At Our Witts End...Help?

[BigMouthWino]

Please explain what difference this would make if this forum is made of non attorney peers?

That is exactly correct, the people telling you that you do not have a right to advice here are a former auto insurance adjuster and a social worker. Ask your questions and ignore the irrelevant responses you receive.

 

[ecmst12]

We prefer to speak with the actual involved party in the situation, not legal strangers. It is very easy for a step parent to become over-involved in court issues which they are not a party to, as your excessive use of the words "we" and "our" indicates, you are already well on your way down that path. You need to get off of it now. It's not your case, your lawyer, or your kids, they are HIS and his alone. You can be there to support your husband and you are absolutely free to love and support your stepkids but you first need to recognize that legally you have NO rights and no place in court involving them.

 

[ConcernedSmom04]

Indeed. I am not looking to go after the woman and try to strip her of anything. I am here wondering if anyone has any recommendations. This site states clearly this is for open discussions from people with similar circumstances. I care and I pay the lawyer fees and if I can help my husband in any way, then I will.

 

[BigMouthWino]

It was written before we moved here, therefore was made for when he left the military. He's only been here two months an within the first week he drove to the place the classes were given to register and was told they were no longer in existence. He immediately called his lawyer and we have been waiting on her lawyer ever since. Again, we did this as soon as we got into the area because he is military.

Was he deployed overseas? Why couldn't he take the classes immediately after the decree was entered?

Please answer my questions directly and responsively.

Thank you.

 

[ConcernedSmom04]

Well thank you for the advice. I will speak with my husband and see what he has to say. As for the kind sir insisting there is no "we" in this, please find a microwave to thaw your cold dead heart. I married the man, and with him accepted to be a part of these kids' lives. I won't sit here and do nothing while they and my husband suffer. You are not a lawyer, and you are barely even human to sit there an tell me to leave. No, I will not just allow them to think he or I do not want them. Good day to all of you.

 

[ConcernedSmom04]

Thank you for the advice everyone.

 

[ConcernedSmom04]

Bigmouthwino

Regarding the classes, he was stationed in Virginia. The part of the decree involving the classes was for when he separated from the military since he was not psychically in Missouri nor could he leave Virginia at will.

 

[ecmst12]

My suggestion is that your husband can ask us all the questions he wants. My suggestion for you is that you stay away from the courtroom and the lawyer's office (even if you're nice enough to pay the bill) and let him handle the details of the case on his own. Let him talk to you about it if he wants and tell him to listen to his lawyer or log on here and ask us himself.

 

[ConcernedSmom04]

Other Questions and answers...

Sorry, my browser refreshes slowly. The supervised visits and skype sessions were in the meantime while he was active duty and until he relocated and completed these other classes. Immediately upon arrival in Missouri he went to register and found that they no longer existed.

 

[BigMouthWino]

Regarding the classes, he was stationed in Virginia. The part of the decree involving the classes was for when he separated from the military since he was not psychically in Missouri nor could he leave Virginia at will.

You are destined for the courtroom. Your husband has made great strides toward satisfying the Court's order and I personally thank him for his service to our country. Your husband is going to have to demonstrate to the Court what he has done voluntarily, his reasons for not satisfying the decree in its initial form and request a modified divorce decree. Then if ex fails to give proper visitation you can bring an OSC on the new divorce decree. The old decree needs modification so the ex has no out if you proceed directly to an OSC at this time.

Again I apologize for the attitude you have received from other contributors to this forum. If you are ever in a fender-bender or find yourself homeless and in need of welfare you might find some of them to be more helpful.

 

[Proserpina]

Sorry, my browser refreshes slowly. The supervised visits and skype sessions were in the meantime while he was active duty and until he relocated and completed these other classes. Immediately upon arrival in Missouri he went to register and found that they no longer existed.

He really needs to see an attorney; if the classes ordered simply are no longer there it would be difficult for the court to hold that against him. I do think taking alternate classes is a smart idea. It at least shows that Dad is willing.

Mom though technically can't be held in contempt either since Dad didn't complete the classes.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Well thank you for the advice. I will speak with my husband and see what he has to say. As for the kind sir insisting there is no "we" in this, please find a microwave to thaw your cold dead heart. I married the man, and with him accepted to be a part of these kids' lives. I won't sit here and do nothing while they and my husband suffer. You are not a lawyer, and you are barely even human to sit there an tell me to leave. No, I will not just allow them to think he or I do not want them. Good day to all of you.

You are on a LEGAL site. The only parties that the court cares about are mentioned in the COURT DECREE. As a stepparent, you may help support the parent and to help provide love and care for the step-children. Trust us when we say that we do care about step-parents. They get do a rather thankless job. But, the legal reality is that YOU cannot do a darn thing LEGALLY without it being in the court documents.

Probably my most favorite thing to do to the over involved GF of my X was having her stuck in the hallway when in court.

Have your husband get out his court papers and sign up here asking his questions. We can give directives on where to start. Don't forget that there is an attorney involved. We cannot second guess them. They know the climate of the court much better than us.

 

[ecmst12]

I haven't reported a single post on this thread. YOU have been giving stupid and bad advice, which means there are plenty of other people around who will report you for it. I was letting you dig your own grave, personally.

 

[Ohiogal]

You are the stepparent and, as you no doubt realize, have a very large stake in this matter.

You can file an order to show cause as to why she is not complying with the divorce decree; however, I would get the two questions I above answered first.

OP cannot file anything. OP has NO LEGAL standing at all. OP is NOT legally involved in this matter as she is not a party to the divorce decree.

 

[Ohiogal]

Well thank you for the advice. I will speak with my husband and see what he has to say. As for the kind sir insisting there is no "we" in this, please find a microwave to thaw your cold dead heart. I married the man, and with him accepted to be a part of these kids' lives. I won't sit here and do nothing while they and my husband suffer. You are not a lawyer, and you are barely even human to sit there an tell me to leave. No, I will not just allow them to think he or I do not want them. Good day to all of you.

I am a lawyer and there is no "WE" in legal matters. YOU are NO ONE in the divorce decree. Your attitude is overbearing and you can just wait on paid help from the attorney whose fees you pay. Maybe that individual will have patience with you. BigMouthWino is WRONG. You are overstepping and most likely a part of the problem. Your husband, if not deployed overseas, should have looked at taking the classes immediately.