Terminating parental rights

[stealth2]

You don't have to either petition for or utilize any visitation rights.

 

[dallas702]

Stealth has it right. No one can force you to "parent" the child, but if you are the biodad, and the mother wants support from you, you will have to pay. You should think carefully about stepping completely away, though. This child is the half-brother/sister of your other children. They might want to know him/her someday. And, you may change your mind in the future. Who knows....if something happened to your present family, and you couldn't have other children, you just might want to start over with your "lost" child. It can and does happen every day.

If the biomom meets and marries a "dad", he can adopt with your permission. See how you feel at that time. Maybe you'll hate him and want your own input into the child's life. No one but God knows the future.

Get the paternity test, but don't file anything yet. If your wife can't live with your mistake...including the presence of a child...you have a long, hard road ahead anyway. Either your wife forgives you, or she doesn't. That halfway crap of holding it over your head later will kill your marriage anyway. You made a mistake...a big one...but the ball is in your wife's court. She should want you to maintain a relationship with YOUR child (and your children's sibling), rather than walking completely away. It's about being selfish vs. unselfish. You are being unselfish by offering financial support, but being fearful of your wife's reaction to the child is not going to help either of you in the long run.

 

[amazil]

She forgives me. She's a very patient and wonderful woman, and THAT is why I regret what I have done to her. I've caused her too much pain. She forgives, but still hurts. All SHE AND I want is for me to give up my parental rights to the child. She and I do not want the female or the child to interfere with our relationship/marriage in the future. But if I have to pay child support, she understands.

Stealth has it right. No one can force you to "parent" the child, but if you are the biodad, and the mother wants support from you, you will have to pay. You should think carefully about stepping completely away, though. This child is the half-brother/sister of your other children. They might want to know him/her someday. And, you may change your mind in the future. Who knows....if something happened to your present family, and you couldn't have other children, you just might want to start over with your "lost" child. It can and does happen every day.

If the biomom meets and marries a "dad", he can adopt with your permission. See how you feel at that time. Maybe you'll hate him and want your own input into the child's life. No one but God knows the future.

Get the paternity test, but don't file anything yet. If your wife can't live with your mistake...including the presence of a child...you have a long, hard road ahead anyway. Either your wife forgives you, or she doesn't. That halfway crap of holding it over your head later will kill your marriage anyway. You made a mistake...a big one...but the ball is in your wife's court. She should want you to maintain a relationship with YOUR child (and your children's sibling), rather than walking completely away. It's about being selfish vs. unselfish. You are being unselfish by offering financial support, but being fearful of your wife's reaction to the child is not going to help either of you in the long run.

 

[AHA]

She forgives me. She's a very patient and wonderful woman, and THAT is why I regret what I have done to her. I've caused her too much pain. She forgives, but still hurts. All SHE AND I want is for me to give up my parental rights to the child. She and I do not want the female or the child to interfere with our relationship/marriage in the future. But if I have to pay child support, she understands.

I wouldn't call any relationship that would gladly sacrifice an innocent child a healthy relationship. You have and will have too deep issues to handle. Good luck to ALL the kids involved in your selfish games!

 

[genivieve]

ahh my favorite topic, so glad I had a few minutes to check out the forum. Besides PMS can be a rather good thing . You people are coming down way to hard on this man. Don’t give me this sh#t about being a parent is not a choice. Mothers have all the choices and men have none. And lets drop this condom thing again because there’s no way your going to convince me that you all are Virgin Marys... there is no immaculate conception.

The man doesn’t WANT to be a father. SO WHAT! Sure it would be awful if he already had a relationship with the child and then walked out. Come on, how many people are on here blatting that their husbands traded them in and hasn’t paid a dime or seen the kids since the birth of Christ. Give me a break there nothing lost if the man was never there to start with.There plenty of decent people out there who have been raised with NO parents yet survive, live healthy constructive lives. A woman can walk into a abortion clinic and opt to kill her kid, yet when a man stands up and says "I don’t want to be a father" You all are out there with the tar and feathers.

And what the hell has our society become lately anyways? Women have done nothing in the past years but degrade, discredit, and abuse the child support system. Thus the good old paternity test is now mandatory. What they just require it now because it sounded good? LOL Nah it proved now that women are disgusting peanut butter legs that cant keep their legs closed to the whole public. As a woman myself I think its repulsive that some Jerry Springer slob has to have five guys tested cause she cant remember who the hell poked her. And the bigger problem is…. That it’s not just the Jerry Springer show, its happening in courts all over the country every day. Yuck yuck yuck. The decline in virtue, modesty, and a monogamous relationship is GONE. And what a pity, we are not advancing in society we are reverting back to the chimp days.

Oh and of course my most favorite. A man paying support for the six years and then finds out his wife had an affair and the kid is not his and yet he still has to pay. This makes me the sickest. He should be able to sue his wife. Have her arrested and thrown in jail for perjury. Make her pay some kind of consequence for being an adulteress whore. The good old Scarlett letter works for me, then again it would probably become some new fashion statement (please pass the midol)

Listen amazil if your choice is not to visit or see the child make sure it is uninhibited by your guilt, your wife, or kids. This decision has to be yours and only yours.
Don’t expect to walk back into this child's life four years from now. You have to live with the consequences as your are now and no one else.

 

[amazil]

I choose to terminate my rights if I am the father. I never meant to get the female pregnant. I was weak and also had a weak temptation. I love my wife and kids dearly. I was never around for the pregnancy and birth of the female. The female gave birth in May 2004 and a year later she's trying to find the father for child support. I've never seen the child at all and don't want to. That child was a mistake.

ahh my favorite topic, so glad I had a few minutes to check out the forum. Besides PMS can be a rather good thing . You people are coming down way to hard on this man. Don’t give me this sh#t about being a parent is not a choice. Mothers have all the choices and men have none. And lets drop this condom thing again because there’s no way your going to convince me that you all are Virgin Marys... there is no immaculate conception.

The man doesn’t WANT to be a father. SO WHAT! Sure it would be awful if he already had a relationship with the child and then walked out. Come on, how many people are on here blatting that their husbands traded them in and hasn’t paid a dime or seen the kids since the birth of Christ. Give me a break there nothing lost if the man was never there to start with.There plenty of decent people out there who have been raised with NO parents yet survive, live healthy constructive lives. A woman can walk into a abortion clinic and opt to kill her kid, yet when a man stands up and says "I don’t want to be a father" You all are out there with the tar and feathers.

And what the hell has our society become lately anyways? Women have done nothing in the past years but degrade, discredit, and abuse the child support system. Thus the good old paternity test is now mandatory. What they just require it now because it sounded good? LOL Nah it proved now that women are disgusting peanut butter legs that cant keep their legs closed to the whole public. As a woman myself I think its repulsive that some Jerry Springer slob has to have five guys tested cause she cant remember who the hell poked her. And the bigger problem is…. That it’s not just the Jerry Springer show, its happening in courts all over the country every day. Yuck yuck yuck. The decline in virtue, modesty, and a monogamous relationship is GONE. And what a pity, we are not advancing in society we are reverting back to the chimp days.

Oh and of course my most favorite. A man paying support for the six years and then finds out his wife had an affair and the kid is not his and yet he still has to pay. This makes me the sickest. He should be able to sue his wife. Have her arrested and thrown in jail for perjury. Make her pay some kind of consequence for being an adulteress whore. The good old Scarlett letter works for me, then again it would probably become some new fashion statement (please pass the midol)

Listen amazil if your choice is not to visit or see the child make sure it is uninhibited by your guilt, your wife, or kids. This decision has to be yours and only yours.
Don’t expect to walk back into this child's life four years from now. You have to live with the consequences as your are now and no one else.

 

[brisgirl825]

ahh my favorite topic, so glad I had a few minutes to check out the forum. Besides PMS can be a rather good thing . You people are coming down way to hard on this man. Don’t give me this sh#t about being a parent is not a choice. Mothers have all the choices and men have none. And lets drop this condom thing again because there’s no way your going to convince me that you all are Virgin Marys... there is no immaculate conception.

The man doesn’t WANT to be a father. SO WHAT! Sure it would be awful if he already had a relationship with the child and then walked out. Come on, how many people are on here blatting that their husbands traded them in and hasn’t paid a dime or seen the kids since the birth of Christ. Give me a break there nothing lost if the man was never there to start with.There plenty of decent people out there who have been raised with NO parents yet survive, live healthy constructive lives. A woman can walk into a abortion clinic and opt to kill her kid, yet when a man stands up and says "I don’t want to be a father" You all are out there with the tar and feathers.

And what the hell has our society become lately anyways? Women have done nothing in the past years but degrade, discredit, and abuse the child support system. Thus the good old paternity test is now mandatory. What they just require it now because it sounded good? LOL Nah it proved now that women are disgusting peanut butter legs that cant keep their legs closed to the whole public. As a woman myself I think its repulsive that some Jerry Springer slob has to have five guys tested cause she cant remember who the hell poked her. And the bigger problem is…. That it’s not just the Jerry Springer show, its happening in courts all over the country every day. Yuck yuck yuck. The decline in virtue, modesty, and a monogamous relationship is GONE. And what a pity, we are not advancing in society we are reverting back to the chimp days.

Oh and of course my most favorite. A man paying support for the six years and then finds out his wife had an affair and the kid is not his and yet he still has to pay. This makes me the sickest. He should be able to sue his wife. Have her arrested and thrown in jail for perjury. Make her pay some kind of consequence for being an adulteress whore. The good old Scarlett letter works for me, then again it would probably become some new fashion statement (please pass the midol)

Listen amazil if your choice is not to visit or see the child make sure it is uninhibited by your guilt, your wife, or kids. This decision has to be yours and only yours.
Don’t expect to walk back into this child's life four years from now. You have to live with the consequences as your are now and no one else.

Men fu*k up kids just as much as women do. Being a bad parent is an equal opprotunity trait.
This guy will be back, when his wife leaves him. He'll decide that he doesn't want to pay for a kid he can't see. So the poor kid will have to have his/her life turned upside down and be forced to be around a guy he/she doesn't know.
Really, it's sad and both parents are too blame as well as the wife. It's heartbreaking that a child can be thrown away so easily. All in order to save a marriage that was on the rocks anyway, or else husband of the year here wouldn't have had an affair.

 

[amazil]

I know my husband did wrong but my husband and I do not want any part of that child's life. This is one of life's trial and tribulations and I'm sure a **** load of people have been in and thru this situation. My husband and I do understand that if the court orders him to pay child support (if he is the biodad), he WILL pay, since it was his **** up. So why don't you give me and him props for supporting that child! My husband can't support my two kids and that child with his income, and that is why I am helping him with my income. And I love my husband to death, for your useless information! But we do not want to be any part of the child's life. That child was a mistake, and that is why we have laws to terminate parental rights. It's his choice! So why don't you stop batting him and me down! You are not giving us advice! Which this is a free advice forum. It's like you are trying to make our decisions for us?!?!?! WTF! And another useless information for you, I WILL NOT leave my husband, he is the love of my life. People make mistakes, and nobody is perfect! So don't come around telling me and my husband that we're bad people. The female is just as bad as my husband, by not knowing who the biodad is!

Men fu*k up kids just as much as women do. Being a bad parent is an equal opprotunity trait.
This guy will be back, when his wife leaves him. He'll decide that he doesn't want to pay for a kid he can't see. So the poor kid will have to have his/her life turned upside down and be forced to be around a guy he/she doesn't know.
Really, it's sad and both parents are too blame as well as the wife. It's heartbreaking that a child can be thrown away so easily. All in order to save a marriage that was on the rocks anyway, or else husband of the year here wouldn't have had an affair.

 

[brisgirl825]

I know my husband did wrong but my husband and I do not want any part of that child's life. This is one of life's trial and tribulations and I'm sure a **** load of people have been in and thru this situation. My husband and I do understand that if the court orders him to pay child support (if he is the biodad), he WILL pay, since it was his **** up. So why don't you give me and him props for supporting that child! My husband can't support my two kids and that child with his income, and that is why I am helping him with my income. And I love my husband to death, for your useless information! But we do not want to be any part of the child's life. That child was a mistake, and that is why we have laws to terminate parental rights. It's his choice! So why don't you stop batting him and me down! You are not giving us advice! Which this is a free advice forum. It's like you are trying to make our decisions for us?!?!?! WTF! And another useless information for you, I WILL NOT leave my husband, he is the love of my life. People make mistakes, and nobody is perfect! So don't come around telling me and my husband that we're bad people. The female is just as bad as my husband, by not knowing who the biodad is!

The fact that you got on here and had to get involved in your husband's online conversations just proves that he is pussy whipped. I have no doubt that you are pressuring him into not seeing his child.
You're bitter, jealous, angry, and resentful. Instead of putting the blame on your husband for cheating on you, you're taking out on the child. I wonder how you would feel if your kids were the ones being treated like $hit.
So go on with your bad self, keep telling the board what a good husband and dad he is and how perfect your marriage is. One here is going to believe your bs.
Now get back to screwing your husband, b/c obviously you weren't doing it correctly before.

 

[amazil]

Like I said nobody is perfect! Nobody in this damn world is perfect! And I didn't know there was anything called termination of parental rights until my husband told me about it! Because he is the one who wants this! And I never said he was a good husband, cos if he was he wouldn't have cheated on me. And I never said that our marriage is perfect, because nobody's perfect! And the reason why he cheated on me was because I was a minor at the time before we got married and my parents put a no contact order on us, he was going crazy that he couldn't see me and gave into temptation. Because he's a stupid ass and I'll say it! And he will admit that he is an ass! He is an ignorant ass, once again, nobody in this world is perfect. So don't come around telling me how we people are. Men are dogs, and I'm sure a man out there will agree that men are dogs.

The fact that you got on here and had to get involved in your husband's online conversations just proves that he is pussy whipped. I have no doubt that you are pressuring him into not seeing his child.
You're bitter, jealous, angry, and resentful. Instead of putting the blame on your husband for cheating on you, you're taking out on the child. I wonder how you would feel if your kids were the ones being treated like $hit.
So go on with your bad self, keep telling the board what a good husband and dad he is and how perfect your marriage is. One here is going to believe your bs.
Now get back to screwing your husband, b/c obviously you weren't doing it correctly before.

 

[amazil]

And we're not sure that he is the father! And I'm not pressuring him to put a TPR. He decided this on his own, he don't want to see the child. He has a mind of his own, and I'm sure he can use it! Now, I'm going to return this thread to my husband so he can deal with his **** up! He's the one who's looking for information on this ****, because I told him it's not my problem, it's his! I'd help him pay CS IF he is the biodad. But he don't want any part of that child's life.

The fact that you got on here and had to get involved in your husband's online conversations just proves that he is pussy whipped. I have no doubt that you are pressuring him into not seeing his child.
You're bitter, jealous, angry, and resentful. Instead of putting the blame on your husband for cheating on you, you're taking out on the child. I wonder how you would feel if your kids were the ones being treated like $hit.
So go on with your bad self, keep telling the board what a good husband and dad he is and how perfect your marriage is. One here is going to believe your bs.
Now get back to screwing your husband, b/c obviously you weren't doing it correctly before.

 

[brisgirl825]

Wow and he's a pedophile too! No wonder your attitude is so juvenile. How old are you now? 18?
You're young; grow up and move on.

 

[amazil]

She's 19. Back where my wife and I come from (the marianas islands) our law does not get involved with age difference. So we didn't know! I am not a pedophile. Can you please stop battering us??? I am looking for advice, not trouble.

Wow and he's a pedophile too! No wonder your attitude is so juvenile. How old are you now? 18?
You're young; grow up and move on.

 

[brisgirl825]

She's 19. Back where my wife and I come from (the marianas islands) our law does not get involved with age difference. So we didn't know! I am not a pedophile. Can you please stop battering us??? I am looking for advice, not trouble.

Ok so why was there a no contact order? And you got legal advice. You can't give up your rights w/o mom's consent.

 

[genivieve]

Now get back to screwing your husband, b/c obviously you weren't doing it correctly before.

Lol this is coming from a so called woman who of all the people in the world to reproduce with, she picks a retarded truck driver. Who in fact doesnt want his kids, and pawns them off on hubby #2 for TPR. Oh and during a divorce decides that she should move in with hubby #1's mother and then tell dear old mommy in law that her own son can not come to the house. LOL> Please tell us, were you in fact giving your husband good sex? Oh and more stones to throw, please read her past posts to where she was telling people to stop picking on her in this forum, and she is asking only for legal advice not verbal harrassment. Yet she does it now to new posters. The irony is so thick.........................