Coach and school violating my rights...

[daddenied]

This is just the mediation report it is not the judges orders, please go back and reread the options from the local rules for the next step in this process, the attorney will help with this as well. The mediator is not the last word there is an appeal process , family study. ec730, GAL etc don't give up.

Hello. It's DD's GF again. I'm in between classes and thought I'd get on again. Apparently, the July 1st order (amended Sept 14th only to change therapist) stated that after the counseling visits, the mediator's recommendation would be the new order of visitation. If we understood correctly, there would be no other court appearance necessary unless Phillip objected, therefore a new court hearing date would be given. According to the attorney, if no objection is filed then her recommendation would stand as the current order. He IS filing a recommendation, but told us that Fresno is so backed up, the hearing may be in 2-3 months. Another delay. He also recommended DD call the counseling facility that his two younger sons are supposedly ordered to undergo counseling to see if his ex actually signed them up or is going to further delay it by not doing anything about it. We called yesterday twice, but got no return call. We are fearful that they will not call DD due to paperwork saying mother has sole custody. He is close to giving up, but I will stick with him and hopefully this attorney can help clean up this entire mess. Thank you.

 

[daddenied]

Dad's other option is to begin the painful process of sewing his heart shut, leaving his kids in the hands of his bitch of an ex, and get on with the rest of his life without all of them. If the older kids don't want to see him he needs to let them know he's not going to be their emotional whipping boy or an "at-will santa". It sounds harsh, but the alternative may be spending every emotional, financial, and marital ounce of blood fighting a system that won't ever let him win.

Maybe he'll get lucky and it will all change, but it won't be because the judge sees Jesus and becomes a more understanding person overnight. He/she obviously has a hard spot for dad. OTH, maybe Jesus and a lightning bolt is the only answer.

We have spoken in length about this option. He told me last night that whatever happens from now to the end of the contempt hearings, custody/visitation hearing, etc...with this attorney, he will leave it at that. If he gets to see the kids, great! If not, there is no more that we can do except love them from a distance, continue to pay CS and go on with our lives...with HIS life. I worry about the outcome, but again we can do no more. The kids, as far as I am concerned are old enough to understand that DD loves them and that their mother has hurt their relationship with him. I believe at this point and time some factors might be, "I can get away with more things with mom, she doesn't make us attend church like dad takes us when mom says we should not have to go since we should be able to make our own decisions, I live in a house with mom and dad lives in a little tiny apartment, dad won't let me date until I'm 16-in group settings, mom is letting us do that now, I can fail my classes and still go out with friends and play sports with mom when dad would take those privileges away, etc..." I hate sounding like a B, but I also think the children have been told lies like "we divorced because daddy loves someone else-in case we never informed you all, mother filed for divorce due to irreconcilable differences and refused family counseling to save the marriage. DD begged judge to order counseling, but mom insisted on leaving." I don't know why I'm telling all of this...I guess I'm just frustrated and now talking about irrelevant things myself. Anyhow, thanks for your advice. I will let DD know about contacting Father Rigths groups or attorney groups and check our new attorney out.

 

[calitogeorgia]

What is the name of your state? CA

My parents were there and after the game, I went down to the field to see my son. I went up to him and said hello and he said hi back.


It seems that most people were missing an important piece to this thread.....he said accordingly he went to talk to his son AFTER the game. So I would imagine that it was over with. The coach has no legal right to interfere with what the parents do with their children and the coaches cannot in any legal way in the state of CA get involved with the parents legal affairs. Unless there is a restraining order set forth then they cannot interfere. I would wonder if something was going on with the coach and the ex, to be honest.
The coach could face being fired from the school if the school and the district that it is in, were to get wind of this taking place within their school or district.

Bad choice on the coaches part.

 

[casa]

Hello. It's DD's GF again. I'm in between classes and thought I'd get on again. Apparently, the July 1st order (amended Sept 14th only to change therapist) stated that after the counseling visits, the mediator's recommendation would be the new order of visitation. If we understood correctly, there would be no other court appearance necessary unless Phillip objected, therefore a new court hearing date would be given. According to the attorney, if no objection is filed then her recommendation would stand as the current order. He IS filing a recommendation, but told us that Fresno is so backed up, the hearing may be in 2-3 months. Another delay. He also recommended DD call the counseling facility that his two younger sons are supposedly ordered to undergo counseling to see if his ex actually signed them up or is going to further delay it by not doing anything about it. We called yesterday twice, but got no return call. We are fearful that they will not call DD due to paperwork saying mother has sole custody. He is close to giving up, but I will stick with him and hopefully this attorney can help clean up this entire mess. Thank you.

Dad has a right to medical/school records. I believe he already has that form from www.deltabravo.net The problem is, that even if kids aren't doing so well...Mom is trying to say that's because of Dad's 'disruption'.

Attorney will present or advise how to present issues that the mediator did not take into consideration &/or erred on. ie; Dad did not know counselor prior to order & the insurance referral. (Time he/they began counseling should show timeline, etc.) Any collateral contacts or court documents not addressed. The transcript. Requesting a 730 evaluation will allow a nuetral party to further investigate, etc.

And attorney will address the issues of contempt and Mom's repeated failure to abide by existing & temporary court orders.

Hang in there

 

[weenor]

I just wanted to add God's speed to you both...As a legal professional I am confounded with much of the "system" involving children, divorce and parenting.. I am often frustrated because I do not think that we as a society have developed the judiciary to deal with this crap...It is unimaginable that two people would go before a stranger for a short amount of time and ask that person to decide issues so vital to their lives...on the other hand sometimes there is no choice...I feel your pain...financially and emotionally..Good luck..

 

[45Frank]

My two cents worth.
Don't give up you can get your visitations don't give up these are your kids and they only grow up once. My X did a lot of the same, her cousin worked in the courts and paperwork disappeared all the time, till this day I don't receive anything from the courts I have to call and get orders faxed. She also did the school thing but I had gotten the FRO against her and it did specifically say where she was to see the kids, the Superintendent at the Attorney's advice wanted all the places listed she couldn't see them not the place she could see them. This is a FM, presumed right and the Male dad is always wrong. I live it.
The only way to stop all the BS is you must get a Good High profile lawyer who will go into the court room and take charge yes who knows more then the Judge. Sell a car no vacations, borrow some money. I couldn't believe how the Judge folded like a dead jellyfish.
It did cost nearly a Thousand dollars per hour but was worth it in the end, we were in and out and done within weeks instead of months as other attorneys told me. He also was an X prosecutor so he knew what Judge to go in front of.
Good Luck and don't give up.
I now do have custody of my two children, the Lawyer will make the Judge see her for what she is and does. My sons grades are up, his sports are better and he is relaxed.

 

[daddenied]

Dad has a right to medical/school records. I believe he already has that form from www.deltabravo.net The problem is, that even if kids aren't doing so well...Mom is trying to say that's because of Dad's 'disruption'.


Hang in there

HEllo, its DD GF again. The children's dentist office sent DD a financial statement, but refused to send any other information about treatment the boys had. After sending that letter we got from the site you directed us to, I think it was you, the dentist sent a pretty nasty email saying he sent what he was supposed to and DD could sue him if he wanted to. We were both shocked and DD backed off worried, against my advice. I was ticked and insisted he request information that was rightfully his. The boys ortho office sent the same info and refused to correspond per DD's ex, the oldest son's psychotherapist or counselor (the woman who supposedly treated him for over a year without DD's consent and knowledge) refused any info saying by law she could not divulge any info to DD. ????

 

[rmet4nzkx]

HEllo, its DD GF again. The children's dentist office sent DD a financial statement, but refused to send any other information about treatment the boys had. After sending that letter we got from the site you directed us to, I think it was you, the dentist sent a pretty nasty email saying he sent what he was supposed to and DD could sue him if he wanted to. We were both shocked and DD backed off worried, against my advice. I was ticked and insisted he request information that was rightfully his. The boys ortho office sent the same info and refused to correspond per DD's ex, the oldest son's psychotherapist or counselor (the woman who supposedly treated him for over a year without DD's consent and knowledge) refused any info saying by law she could not divulge any info to DD. ????

DD's new attorney can subpoena the records. The mediator's reccommendation is not a court order.

Also since the court failed for produce the requested transcripts, you shoul dbe able to file all the contempt filings late under CA CCP473

 

[calitogeorgia]

county??

are you in San Mateo county by any chance?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

are you in San Mateo county by any chance?

This case is in Fresno county.

 

[daddenied]

DD's new attorney can subpoena the records. The mediator's reccommendation is not a court order.

Also since the court failed for produce the requested transcripts, you shoul dbe able to file all the contempt filings late under CA CCP473

It's DD's GF again. I'm at work and noticed this post. We already filed the contempt paperwork and are waiting for them to send it back to us. We are worried they will send it back with yet another reason for not filing it. We went in person and the person who helped us said everything looked in order. but that's what the last 2 people said only for us to receive it back in the mail saying something was wrong.

 

[dallas702]

It's DD's GF again. I'm at work and noticed this post. We already filed the contempt paperwork and are waiting for them to send it back to us. We are worried they will send it back with yet another reason for not filing it. We went in person and the person who helped us said everything looked in order. but that's what the last 2 people said only for us to receive it back in the mail saying something was wrong.

One of the reasons for having an attorney involved or representing you is to make sure the paperwork is done to the letter. Even though some states have included procedures to make it easier for pro per parents to do their filings, may judges want to see every t crossed and i dotted so appeals and mistakes don't make matters worse. It's expensive if the attorney has to make every move, but often there are specialists who can help with preparing the papers to comply with the court's requirements. Is DD's attorney taking the case entirely and doing the filings, or is he advising DD on which pleas to make?

 

[daddenied]

Is DD's attorney taking the case entirely and doing the filings, or is he advising DD on which pleas to make?

Hi Dallas. It's DD GF-No, he took the case. The only reason we filed the contempt paperwork is that it had already been filed and he told us to refile it the day DD retained him (Monday) and he was putting in the substitution for attorney this coming Monday and filing the objection to the mediator's recommendation. He will be doing everything from now on I understand.

 

[daddenied]

I got a contempt court date

Hey everyone. It's DD. I finally got a contempt court date. I guess praying does work huh? It is in 6 1/2 weeks and the sub of atty has been filed. We are anxious and excited. Will fill you in when I know more. Thank you all very much!

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Hey everyone. It's DD. I finally got a contempt court date. I guess praying does work huh? It is in 6 1/2 weeks and the sub of atty has been filed. We are anxious and excited. Will fill you in when I know more. Thank you all very much!

Hopefully the court will find the transcrits by then? Make sure your atty subpoenas the medical and therapy records.