Motion to add party? Ohiogal please help if you can! :)

[kik1999]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

Wow, I can't believe this is actually happening. I was worried a few years ago, but my own mother hasn't seen my daughter in about 3 years, so I stopped thinking that it might happen. History is I have a 13 year old daughter who I have SOLE custody of, since 2001. Her dad and I get along well, he was in the military when we divorced which is why I think I was given sole custody, but he has been very involved and even though we have had our moments, we have kept it out of court since our divorce. He used to live in Ohio, and we shared her 60/40 (me). He moved back down to North Carolina about 3 years ago.

I just received a notice that a motion hearing has been scheduled. When I pulled up the case details it says motion to add party (MY MOTHER) and motion to modify parental rights (MY MOTHER). Does she want some type of parental rights? Both my ex and I are ADAMANT about our daughter not having visitation with her, and our daughter has no interest in seeing her either. It's a long story, but my mother has already threatened me that she has more money than me and if I don't do what she wants, she will make sure a court orders me to....UGH!!! What should I be doing next? My ex is in town for the next few days (until Sunday) visiting our daughter. Should we file something together? Thank you in advance!!

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

Wow, I can't believe this is actually happening. I was worried a few years ago, but my own mother hasn't seen my daughter in about 3 years, so I stopped thinking that it might happen. History is I have a 13 year old daughter who I have SOLE custody of, since 2001. Her dad and I get along well, he was in the military when we divorced which is why I think I was given sole custody, but he has been very involved and even though we have had our moments, we have kept it out of court since our divorce. He used to live in Ohio, and we shared her 60/40 (me). He moved back down to North Carolina about 3 years ago.

I just received a notice that a motion hearing has been scheduled. When I pulled up the case details it says motion to add party (MY MOTHER) and motion to modify parental rights (MY MOTHER). Does she want some type of parental rights? Both my ex and I are ADAMANT about our daughter not having visitation with her, and our daughter has no interest in seeing her either. It's a long story, but my mother has already threatened me that she has more money than me and if I don't do what she wants, she will make sure a court orders me to....UGH!!! What should I be doing next? My ex is in town for the next few days (until Sunday) visiting our daughter. Should we file something together? Thank you in advance!!

Your mother is attempting to get court ordered visitation rights. In Ohio a gpv case must be part of a prior or ongoing proceeding regarding a child. That is why your mother is trying to add herself as a party to your divorce case.

There are best interests standards that a judge looks at in a gpv case. Those standards are as follows:

The court should consider factors including but not limited to the following:

•The geographical location of the grandparent's residence and the distance from the child’s residence
•The child’s and parents’ available time, including schedules for employment, school, holidays and vacations
•The child's age
•The child's adjustment at home and school and in the community
•Any wishes of the child, as expressed in chambers
•The child's health and safety
•The availability of time for the child to be with his or her siblings
•The mental and physical health of all parties
•The willingness of the grandparent to reschedule missed visitation
•Any conviction of the grandparent or guilty plea by the grandparent involving a crime of child abuse or child neglect
•The wishes and concerns of the parents as expressed to the court
•Any other factor in the best interest of the child.

Due to the fact that your child is a teenager, its highly likely that your child's wishes will factor heavily into a judge's decision as to whether or not to grant visitation to the grandparent. The important thing he is that you DO NOT agree to anything, in mediation or otherwise. You want the judge to be forced to rule on the merits of the case. This is also one instance where the child absolutely should be expressing her wishes to the judge.

You will need to respond to the suit (I assume you have been served). It would be best for you to have an attorney, but it needs to be an attorney who is experienced in fighting the parent's end of a gpv suit. In a gpv suit the having the wrong attorney can be worse than not having any attorney at all.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

Wow, I can't believe this is actually happening. I was worried a few years ago, but my own mother hasn't seen my daughter in about 3 years, so I stopped thinking that it might happen. History is I have a 13 year old daughter who I have SOLE custody of, since 2001. Her dad and I get along well, he was in the military when we divorced which is why I think I was given sole custody, but he has been very involved and even though we have had our moments, we have kept it out of court since our divorce. He used to live in Ohio, and we shared her 60/40 (me). He moved back down to North Carolina about 3 years ago.

I just received a notice that a motion hearing has been scheduled. When I pulled up the case details it says motion to add party (MY MOTHER) and motion to modify parental rights (MY MOTHER). Does she want some type of parental rights? Both my ex and I are ADAMANT about our daughter not having visitation with her, and our daughter has no interest in seeing her either. It's a long story, but my mother has already threatened me that she has more money than me and if I don't do what she wants, she will make sure a court orders me to....UGH!!! What should I be doing next? My ex is in town for the next few days (until Sunday) visiting our daughter. Should we file something together? Thank you in advance!!

Your mother is adding herself to the case to attempt to get visitation. While best interests come into play that is NOT until after there is a determination regarding whether or not you are unsuitable for a motion to modify parental rights (see in re perales). A motion to modify parental rights is not something she is entitled to as she is NOT a parent. She should have filed a motion for visitation. She didn't. Let us know when you AND your ex are both served. If you are not served with a copy of the complaint, you need to show up and protest that you were not properly served and that you are NOT waiving service defects. That is all you should state.

 

[kik1999]

Your mother is attempting to get court ordered visitation rights. In Ohio a gpv case must be part of a prior or ongoing proceeding regarding a child. That is why your mother is trying to add herself as a party to your divorce case.

There are best interests standards that a judge looks at in a gpv case. Those standards are as follows:

The court should consider factors including but not limited to the following:

•The geographical location of the grandparent's residence and the distance from the child’s residence
•The child’s and parents’ available time, including schedules for employment, school, holidays and vacations
•The child's age
•The child's adjustment at home and school and in the community
•Any wishes of the child, as expressed in chambers
•The child's health and safety
•The availability of time for the child to be with his or her siblings
•The mental and physical health of all parties
•The willingness of the grandparent to reschedule missed visitation
•Any conviction of the grandparent or guilty plea by the grandparent involving a crime of child abuse or child neglect
•The wishes and concerns of the parents as expressed to the court
•Any other factor in the best interest of the child.

Due to the fact that your child is a teenager, its highly likely that your child's wishes will factor heavily into a judge's decision as to whether or not to grant visitation to the grandparent. The important thing he is that you DO NOT agree to anything, in mediation or otherwise. You want the judge to be forced to rule on the merits of the case. This is also one instance where the child absolutely should be expressing her wishes to the judge.

You will need to respond to the suit (I assume you have been served). It would be best for you to have an attorney, but it needs to be an attorney who is experienced in fighting the parent's end of a gpv suit. In a gpv suit the having the wrong attorney can be worse than not having any attorney at all.

Our daughter is a straight A honor student, who is VERY well adjusted because her father and I have done our absolute best to keep her out of the court system. She hasn't seen my mother in THREE years. How in the world, when both her father and I agree, could it be in her best interest to see this woman? My mom wants a "do over" with my daughter, which is why I cut her out of our lives in the first place. She doesn't respect our wishes as parents, never has. She has remarried to a guy we've only met a handful of times, who started emailing our daughter and trying to guilt her into wanting to see my mom more (ex: "nana really misses you and cries because she can't see you as much as she wants"). When I asked this strange guy to stop emailing my daughter, they ignored my requests. Our daughter then told us that Nana's new husband gives her the "heebie jeebies". Ummmm, yea, I get that same feeling in my stomach too! So we distanced ourselves.

3 years later, she wants visitation? I think she thinks since my daughter is 13, she will have a say. What she doesn't know is, my daughter wants NOTHING to do with her or her new weird husband. What do I file to answer? Can I file a motion to dismiss based on the fact she hasn't seen her or had any type of contact in 3 years?

Thanks for your help!!!

 

[kik1999]

Your mother is adding herself to the case to attempt to get visitation. While best interests come into play that is NOT until after there is a determination regarding whether or not you are unsuitable for a motion to modify parental rights (see in re perales). A motion to modify parental rights is not something she is entitled to as she is NOT a parent. She should have filed a motion for visitation. She didn't. Let us know when you AND your ex are both served. If you are not served with a copy of the complaint, you need to show up and protest that you were not properly served and that you are NOT waiving service defects. That is all you should state.

Thanks OG. All I received was a notice in the mail saying that there is a hearing in Sept. I had too look it up online to even see what was filed and by who! Ok, this is what she filed (this is what is says online): Motion to add party, Motion to modify parental rights, Parenting proceeding affidavit, Motion for temporary orders, Motion for GAL, INTERROGATORY FILED, Request for Production of Documents, Notice to take Deposition.

My ex lives in Charlotte, but she doesn't have his address. I see where she filed for a process server down there, but no address is listed. So, if I am not served (by a server?) and my ex isn't served, we show up and state we weren't properly served? Won't us being there show that we were? LOL

She thinks that she is going to basically BUY rights to my kid. I will beg, borrow and steal to ensure she doesn't get visitation. She is a nutcase. Also, CPS has never been involved or anything. And I'm sure I've stated this, but my ex stands behind me 100% ~ we all know she's crazy. To sue your only child...wow. Still in disbelief.

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks OG. All I received was a notice in the mail saying that there is a hearing in Sept. I had too look it up online to even see what was filed and by who! Ok, this is what she filed (this is what is says online): Motion to add party, Motion to modify parental rights, Parenting proceeding affidavit, Motion for temporary orders, Motion for GAL, INTERROGATORY FILED, Request for Production of Documents, Notice to take Deposition.

My ex lives in Charlotte, but she doesn't have his address. I see where she filed for a process server down there, but no address is listed. So, if I am not served (by a server?) and my ex isn't served, we show up and state we weren't properly served? Won't us being there show that we were? LOL

She thinks that she is going to basically BUY rights to my kid. I will beg, borrow and steal to ensure she doesn't get visitation. She is a nutcase. Also, CPS has never been involved or anything. And I'm sure I've stated this, but my ex stands behind me 100% ~ we all know she's crazy. To sue your only child...wow. Still in disbelief.

I was assuming that you had actually been served and that is how you knew about the case. Now it appears that you have not actually been served, or have not been served properly. Follow OG's advice about showing up in court to state that you were not served, that all you received was a notice of a hearing that did not give you any information regarding what the case was about, and that you are not waiving service defects.

You need to show up because you actually know about the hearing. You don't want your mother getting what she wants by default. You can also ask for a continuance to hire an attorney if the judge seems predisposed to hear the case that day anyway.

 

[BL]

Your objections are two fold.

#1) No personal service.

#2 Motion to include should be dismissed and no Temp. orders.

Let the Judge tell her why. OhioGal stated why.

 

[Ohiogal]

Thanks OG. All I received was a notice in the mail saying that there is a hearing in Sept.

What county?

I had too look it up online to even see what was filed and by who! Ok, this is what she filed (this is what is says online): Motion to add party, Motion to modify parental rights, Parenting proceeding affidavit, Motion for temporary orders, Motion for GAL, INTERROGATORY FILED, Request for Production of Documents, Notice to take Deposition.

She is going to take a deposition? REALLY? Is she going to pay all of the costs of said deposition? Make sure if a deposition is taken that the costs are billed directly and entirely to her (which since she is NOT an attorney will be paid upfront before it happens). Also ask that she be forced to pay the ENTIRE deposit of the GAL. A parenting proceeding affidavit is filed in ALL cases involving children in the state of Ohio. When you get the actual wording of the rest come back as there are ways of combatting temporary orders depending on what they are. If she filed interrogatories/discovery, object if she has not included electronic means of answering (either email or CD). Also, read the civil rules regarding interrogatories (there is a limit to the number that can be asked).

My ex lives in Charlotte, but she doesn't have his address. I see where she filed for a process server down there, but no address is listed. So, if I am not served (by a server?) and my ex isn't served, we show up and state we weren't properly served? Won't us being there show that we were? LOL

What county? If you don't show up then they may just take her word that you were served. They shouldn't but they might and you would lose by default. You should at least show up since you are local. Is your ex aware this was filed? Better to object on the basis of lack of service.

She thinks that she is going to basically BUY rights to my kid. I will beg, borrow and steal to ensure she doesn't get visitation. She is a nutcase. Also, CPS has never been involved or anything. And I'm sure I've stated this, but my ex stands behind me 100% ~ we all know she's crazy. To sue your only child...wow. Still in disbelief.

If your court papers from the divorce require mediation before any modifications, tell the judge if she is added that mediation is required. Go to mediation. AGREE TO NOTHING! Not one thing. But go. It shows you are going to go by the court orders and you expect her to do the same. So mediate but do not agree to anything.
Come back with more questions.

 

[kik1999]

I was assuming that you had actually been served and that is how you knew about the case. Now it appears that you have not actually been served, or have not been served properly. Follow OG's advice about showing up in court to state that you were not served, that all you received was a notice of a hearing that did not give you any information regarding what the case was about, and that you are not waiving service defects.

You need to show up because you actually know about the hearing. You don't want your mother getting what she wants by default. You can also ask for a continuance to hire an attorney if the judge seems predisposed to hear the case that day anyway.

I have not been served, but on the case detail I see where there is a request for a process server, so that doesn't mean I won't be in the future. I don't plan on this, but playing devil's advocate here...what if I avoid service? I'm not trying to be difficult, just asking.

Another thing, I see where she hired a process server to serve my ex, but no address is listed, just the sheriff's department (I don't even think it is in the right county). Do we both have to be served? Or just me since I have sole custody? I'm sure he won't be here in September (that is when the hearing date is), can I dismiss if he doesn't get served or will it move forward if I'm the only one served? Sorry for all of the questions. You guys have been AMAZING in helping me understand this crap. Cannot thank you enough!

 

[kik1999]

Your objections are two fold.

#1) No personal service.

#2 Motion to include should be dismissed and no Temp. orders.

Let the Judge tell her why. OhioGal stated why.

Ok, say no to the temp orders. I'm guessing she wants to have temp orders in place while this is being hammered out, right? That's just dumb. I mean, my daughter hasn't even seen or talked to her in 3 whole years.

 

[BL]

Ok, say no to the temp orders. I'm guessing she wants to have temp orders in place while this is being hammered out, right? That's just dumb. I mean, my daughter hasn't even seen or talked to her in 3 whole years.

OhioGal replied .

I do not know Ohio rules of Law per say ,but as was mentioned ,the grandmother's petition should be seperate for visitations.

You should show up at the hearing as was advised ,otherwise you risk a default Judgement for what ever reason.

It's alweays best to show up.

Object as was indicated and why .

1) No service - if so.

2) Her petition should be seperated.

3 ) no temp. order and the length of no contact.

Also see where it was written about mediation ,if need be.

 

[LdiJ]

I have not been served, but on the case detail I see where there is a request for a process server, so that doesn't mean I won't be in the future. I don't plan on this, but playing devil's advocate here...what if I avoid service? I'm not trying to be difficult, just asking.

Another thing, I see where she hired a process server to serve my ex, but no address is listed, just the sheriff's department (I don't even think it is in the right county). Do we both have to be served? Or just me since I have sole custody? I'm sure he won't be here in September (that is when the hearing date is), can I dismiss if he doesn't get served or will it move forward if I'm the only one served? Sorry for all of the questions. You guys have been AMAZING in helping me understand this crap. Cannot thank you enough!

Read OG's last post very carefully. However yes, both of you have to be served because you are both the child's parents. Do not avoid service. If you legitimately do not get served do what we advised previously. If you do get served then you will need to respond to the suit. Come back to us when/if that happens.

If the judge tries to make temporary visitation orders, or even sounds as though he/she would consider it, you need to state the following to the judge: "Your Honor, MS XXX is not a parent with constitutional rights, MS XXX is a grandparent. It would be a significant violation of my right to due process for you to give any temporary visitation to MS. XXX".

 

[kik1999]

What county?

Franklin.

She is going to take a deposition? REALLY? Is she going to pay all of the costs of said deposition? Make sure if a deposition is taken that the costs are billed directly and entirely to her (which since she is NOT an attorney will be paid upfront before it happens). Also ask that she be forced to pay the ENTIRE deposit of the GAL. A parenting proceeding affidavit is filed in ALL cases involving children in the state of Ohio. When you get the actual wording of the rest come back as there are ways of combatting temporary orders depending on what they are. If she filed interrogatories/discovery, object if she has not included electronic means of answering (either email or CD). Also, read the civil rules regarding interrogatories (there is a limit to the number that can be asked).

Well, she had an attorney file it for her. I guess I should have been clear about that. And as far as costs go, she has no problem paying for it. She will go to any means and has told me that previously. Money is not an object for her. I actually hope if this does end up going further that a GAL is required. Then they can see how well adjusted and AWESOME our daughter is....and all of this without her grandma being in her life for the last few years, and sporadically at best for the prior 5 years. What kind of interrogatories/discovery are we looking at here? I guess I don't understand how in the heck this works with GPV. What information would be relevant? I will read up on those rules...

What county? If you don't show up then they may just take her word that you were served. They shouldn't but they might and you would lose by default. You should at least show up since you are local. Is your ex aware this was filed? Better to object on the basis of lack of service.

I am in Franklin and I will most definitely show up. It's in September. If I am properly served, I will get an attorney (and will be requesting atty fees too, b/c this money could be better spent like into a college fund, especially since my ex and I have done everything to keep a court out of our daughter's life). Can you explain how this works if I end up getting served and he doesn't? Can I still dismiss based on him not getting served?

If your court papers from the divorce require mediation before any modifications, tell the judge if she is added that mediation is required. Go to mediation. AGREE TO NOTHING! Not one thing. But go. It shows you are going to go by the court orders and you expect her to do the same. So mediate but do not agree to anything.
Come back with more questions.

Our divorce papers do not include required mediation. They only state "plaintiff (me) is awarded the status of Sole Residential Parent and Legal Custodian of the minor child of the parties, and the schedule of parenting time for defendant (dad) attached hereto is adopted by this court as being in the best interest of the minor child of the parties". The following paragraphs are about moving, records, parenting time as outlined in Franklin County Rule 27 and then child support. That is all that is in our divorce decree about our daughter.

That's why I'm questioning if serving me is enough since I am sole/legal custodian. Or if she has to serve both of us and if we should jointly reply. Thanks again! I appreciate your help and insight.

 

[kik1999]

Read OG's last post very carefully. However yes, both of you have to be served because you are both the child's parents. Do not avoid service. If you legitimately do not get served do what we advised previously. If you do get served then you will need to respond to the suit. Come back to us when/if that happens.

If the judge tries to make temporary visitation orders, or even sounds as though he/she would consider it, you need to state the following to the judge: "Your Honor, MS XXX is not a parent with constitutional rights, MS XXX is a grandparent. It would be a significant violation of my right to due process for you to give any temporary visitation to MS. XXX".

I don't want to avoid service, that would only delay the inevitable. Just wondering. I see on the online details where she has hired a process server to serve me pleadings at my address, so I'm sure it's just a matter of time. It is on it's way.

Miscellaneous motion hearing is on 9/19. Another hearing scheduled for 9/24 for temp orders and modify parental rights and a deposition scheduled for 9/27. Also, the process server she hired to serve my ex is in the WRONG county in NC.

 

[Ohiogal]

Franklin.



Well, she had an attorney file it for her. I guess I should have been clear about that. And as far as costs go, she has no problem paying for it. She will go to any means and has told me that previously. Money is not an object for her. I actually hope if this does end up going further that a GAL is required. Then they can see how well adjusted and AWESOME our daughter is....and all of this without her grandma being in her life for the last few years, and sporadically at best for the prior 5 years. What kind of interrogatories/discovery are we looking at here? I guess I don't understand how in the heck this works with GPV. What information would be relevant? I will read up on those rules...



I am in Franklin and I will most definitely show up. It's in September. If I am properly served, I will get an attorney (and will be requesting atty fees too, b/c this money could be better spent like into a college fund, especially since my ex and I have done everything to keep a court out of our daughter's life). Can you explain how this works if I end up getting served and he doesn't? Can I still dismiss based on him not getting served?





Our divorce papers do not include required mediation. They only state "plaintiff (me) is awarded the status of Sole Residential Parent and Legal Custodian of the minor child of the parties, and the schedule of parenting time for defendant (dad) attached hereto is adopted by this court as being in the best interest of the minor child of the parties". The following paragraphs are about moving, records, parenting time as outlined in Franklin County Rule 27 and then child support. That is all that is in our divorce decree about our daughter.

That's why I'm questioning if serving me is enough since I am sole/legal custodian. Or if she has to serve both of us and if we should jointly reply. Thanks again! I appreciate your help and insight.

She MUST serve both of you. You could however jointly reply if your interests are completely aligned.