enough to reverse custody?

[stealth2]

I posted on here wanting some answers, but all I get is a discussion about cheesecake and wine. Thank you. I pray that when you find yourself needing some help, someone takes the time to mock you. Lord knows you all are perfect.

This isn't complicated - who are you in this situation? We'll move on from there.

 

[Proserpina]

This isn't complicated - who are you in this situation? We'll move on from there.

It really IS that simple, OP.

(and yes, it can make a difference in the legalities)

 

[ecmst12]

In the first post, OP said he was dad.

I really hope the "we" refers to him and his lawyer.

 

[Ohiogal]

I posted on here wanting some answers, but all I get is a discussion about cheesecake and wine. Thank you. I pray that when you find yourself needing some help, someone takes the time to mock you. Lord knows you all are perfect.

Why don't you answer the question as to WHO WE is. You used we. So who is WE?

 

[Ohiogal]

In the first post, OP said he was dad.

I really hope the "we" refers to him and his lawyer.

I hope so as well. But many times it does not.

 

[johnsons]

"We" is my attorney

The "we" I referred to was someone that suggested my particular attorney. Sorry to make that confusing. A friend had used this attorney for his custody battle and liked the work he did, so when I had need of one, this is who he (my friend) brought up.

Yes, I am the dad. Refresher: have joint legal custody. Court ordered, specified visits of every other weekend, Labor Day, and 4 weeks vacation during the summer. No visits since July 5th. Ex first stated that she was holding our son because of emotional abuse, which was unfounded by DHS, the therapist our son has been seeing for a year, and the pediatrician our son has seen for 9 years. Now she's changing it to "he doesn't want to". Well, he doesn't want to diet (weighs 170 and only 4ft, 8 in tall), doesn't read (though 2 years behind in reading level according to IEP at school, etc.

She's not parenting him....she's trying to be his "friend", and I'm so tired of her saying "I will", when she never does!

With holding visits for 6 months, refusal to see nutritionist that dr ordered, and the refusal to follow through with diabetes testing dr ordered 6 months ago (son has high blood sugar, think he has Type II diabetes, and diabetes runs in my family. two independant drs ordered this, and ex still refuses to comply), and ex actually told attorney during deposition that "there's nothing wrong with my son. He's fine"!

What kind of punishment (not sure of proper word to use here) is she facing for the constant contempt of court order? Any chance we can reverse custody?

 

[TheGeekess]

So why haven't you made the appointments with the doctors and checked Son out of school to take care of his health issues?

 

[johnsons]

List of appointments

First of all, I get my son from 6pm on Friday until 6pm on Sunday. The doctors are closed. Second, I have made SEVERAL appointments for my son, notified ex of them, she agrees to go, I show up, and she no call/no shows. I even got him into a specialized program that deals both with his physical and mental well being- a therapist and doctor work side by side. She let me take our son to one appointment, and when it was advised our son be on medication and further testing done for his diabetes, she ceased all communication and stopped all further visits.

Obviously, I cannot take him if I do not even see him- hence, part of the problem! I have stated from day one that if she does not want to or cannot take him to an appointment, then I will happily leave work early to take him. I even take the time to research doctors near her (she's an hour away from me) that take both my insurance AND her medical card so that she doesn't have to pay an up-front co-pay.

I am TRYING to get him the help he needs, but when I say "do it or I'll force the issue in court"- she filed false DHS report and this whole mess started.

(And before anyone thinks I'm just mean to my ex- I happen to get along with my wife's ex very well. I think that just because my ex and I didn't work out is no reason our son should have to pay the price, though she's not seeing it that way. The more I move on, the worse she's getting).

 

[TheGeekess]

Read a little slower....

So why haven't you made the appointments with the doctors and checked Son out of school to take care of his health issues?

 

[johnsons]

not sure how that pertains to original question

My attorney has advised against that, as I have specific visitation set aside in our court order. He said that to check my son out of school against the mother's consent/knowledge could cause more problems in the custody end of the situation. Since it is not an emergency situation, he felt that we should let the judge handle the issue of either forcing her to take our son or allowing me to take him out of school to take him. I do not know the law, so I am following my attorney's advice. At this point, we just have to push the contempt charge and file for modification of custody. Which is why my original question was, and still is, what are the chances it will be overturned based on all info?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Your best bet may be to have the judge/referee/whoever order that you are allowed to take the child to the doctor and counseling.

 

[Proserpina]

My attorney has advised against that, as I have specific visitation set aside in our court order. He said that to check my son out of school against the mother's consent/knowledge could cause more problems in the custody end of the situation. Since it is not an emergency situation, he felt that we should let the judge handle the issue of either forcing her to take our son or allowing me to take him out of school to take him. I do not know the law, so I am following my attorney's advice. At this point, we just have to push the contempt charge and file for modification of custody. Which is why my original question was, and still is, what are the chances it will be overturned based on all info?

Quick question - how do you know he has high blood sugar?

 

[johnsons]

full work up first week of june

He (my son) had a full blood work up the first week of June because I yelled at the ex about my son's weight so much that she gave in and went to dr. The Dr ordered full work-up, and came back high sugar. Enough that he then ordered the 4 hour fasting type that you do while pregnant (guessing it's the same), but it never happened.

The only dr appointment I was able to take him to before ex stopped visits was to an independant dr, and his bloodwork showed same thing- and he ordered same test, not knowing other drs orders. So I told ex that my dr had ordered same thing and it needed to be done, especially since diabetes runs in my family. 6 months later....still waiting for test to be done.

 

[Proserpina]

He (my son) had a full blood work up the first week of June because I yelled at the ex about my son's weight so much that she gave in and went to dr. The Dr ordered full work-up, and came back high sugar. Enough that he then ordered the 4 hour fasting type that you do while pregnant (guessing it's the same), but it never happened.

The only dr appointment I was able to take him to before ex stopped visits was to an independant dr, and his bloodwork showed same thing- and he ordered same test, not knowing other drs orders. So I told ex that my dr had ordered same thing and it needed to be done, especially since diabetes runs in my family. 6 months later....still waiting for test to be done.

One high blood sugar reading is not diagnostic of diabetes - but if you really want to check, there are meters and strips available without a prescription. At least that way you may have something solid to present.

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

One high blood sugar reading is not diagnostic of diabetes - but if you really want to check, there are meters and strips available without a prescription. At least that way you may have something solid to present.

Not only that but you can now purchase an over the counter A1C test at most pharmacy's that will tell you what his over average blood sugars for the last month have been. These are also very useful and give you a better idea than one or two blood checks. You just have to mail it out to lab but you can do it in the privacy of own home. If he does have high blood sugars they would then need to decide if it is Type 1 or type 2 diabetes and this really is not something you should have waited 6 months to throw a fit about. This should have been dealt with right away.