GraysonKelly
Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? West Virginia
Hi,
I realize that this post may upset some people but I really don't mean to. I'm going to try to explain this as fully as I can so that you kind people out there might be able to offer some kind of advice or wisdom. I'd like to preface this by saying that I, in no way, mean to disparage fathers out there and will admit that I only know one and half sides of this issue. I'd also like to say that I'm only asking these questions because I'm worried about the little girl.
First, I am the child's aunt. The child is almost 18 months old. Here's the story. I realize that a lot of the verbal agreements are irrelevant but in order to get the whole picture I'm going to tell it as it has been told to me.
A little over two years ago, my sister got pregnant by her then boyfriend. At the beginning of her second trimester, the boyfriend moved into her house while still maintaining his own house. At the end of her second trimester he left her. He would not contribute either time nor money to supporting either my sister, himself (my sister essentially kept him) and told my sister that he would not assist her in caring for the baby. My sister, not being able to afford living where she was at the time, told him that she thought it would be best if all of them went back to WV where she could better afford to support them (herself, the baby, and him) and have the support of her family as well. He left her not long after she had suggested that. My sister, alone and 6 months pregnant went ahead and planned to move back to WV. For two months after their separation, she attempted to get him to sit down with her and talk about how and when he would see the baby and how he would help support them if he could. He never told her anything. He rarely returned her calls and when he did, he was abusive. The week before she moved, she asked him one last time to meet her and discuss his plan to be involved with his daughter. He would not meet her face to face so over the phone he asked her what she wanted. She told him that since he hadn't answered her in two months since they broke up and didn't seem interested in coming up with a plan that he could just walk away if he wanted to. He initially verbally abused her, calling her names and such, then asked her if he would be dragged into court or responsible financially if he walked. She told him that he would be completely off the hook and he agreed then hung up on her.
When the baby was born, she sent a message to him telling him. Two weeks after that, he called and asked about the baby. Asked her consider letting him visit. The day after that he sent her an email telling her that he'd changed his mind and the he would stay away and not to send any pictures or information about the baby either to him or anyone in his family. My sis responded by email telling him that was fine with her. After that there was a string of abusive, harrassing, threatening emails. He claimed to love his daughter but never attempted to work a time to come meet my sister to discuss it. My sister begged him to leave her alone, stop emailing and stop calling at all hours harrassing her and he just got more abusive. Finally, she told him in an email that unless he came up with a concrete plan of not only visitation but also monetary support and stopped his name calling and abusive language she would not respond to his emails. Eight months went by with no emails but a constant barrage of calls. He never sent cards, presents, merry christmas messages, nothing to his daughter. He never even sent her a card for her birthday.
Now he is taking my sister to court for the right of visitation. My question is, since he hasn't been there for the last 18 months and has proven to be abusive, irresponsible and inconsistent and has threatened my sister with coming "take the baby" is it feasible that my sister can get his rights severed? She knows now that she made a mistake in not asking him to do so earlier. My sister is worried that this man is not a good person to have in her daughter's life because of his behavior. My sister does have knowledge of how he has mistreated other children in his life (family's kids) and has reason to fear that he would be no different with my niece.
I understand that legally he has a right to her if only because of biology, but can my sister reasonably expect to get his rights severed? Or if not, can she respectfully request that he go throught counselling and parenting classes and supervised visitation in WV before he would ever be allowed to be alone with her or take her out of state?
Thanks
Hi,
I realize that this post may upset some people but I really don't mean to. I'm going to try to explain this as fully as I can so that you kind people out there might be able to offer some kind of advice or wisdom. I'd like to preface this by saying that I, in no way, mean to disparage fathers out there and will admit that I only know one and half sides of this issue. I'd also like to say that I'm only asking these questions because I'm worried about the little girl.
First, I am the child's aunt. The child is almost 18 months old. Here's the story. I realize that a lot of the verbal agreements are irrelevant but in order to get the whole picture I'm going to tell it as it has been told to me.
A little over two years ago, my sister got pregnant by her then boyfriend. At the beginning of her second trimester, the boyfriend moved into her house while still maintaining his own house. At the end of her second trimester he left her. He would not contribute either time nor money to supporting either my sister, himself (my sister essentially kept him) and told my sister that he would not assist her in caring for the baby. My sister, not being able to afford living where she was at the time, told him that she thought it would be best if all of them went back to WV where she could better afford to support them (herself, the baby, and him) and have the support of her family as well. He left her not long after she had suggested that. My sister, alone and 6 months pregnant went ahead and planned to move back to WV. For two months after their separation, she attempted to get him to sit down with her and talk about how and when he would see the baby and how he would help support them if he could. He never told her anything. He rarely returned her calls and when he did, he was abusive. The week before she moved, she asked him one last time to meet her and discuss his plan to be involved with his daughter. He would not meet her face to face so over the phone he asked her what she wanted. She told him that since he hadn't answered her in two months since they broke up and didn't seem interested in coming up with a plan that he could just walk away if he wanted to. He initially verbally abused her, calling her names and such, then asked her if he would be dragged into court or responsible financially if he walked. She told him that he would be completely off the hook and he agreed then hung up on her.
When the baby was born, she sent a message to him telling him. Two weeks after that, he called and asked about the baby. Asked her consider letting him visit. The day after that he sent her an email telling her that he'd changed his mind and the he would stay away and not to send any pictures or information about the baby either to him or anyone in his family. My sis responded by email telling him that was fine with her. After that there was a string of abusive, harrassing, threatening emails. He claimed to love his daughter but never attempted to work a time to come meet my sister to discuss it. My sister begged him to leave her alone, stop emailing and stop calling at all hours harrassing her and he just got more abusive. Finally, she told him in an email that unless he came up with a concrete plan of not only visitation but also monetary support and stopped his name calling and abusive language she would not respond to his emails. Eight months went by with no emails but a constant barrage of calls. He never sent cards, presents, merry christmas messages, nothing to his daughter. He never even sent her a card for her birthday.
Now he is taking my sister to court for the right of visitation. My question is, since he hasn't been there for the last 18 months and has proven to be abusive, irresponsible and inconsistent and has threatened my sister with coming "take the baby" is it feasible that my sister can get his rights severed? She knows now that she made a mistake in not asking him to do so earlier. My sister is worried that this man is not a good person to have in her daughter's life because of his behavior. My sister does have knowledge of how he has mistreated other children in his life (family's kids) and has reason to fear that he would be no different with my niece.
I understand that legally he has a right to her if only because of biology, but can my sister reasonably expect to get his rights severed? Or if not, can she respectfully request that he go throught counselling and parenting classes and supervised visitation in WV before he would ever be allowed to be alone with her or take her out of state?
Thanks