Absolutely frustrated and could use some opinions...

[Raisingmaddy]

What is the name of your state - Washington

Ok, I have three children, joint legal custody with ex and I am Primary provider. Not sure if all of this info is pertinent, but I will give it just in case...

Children see dad two weekends per month, two weeks out of each summer month and rotating holidays and dad lives approx. five hours away now.

Ex's parents live in the same town I live in with the children. Before I ask my question I would like detail some of the issues with grandparents.

Grandparents are absolutely, horribly vile to me. They make it very obvious to me and to the children that they favor ONE child over the others to the point that every time they come home from a visit two of the children are devastated. Every single time the grandparents call to ask for a visit they ONLY ask for the one child they favor to to come and spend time with them, and spoil her rotten above and beyond...and they always tell the other children they will pick them up next time, but that NEVER happens. There is so much more and two of my kids are really hurting right now.

In addition to that, every time I do send one of the kiddos over there the grandparents instigate ridiculous, petty issues with my ex and I...so I end up with a nasty phone call/threat from my ex because "what his parents said one of our kids said".

It's not that I want to keep the kids from seeing them, but it's gotten to the point that I don't think it's healthy for any of them.

My question is could ex get custody changed or cause any significant issues if I no longer send this kids to see his parents during my parenting time? They would of course still get to see them when their dad takes them there on his time.

Please let me know your opinions/thoughts/suggestions...Thanks!

 

[Antigone*]

What is the name of your state - Washington

Ok, I have three children, joint legal custody with ex and I am Primary provider. Not sure if all of this info is pertinent, but I will give it just in case...

Children see dad two weekends per month, two weeks out of each summer month and rotating holidays and dad lives approx. five hours away now.

Ex's parents live in the same town I live in with the children. Before I ask my question I would like detail some of the issues with grandparents.

Grandparents are absolutely, horribly vile to me. They make it very obvious to me and to the children that they favor ONE child over the others to the point that every time they come home from a visit two of the children are devastated. Every single time the grandparents call to ask for a visit they ONLY ask for the one child they favor to to come and spend time with them, and spoil her rotten above and beyond...and they always tell the other children they will pick them up next time, but that NEVER happens. There is so much more and two of my kids are really hurting right now.

In addition to that, every time I do send one of the kiddos over there the grandparents instigate ridiculous, petty issues with my ex and I...so I end up with a nasty phone call/threat from my ex because "what his parents said one of our kids said".

It's not that I want to keep the kids from seeing them, but it's gotten to the point that I don't think it's healthy for any of them.

My question is could ex get custody changed or cause any significant issues if I no longer send this kids to see his parents during my parenting time? They would of course still get to see them when their dad takes them there on his time.

Please let me know your opinions/thoughts/suggestions...Thanks!

Are the kids going over there during your parenting time or his?

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

Im assuming there is no order that says grandparents get visitation. No you are not required to send them to grandparents as you said if he wants them to see them he can do so on his time. And I would never allow my kids grandparents to take just one unless the evenly took different one each time.

 

[TheGeekess]

You have been extremely generous to your ex's family. Time to put a stop to it and let your ex deal with them on his time.

 

[Isis1]

okay, you asked for an opinion...here's mine.

don't send kiddos to grandparent's house anymore. they can visit on dad's time.

and i have to say, that REALLY chaps my hide when a grandparent favors one child over the other. my father in law started that. dad and myself had to set him straight on that. if he's going to give candy to one, he has to have one for both. little stuff like that.

i was a favorite grandchild, it sure didn't feel nice to know my grandma didn't like my sister all that much. still bugs me to this day.

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state - Washington

Ok, I have three children, joint legal custody with ex and I am Primary provider. Not sure if all of this info is pertinent, but I will give it just in case...

Children see dad two weekends per month, two weeks out of each summer month and rotating holidays and dad lives approx. five hours away now.

Ex's parents live in the same town I live in with the children. Before I ask my question I would like detail some of the issues with grandparents.

Grandparents are absolutely, horribly vile to me. They make it very obvious to me and to the children that they favor ONE child over the others to the point that every time they come home from a visit two of the children are devastated. Every single time the grandparents call to ask for a visit they ONLY ask for the one child they favor to to come and spend time with them, and spoil her rotten above and beyond...and they always tell the other children they will pick them up next time, but that NEVER happens. There is so much more and two of my kids are really hurting right now.

In addition to that, every time I do send one of the kiddos over there the grandparents instigate ridiculous, petty issues with my ex and I...so I end up with a nasty phone call/threat from my ex because "what his parents said one of our kids said".

It's not that I want to keep the kids from seeing them, but it's gotten to the point that I don't think it's healthy for any of them.

My question is could ex get custody changed or cause any significant issues if I no longer send this kids to see his parents during my parenting time? They would of course still get to see them when their dad takes them there on his time.

Please let me know your opinions/thoughts/suggestions...Thanks!

Your parenting time is yours - you are free to allow and/or disallow visitation from or to anyone at all unless there is a court order saying otherwise. It's entirely up to you; Dad is free to have the grandparents visit the children during his parenting time or make alternate arrangements.

 

[Raisingmaddy]

Are the kids going over there during your parenting time or his?

I have been sending them on my parenting time and wish to not do so anymore.

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

So dont

 

[Antigone*]

I have been sending them on my parenting time and wish to not do so anymore.

You are not required to send the kids anywhere you don't feel like on your parenting time. Grandma and Grandpa can pound sand as far as you're concerned.

If they want to see the kids, then dad can make it happen on his time. It is his right.

 

[Raisingmaddy]

Thanks to everyone for the replys. I mentioned the possibility of this to ex and he has threatened legal action if I follow thru with it so I've been a little nervous, but I still think it's in the best interest of our kids.

 

[Isis1]

Thanks to everyone for the replys. I mentioned the possibility of this to ex and he has threatened legal action if I follow thru with it so I've been a little nervous, but I still think it's in the best interest of our kids.

LOL!!! LOL!!! LOL!!! your ex is funny.

 

[Proserpina]

This has to be one of the fastest resolutions to a multiple-answer threads ever!

(apparently a few of us have the knack of hitting "enter" simultaneously...)

 

[Isis1]

This has to be one of the fastest resolutions to a multiple-answer threads ever!

(apparently a few of us have the knack of hitting "enter" simultaneously...)

still on page one too!

 

[Proserpina]

Thanks to everyone for the replys. I mentioned the possibility of this to ex and he has threatened legal action if I follow thru with it so I've been a little nervous, but I still think it's in the best interest of our kids.

Oh let him bring it on. If he wants to throw away good money that's up to him (though I'd be happy to accept his donations if he insists on doing so...).

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

I had to add a smiley face because my post of So dont was to short lol