Does a Custody Evaluation expire?

[Ohiogal]

In this instance your child was not in school when you divorced...and if I understand you correctly that the child is 3, the child won't be going to school for another couple of years. Your reasoning would be valid if the child was already in school and you wanted the child to not have to change schools, but it isn't valid for a child who is not in school yet.

People keep the marital home because they want the home. Not for some advantage regarding custody or convenience. Also, its just as likely that your ex could move back into the same elementary school zone as you by that time, which would make your argument moot.

Actually there is a stability issue with mother for moving several times. And if mother moves again, that further proves it. Father is at least stable in one place for schooling.

 

[_HappyDad_]

What are the thoughts on EX using a "child development and psychotherapist"? I don't know if she took our D3 to the therapist, or if she just consulted one. I don't have any idea who this person is; I've sent her a message asking for the contact info, but she has ignored me. I'm going to message her again, and possibly sent a request via certified mail. Our Orders clearly state we are not to block access to our daughters records.

 

[stealth2]

Honestly? At 3, it's play therapy, at most. I, personally, wouldn't sweat it much.

 

[_HappyDad_]

Based on some experiences of friends, I'm concerned that early exposure to a therapist will lead to EX coaching D3 with terrible consequences later down the road. I'm also concerned that the EX is using the same people who did the Custody Evaluation. They were not on the level.

I apologize if my questions are not best suited for this site. I am a member of the place down the road, but there are technical difficulties over there right now. I really appreciate everyone's input here, and your volunteering is a great service.

 

[_HappyDad_]

I'm back again with another question. State is KY.

EX and I have 50/50 joint legal and physical of D4. I have remained in the marital home, while EX has moved for the fourth time. D4 has lived her entire (short I know) life in my home. The EX has moved to a different school district, but her home is only 3 miles away from mine. We will have to pick a school for D4 soon, and if EX wanted to use my school district, then she would have moved to my district.

How do I frame my argument for making me the residential parent for school purposes? I've been told the 14th Amendment (Brown vs Board) ensures that the Courts view all public schools as equal; school rankings should not be assessed by the Courts. Based on the KY State School Report Card, our opposing elementary schools are virtually identical. Anecdotally, the locals would say her district is "better". Her district only has one elementary school feeding into the high school. My district has several elementary schools feeding into a large middle school and high school.

Also, D4 has friends that live in my neighborhood, and they will be going to the school in my district. One child has a parent who is a principal in our school district.

I live within two miles of the school, and I work literally next door to the school. I can look out of the window and see the kids at recess. The EX lives the same distance from her school. She works ten miles away from the school.

My attorney has advised that our Courts do not go my which school is "best", but instead, use the "best interest" standards. All of the items I have listed work in my favor, according to my attorney.

We each had to do four sessions with a therapist as ordered by the Court at our Trial last summer. My therapist noted that I am a proud father, I learn from my mistakes, and that I always look for solution focused strategies rather than enflaming a situation. The EX's therapist made a diagnosis of anxiety, depression and anger. Should I mention mental health concerns and how it prevents the EX from being able to work together with me?

What do I need to do?

 

[LdiJ]

I'm back again with another question. State is KY.

EX and I have 50/50 joint legal and physical of D4. I have remained in the marital home, while EX has moved for the fourth time. D4 has lived her entire (short I know) life in my home. The EX has moved to a different school district, but her home is only 3 miles away from mine. We will have to pick a school for D4 soon, and if EX wanted to use my school district, then she would have moved to my district.

How do I frame my argument for making me the residential parent for school purposes? I've been told the 14th Amendment (Brown vs Board) ensures that the Courts view all public schools as equal; school rankings should not be assessed by the Courts. Based on the KY State School Report Card, our opposing elementary schools are virtually identical. Anecdotally, the locals would say her district is "better". Her district only has one elementary school feeding into the high school. My district has several elementary schools feeding into a large middle school and high school.

Also, D4 has friends that live in my neighborhood, and they will be going to the school in my district. One child has a parent who is a principal in our school district.

I live within two miles of the school, and I work literally next door to the school. I can look out of the window and see the kids at recess. The EX lives the same distance from her school. She works ten miles away from the school.

My attorney has advised that our Courts do not go my which school is "best", but instead, use the "best interest" standards. All of the items I have listed work in my favor, according to my attorney.

We each had to do four sessions with a therapist as ordered by the Court at our Trial last summer. My therapist noted that I am a proud father, I learn from my mistakes, and that I always look for solution focused strategies rather than enflaming a situation. The EX's therapist made a diagnosis of anxiety, depression and anger. Should I mention mental health concerns and how it prevents the EX from being able to work together with me?

What do I need to do?

You have a 50/50 timeshare and live close to each other. Why is it so important to you that the child go to school in your district?

 

[_HappyDad_]

My reasons are listed in my previous post.

I’ve battled in Court against an EX who wanted me to have less than EOW. My EX made up lie after lie. I’m not about to give in now. My EX has mental problems, beyond the listed diagnoses. It’s imperative that I continue to provide the stability D4 needs.

 

[LdiJ]

My reasons are listed in my previous post.

I’ve battled in Court against an EX who wanted me to have less than EOW. My EX made up lie after lie. I’m not about to give in now. My EX has mental problems, beyond the listed diagnoses. It’s imperative that I continue to provide the stability D4 needs.

Dad, I understand but once again, if the schools are equally good and are not far apart then you might be over reacting. Also, you might simply inform your ex that you are going to enroll the child, do so, and see where it goes from there. The bottom line is that school enrollment does not need to be a hill to die on if it does not present any significant hardship to either parent and the schools are decent.

 

[_HappyDad_]

This is a hill to die on for me. I remained in the home so that D4 could go to school in my district. The EX created this situation by moving several times. Also, the EX dated someone for a long time. The person had kids that D4 spent a lot of time with. He ended up dumping her. During all of this, the EX tried to tell me that D4 needed to have consistency in her life, and that we need family therapy.

If it's not a big deal, then EX should just agree on my district. After all, my home has been the most consistent thing in kiddo's life for the last four years.

 

[stealth2]

and that I always look for solution focused strategies rather than enflaming a situation.

Doesn't seem so from your new set of posts.

how it prevents the EX from being able to work together with me?

Seems like you're both unable to do so.

I'd say you have a 50-50 shot at prevailing.

 

[_HappyDad_]

This is one situation out of many over the last three years. I’ve been trying to get this sorted out since the beginning. This is one thing I will not give in on.

I understand that I’ve only presented this one situation, and the responses make sense based on such. However, the totality of events is ridiculous. I simply cannot list them all.

if anyone has any legal advice on how to prepare an argument for a hearing that determines school selection, i would love to learn.

 

[LdiJ]

This is one situation out of many over the last three years. I’ve been trying to get this sorted out since the beginning. This is one thing I will not give in on.

I understand that I’ve only presented this one situation, and the responses make sense based on such. However, the totality of events is ridiculous. I simply cannot list them all.

if anyone has any legal advice on how to prepare an argument for a hearing that determines school selection, i would love to learn.

Dad, if you base every decision going forward, on the totality of events, you, your ex and your daughter are going to dealing with unnecessary strife (and maybe some misery for your child) for the rest of her childhood.

Every decision made should be based on that situation only. You have a 50/50 timeshare and 50/50 decision making. That takes cooperation, consideration and compromise to work in the long term. You are not exhibiting that yourself.

 

[_HappyDad_]

It is impossible to assess my level of cooperation based on a singular situation.

Do you think my EX should just agree to my school district?

 

[stealth2]

It is impossible to assess my level of cooperation based on a singular situation.

Do you think my EX should just agree to my school district?

Maybe she thinks you should just agree to hers...

 

[_HappyDad_]

My EX testified at Trial that I am a "bad father" because I show up to kiddo's activities, even when it's not my parenting day. Does that sound like a reasonable person?

My EX testified that I should have every other Saturday and Sunday supervised parenting time, with no weekday time, because she thinks it is kiddo's best interest. She could not provide any evidence why; only that she thinks I'm bi-polar. Such mental health allegations were proven unfounded, as I took it upon myself to get assessed by two professionals.

I like to use facts and evidence. I do not sling mud. So, my question stands. How do I prepare a case for Court to choose a school district? I am not changing my mind on what I want.