What consequences could i face?

[askingforhelp]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? kc, mo

I am leaving this month to go see my bf in texas and then we are driving from there to his home in miami. I don't know when I'll be back to missouri. I have visitation with my kids every other weekend. I am leaving the wednesday before my weekend, so I won't be here to get them on my weekend, and don't know for sure when I'll be back. How will this effect my case if it goes back to court? I just want to know what I'm getting into for leaving for awhile, but I will be back to see them again.

Eta: Also, can my mom pick them up and take them the weekends that are mine so i'm not giving up my weekends?

 

[CJane]

You risk disappointing your children.
You risk being seen as choosing your BF over your children.
You risk - depending on how long you're gone - having your visitation restricted.


Have you TOLD anyone (the kids, the NCP) that you're leaving for an indefinite amount of time?

Your mother cannot exercise your visitation for you.

 

[Silverplum]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? kc, mo

I am leaving this month to go see my bf in texas and then we are driving from there to his home in miami. I don't know when I'll be back to missouri. I have visitation with my kids every other weekend. I am leaving the wednesday before my weekend, so I won't be here to get them on my weekend, and don't know for sure when I'll be back. How will this effect my case if it goes back to court? I just want to know what I'm getting into for leaving for awhile, but I will be back to see them again.

Eta: Also, can my mom pick them up and take them the weekends that are mine so i'm not giving up my weekends?

Visitation is a RIGHT, not an obligation. You can skip it, if you choose. It would be more than reasonable and responsible to discuss this with your X before you take off.

But your parenting time (visitation) is not transferrable. Not even to Grandma, unless Dad agrees.

 

[Silverplum]

Why did you post on another's thread that you had full custody -- then delete it?

 

[askingforhelp]

Visitation is a RIGHT, not an obligation. You can skip it, if you choose. It would be more than reasonable and responsible to discuss this with your X before you take off.

But your parenting time (visitation) is not transferrable. Not even to Grandma, unless Dad agrees.

I cannot tell my ex I'm leaving, he will try to prevent me from going.

If I don't tell my ex I am leaving, can't grandma pick up my kids as if I was still here? Because she picks them up on my weekends for me anyways?

I just don't want me leaving to cost me my visitation with my kids when I come back.

 

[Silverplum]

I cannot tell my ex I'm leaving, he will try to prevent me from going.

He can't.

If I don't tell my ex I am leaving, can't grandma pick up my kids as if I was still here? Because she picks them up on my weekends for me anyways?

We're not EVER going to help you skirt the law.
The answer is NO.

I just don't want me leaving to cost me my visitation with my kids when I come back.

Whatever.

 

[Just Blue]

Read the other threads folks....

 

[mommyof4]

So, you were just asking about how to get more time with your daughters (including a question about a possible scheme to go to church and to volunteer to show how deserving of custody you truly are...) and NOW you are going to just up and go cross country with your boyfriend for heaven knows how long without even bothering to drop a note to Dad or your kids? Don't you think your girls might just wonder where you are why you decided to have nothing more to do with them?

Yeah, yeah...you say you will come back and visit them later, but in the meantime, think about what your little girls will think and feel.

What about your job you started in September? Or have you decided not to work, therefore having no means to even pay the CS you have been ordered to pay?

Is there some legitimate reason you can't apply common sense to your life?

Legally, you can go where you want, when you want. That's not an issue. What IS an issue is the impact your actions are going to have on your children.

No, your mother CANNOT exercise your visitation in your place. (as you have been repeatedly told).

I have to say that your actions are screaming that you only care about your children when it is convenient for you to do so and that YOUR wants come way before your children's. Not exactly a sterling example of exemplary parenthood.

 

[askingforhelp]

you all do not know what i have been put through and what i continue to go through so what you are saying about who i am is very low. i have a life and my kids i only get on some weekends, so i cant throw my life away i have to move on and thats what im trying to do. i can only do so much because of my court order and until i can change that, i have to live my life. you dont know what i have gone through with all this!

 

[mommyof4]

you all do not know what i have been put through and what i continue to go through so what you are saying about who i am is very low. i have a life and my kids i only get on some weekends, so i cant throw my life away i have to move on and thats what im trying to do. i can only do so much because of my court order and until i can change that, i have to live my life. you dont know what i have gone through with all this!

Your sob story is irrelevant. You have two children. THEY are the priority, not your bruised psyche. Moving on does not mean leaving your children. All you are doing is reinforcing that the court's decision to deny you custody (ANY custody...not even the right to have a say in decisions concerning them) was the right decision.

Grow up.

 

[Antigone*]

So, you were just asking about how to get more time with your daughters (including a question about a possible scheme to go to church and to volunteer to show how deserving of custody you truly are...) and NOW you are going to just up and go cross country with your boyfriend for heaven knows how long without even bothering to drop a note to Dad or your kids? Don't you think your girls might just wonder where you are why you decided to have nothing more to do with them?

Yeah, yeah...you say you will come back and visit them later, but in the meantime, think about what your little girls will think and feel.

What about your job you started in September? Or have you decided not to work, therefore having no means to even pay the CS you have been ordered to pay?

Is there some legitimate reason you can't apply common sense to your life?

Legally, you can go where you want, when you want. That's not an issue. What IS an issue is the impact your actions are going to have on your children.

No, your mother CANNOT exercise your visitation in your place. (as you have been repeatedly told).

I have to say that your actions are screaming that you only care about your children when it is convenient for you to do so and that YOUR wants come way before your children's. Not exactly a sterling example of exemplary parenthood.

Come on you guys....can't you see it...it is as plain as the pimple on my nose!!!

Church is in Texas and Miami

 

[mommyof4]

Come on you guys....can't you see it...it is as plain as the pimple on my nose!!!

Church is in Texas and Miami

Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition.....

 

[2Mistakes]

Holy hell almighty!

This OP could be my ex-wife. Seriously. The last time she decided to chase boyfriend to MI, she didn't tell the kids. She emailed my wife AFTER she got to MI and TOLD my wife to let the kids know that she wouldn't be seeing them for awhile.

OP, you want to know what running off will do to your kids? I've got 3 of them, and their mom does this kind of crap to them 2 - 3 times per year.

At first, it would really upset them. They would cry that they missed mommy. It was absolutely heart-breaking.

Now? They would rather not have anything to do with her. The 15 year old has said flat out that their mom only wants to be "mom" when it's convenient for her, or she's going to get something out of it.

Pull this kind of crap on your kids too many times, and when they can legally cut contact with you, they will. Mark my words. I still have to force my kids to see their mom (on the rare occasions that she even wants them for her visitation), and the 2 oldest have said that once they turn 18, they're done.

And that's just really sad. Sad for the kids. They have a great relationship with their step-mom (my wife), but she will never be their mom.

So that's what you risk. Is it worth it to you?

 

[Just Blue]

you all do not know what i have been put through and what i continue to go through so what you are saying about who i am is very low. i have a life and my kids i only get on some weekends, so i cant throw my life away i have to move on and thats what im trying to do. i can only do so much because of my court order and until i can change that, i have to live my life. you dont know what i have gone through with all this!

We only know whay YOU posted about yourself...

BTW: What YOU are doing to YOUR CHILDREN is low. Grow up.

 

[momofrose]

you all do not know what i have been put through and what i continue to go through so what you are saying about who i am is very low. i have a life and my kids i only get on some weekends, so i cant throw my life away i have to move on and thats what im trying to do. i can only do so much because of my court order and until i can change that, i have to live my life. you dont know what i have gone through with all this!

You know I gotta tell you - this post says WORLDS about you! I too was an NCP mom after a very bloody custody battle (which I ended by agreeing to take the NCP role). I worked and worked for years - I showed up for every day I had the right to, I was an active parent in her school and extra ciricular activies and everything I could possibly do on "my time" - she was only 3 then. I initially only had EOW and dinner's and 2 weeks in the summer. 3 or 4 years ago - I petioned the court and was awarded shared custody...why? Because i did not let my ex or the court's ruling take my mommy role away. it may have been limited, but I did everything I could under those limitations.

the fact that you would throw in the towel becasue things have been rough on you SUCKS. Your problems are NOT your kids fault. If you boyfriend means that much to you - tell him to come up and visit you so you can see your kids!!!