritical since my husband did adopt my children, however, we get asked this question SEVERAL times a week on this site by the parenting wanting to give up rights or a custodial parent (most of the time women) wanting to get rights taken.

"My ex hasn't called in a week can I get his rights taken away?"
"If I give up my rights will I still have to pay support?"
"I don't get to see my child, what forms do I need to give up my rights?"
"My ex does pay support and he does have his visitation but he abuses my kids, can I have his rights taken away?"
"Do I need to contact the biological father when my new husband and I file for adoption?"

This country was and IS all (well ok.. supposed to be) about us having rights ... but when it comes to children it seems we are all to quick to get rid of them or take them away. It's just sad to me.


Yes, I went through the process of TPR and step-parent adoption and although I admit I would do it again in a heartbeat, it was still a very tough decision. Not only did it essentially wipe out my children's biological parent but it reflected on me. How did I ever pick someone who would abandon their children? In the end NOTHING erases biology.

 

[Grace_Adler]

I can't really tell for sure if you need an adoption in WA to do a TPR, although it kinda looks that way, but thought this might be helpful.

http://www.leg.wa.gov/RCW/index.cfm?section=26.33.120&fuseaction=section

RCW 26.33.120
Termination -- Grounds -- Failure to appear.
(1) Except in the case of an Indian child and his or her parent, the parent-child relationship of a parent may be terminated upon a showing by clear, cogent, and convincing evidence that it is in the best interest of the child to terminate the relationship and that the parent has failed to perform parental duties under circumstances showing a substantial lack of regard for his or her parental obligations and is withholding consent to adoption contrary to the best interest of the child.

(2) Except in the case of an Indian child and his or her alleged father, the parent-child relationship of an alleged father who appears and claims paternity may be terminated upon a showing by clear, cogent, and convincing evidence that it is in the best interest of the child to terminate the relationship and that:

(a) The alleged father has failed to perform parental duties under circumstances showing a substantial lack of regard for his parental obligations and is withholding consent to adoption contrary to the best interest of the child; or

(b) He is not the father.

(3) The parent-child relationship of a parent or an alleged father may be terminated if the parent or alleged father fails to appear after being notified of the hearing in the manner prescribed by RCW 26.33.310.

(4) The parent-child relationship of an Indian child and his or her parent or alleged father where paternity has been claimed or established, may be terminated only pursuant to the standards set forth in 25 U.S.C. Sec. 1912(f).


[1987 c 170 § 6; 1984 c 155 § 12.]


http://www.leg.wa.gov/RCW/index.cfm?fuseaction=chapterdigest&chapter=26.33

http://www.leg.wa.gov/rcw/index.cfm?fuseaction=title&title=26



If there is anything else under TPRs, it may be under something else too. Like in NC, you can find it under the Juvenile heading and under Adoption.

 

[dallas702]

I don't see anything in there about needing a step-parent.

In this day and age it is an insult to a woman for a court to claim that she couldn't raise a child on her own if she and biodad agree to terminate his parental rights...for whatever reason they want. The same goes for a dad and biomom who want to terminate HER parental rights. How does the state claim the right to interfere with the parental status if both parents agree and the child is not harmed? It seems absurd...especially considering the "freedoms" we are supposed to have. Of course, it can not be a unilateral action. One parent stepping away without the consent of the other certainly doesn't diminish the responsibility of both parties.

 

[tigger22472]

In this day and age it is an insult to a woman for a court to claim that she couldn't raise a child on her own if she and biodad agree to terminate his parental rights...for whatever reason they want.

I dont' think it has anything to do with being a woman and more so about not *******izing children. When there is a single parent adoption that is one thing but we are talking about a child who has TWO legal parents and allowing one to walk away from the rights and obligations. It also comes down to there isn't anyone else to go after if the parent that retains rights has to seek government assistance. I realize that this is the case of intact families also, but just stating how things are looked at.

 

[dallas702]

Yeah. That's the government ASSUMING that the custodial parent is not capable of caring for the child. That's not only an insult, it is a very dangerous assumption and invasion of every parent's right to raise their children.

It is an attitude that is growing in all phases of family law and family environment. Yesterday I was informed that I could not (according to the caseworker) homeschool my granddaughter (as a foster parent) because "some" foster parents in the past didn't do the work necessary to ensure that the children were being educated. So, my years as a teacher and college professor (and raising 5 other children) are moot in the eyes of DFS because "some" others didn't do it right. That is the norm of thinking about families these days. Only the GOVERNMENT can be good at raising our children because we are ALL incompetent since "some" have screwed up.

We're on a very fast and slippery slope.

 

[AHA]

I don't see anything in there about needing a step-parent.

In this day and age it is an insult to a woman for a court to claim that she couldn't raise a child on her own if she and biodad agree to terminate his parental rights...for whatever reason they want. The same goes for a dad and biomom who want to terminate HER parental rights. How does the state claim the right to interfere with the parental status if both parents agree and the child is not harmed? It seems absurd...especially considering the "freedoms" we are supposed to have. Of course, it can not be a unilateral action. One parent stepping away without the consent of the other certainly doesn't diminish the responsibility of both parties.

There are thousands and thousands of kids (I was one of them) that are being raised right by just 1 parent, but the fact is, that if something should happen to that parent or that parent's ability to support and provide for the child and the other parent has been relinquished of his/her rights, what happens to the kid? It ends up in the system and all the taxpayers will have to pay for it's upbringing. By ensuring there are 2 parents involved there is a bigger chance that the kid will be provided for and won't become a child of the state.
I totally see why 2 parents rights should remain, unless one of the parents is a criminal/abuser etc. It should be all about the needs, protection and security of the child, not the regrets or unwillingness of the parents that created the child. They had a choice before conceiving, the child never had a choice in anything.

 

[dallas702]

And with extended families living far away, or not wanting to take over the responsibility, your point is well taken.

 

[amazil]

The big question should be why would any one want to ........

I cheated on my wife and I was ignorant and I got the female pregnant. The baby was an accident. I do not want to be any part of the baby's life at all. I got two kids and a wife that I love so dearly. But I wasnt thinking about them because of my ignorance and weak temptation. And I'm trying to better my relationship and trust with my wife and I'm scared to lose my family.

 

[amazil]

Right now I am an alleged father. The female don't even know who fathered her child. I'm scared that I might be the father, but if I am I want to terminate my parental rights to that child.

 

[stealth2]

Well, dude.... if the kid's yours, you can expect the mother to file for support and that you'll be on the hook. Time to stand up and take responsibility for your actions.

 

[amazil]

Well, dude.... if the kid's yours, you can expect the mother to file for support and that you'll be on the hook. Time to stand up and take responsibility for your actions.

Yes I'll pay child support, if the child is mine. It's my mistake, if the child is mine. But can I still give up my parental rights? Like I said, I don't want to be any part of the child's life.

 

[AHA]

Yes I'll pay child support, if the child is mine. It's my mistake, if the child is mine. But can I still give up my parental rights? Like I said, I don't want to be any part of the child's life.

How can you be so cold to your own flesh and blood (if the baby actually IS yours)? What evil did that little baby ever do to you? You do realise that if the baby is yours, that's your older kids' SIBLING, so not only will you be taking away a father for that poor child, but also a sibling for the kids you DO love??!! You are being cruel to every child you have created, but hey, good luck to them in life.