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Absolutely frustrated and could use some opinions...

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I would change that slightly "the judge stated that you may pick up the children on the Friday nights of dad's weekends."...instead of "the court order states".

I am only saying that because it doesn't appear certain that the judge reduced it to a written order.

I do agree that you should appeal the judge's ruling, but if he didn't make it a written order, there is nothing to appeal.
Absolutely agreed! Basically, he can appoint any person he wants to pick the children up on his time and he is appointing them. I get that, but they seem to think they now have actual "rights" to our children now and that is NOT the case.
 


AkersTile

Member
I would say that you should file an appeal and request a closed courtroom next time. I think you may also be able to file for change of judge based on personal knowledge of the parties but I'm not sure so I'm going to double check on that. The SRs would definitely know that one though.
 
I just want to thank all of you again, I REALLY appreciate all of your opinions, thoughts, and suggestions. It's helping already more than you know!
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Its an illegal order. The judge admitted that. The transcripts won't make any difference...at least not to the issue of whether or not she can appeal. The transcripts would help a great deal in the appeal itself however.

The judge allowed someone who was not a party to the suit, stand up and speak in the middle of a child support hearing, asking for third party visitation. There was no motion before the court, no due process, and nothing done according to proper legal procedure. On top of that the judge was a personal friend or acquaintance of the third party.

The appeals court would have a heyday with that one, but unfortunately its not appealable unless its reduced to a written order.
transcripts will be REQUIRED to appeal. The appeals court will want to be able to see the entire record.
 
So...in the meantime, I shouldn't have to worry about the threatening phone calls I am getting from them about requesting kiddos on my time correct? I do not even want to return the calls AT ALL. The judge did state that anytime the ex wants them to pick kiddos up on his weekend that HE has to inform me ahead of time and if he doesnt do that, I am not required to send them.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
I have been told, time and time again, that the court speaks through it's orders. If it's not in the order, it cannot be enforced.

For example, when I was in court when my X wouldn't hand over my daughter, the judge ORDERED both of us to find a way to get along. Is that written anywhere? Not. Now, the judge is ordering us to get along, but is that enforceable.

I would look to see what comes out of the written order.
 
I have been told, time and time again, that the court speaks through it's orders. If it's not in the order, it cannot be enforced.

For example, when I was in court when my X wouldn't hand over my daughter, the judge ORDERED both of us to find a way to get along. Is that written anywhere? Not. Now, the judge is ordering us to get along, but is that enforceable.

I would look to see what comes out of the written order.
Don't get me wrong, I agree with you but wouldn't a judge be super ticked if what he said wasn't followed and the other party brought it back in front of him because of it, and couldn't I get in some kind of trouble?
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
If all the judge really said was that he can appoint someone to pick up the child on HIS time, then, yes, it makes sense. If the judge ORDERED grandparent visitation without you having due process, then that is an APPEALLABLE court order.

So, who has to write up the order?
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
So...in the meantime, I shouldn't have to worry about the threatening phone calls I am getting from them about requesting kiddos on my time correct? I do not even want to return the calls AT ALL. The judge did state that anytime the ex wants them to pick kiddos up on his weekend that HE has to inform me ahead of time and if he doesnt do that, I am not required to send them.
No, you don't have to worry about the threatening phone calls at all if its about your time. And if the judge said that dad had to inform you if the gps were going to be picking up the children on his time then you also don't have to send them if he doesn't do that.
 

frylover

Senior Member
I have been told, time and time again, that the court speaks through it's orders. If it's not in the order, it cannot be enforced.

For example, when I was in court when my X wouldn't hand over my daughter, the judge ORDERED both of us to find a way to get along. Is that written anywhere? Not. Now, the judge is ordering us to get along, but is that enforceable.

I would look to see what comes out of the written order.
Tink, I just have to say something about this....

WHAT in the name of granny's drawers did the judge think YOU could have done to "get along" better, other than just let your ex keep your child???? Everytime you post that it makes me mad for YOU because I don't see where your ex left you any choice!
 
The grandparents left two more threatening messages for me again tonight, one on my home phone and one on my cell phone.

They stated that since I have not returned their calls (from last night) they are assuming I will not allow them to pick the kiddos up this week on my time. They made sure to state that they are "documenting" this and it will be used against me, among other things.

I have to assume they are going to take me to court on their own for grandparent visitation, are their grandparents rights in Washington? Either way, I'm at the point I want to contact the sheriffs department for harrassement, not sure if that is a good idea or not, what do you think?
 

tornado88

Member
Keep the messages. If you can, also make a paper copy of the messages. I know I have read on here where some people have been able to use them in court, but I'm unsure of the circumstances. Hopefully, someone else can answer that for you.

Please listen to the Sr. rather then me, but I would certainly look into getting a RO if these calls continue. I really doubt the GP have called you often enough yet to get one. I also think that if they seriously believe that they are in the right they will continue to call you and leave even more messages, thus giving you the additional evidence you would need.

I wouldn't worry about their threats of documenting your refusal to give them the children on your time. They are just documenting that you are following the court order. What harm is that going to do to you? None. The judge said he grandparents could pick up the children on Dad's Friday, not yours.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
The grandparents left two more threatening messages for me again tonight, one on my home phone and one on my cell phone.

They stated that since I have not returned their calls (from last night) they are assuming I will not allow them to pick the kiddos up this week on my time. They made sure to state that they are "documenting" this and it will be used against me, among other things.

I have to assume they are going to take me to court on their own for grandparent visitation, are their grandparents rights in Washington? Either way, I'm at the point I want to contact the sheriffs department for harrassement, not sure if that is a good idea or not, what do you think?
I am sorry that I didn't pick up on the fact that you are located in Washington state.

Now I am CERTAIN that the judge will not put that order in writing. Grandparent visitation is almost a dead issue in Washington state. The GPV statutes there have ruled unconstitutional twice (or even three times maybe) by the WA Supreme Court, and backed up by the USSC in Troxel vs Granville.

Let the grandparents threaten/document all they like. They can sue for visitation, but they have virtually no chance of winning if you handle the case right. If the judge does give them gpv and doesn't give you proper due process, then you can absolutely appeal and win on appeal.

That is why the judge threatened you like that. He knew that he couldn't rule in their favor if there was a proper motion before the court.

If the judge does put it in writing then come back here and tell us exactly what the order says.
 

gr8rn

Senior Member
Shouldn't she respond at least once to clarify to the grandparents that her understanding of what the judge said was that they could pick up child(ren) on the exes Friday and that it is her understanding that they are not allowed to pick up the child(ren) on her time, or just anytime they please?
 
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