Father allowing girlfriend to bath with daughter

[tigger22472]

yep, I ask both kids before I go in if they need to use it, both always say no, within 5 mins they are knocking at the door
what are gonna do about it though

OH we have two bathrooms so it's not like they are using it unless the other is occupied and they just HAVE to go. But it's like the phone issue... no one has anything to say until I get on the phone (i.e get into the bath). The older makes comments and jokes but it hasn't stopped him from walking in.

In some ways I do think it's good however. I try to look at it that they are boys and maybe they won't be as curious as to what a woman looks like under her clothes...LOL I know, I live in a fantasy world... but I like it...

 

[SingleMom67]

...and as a single Mom sometimes that means we are all rushing to get out the door and running around from drawers to dryer in various states of undress....

That one made me laugh out loud. I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one!!!!!

 

[Zephyr]

That one made me laugh out loud. I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one!!!!!

that was exactly my thought! although in my house add the mom turn drill sergeant "LETS GO LETS GO LETS GO"

 

[snostar]

I checked my calendar....I am free: ANYTIME!

Tempting...I have some criteria...how old are you? how tall are you? how much hair do you have?

 

[LdiJ]

I have a question to ask.....

Would any of us here, regulars, based on our knowledge of family law and how the courts work....actually bath in the nude with a stepchild?....or the child of a boyfriend/girlfriend?....same sex or not?

I certainly wouldn't. I also can't imagine anyone I know doing that unless the child was a toddler....and even then I am not sure that I can imagine it. I think that all of us would be more aware of the potential risks to do something like that.

So, if its something that WE wouldn't do.....is it fair to act as though the OP's concerns are invalid? Just food for thought.

 

[CJane]

So, if its something that WE wouldn't do.....is it fair to act as though the OP's concerns are invalid? Just food for thought.

I don't think that we were acting as if the concern itself isn't valid. However, as we all also know... there's a difference between a valid concern and a valid LEGAL concern.

Based on a similar experience that my sister had with her ex and his new wife, this is one of those things that can easily be chalked up to 'cultural differences' - especially given the age of the child, and LEGALLY nothing would be done.

 

[tigger22472]

I don't think that we were acting as if the concern itself isn't valid. However, as we all also know... there's a difference between a valid concern and a valid LEGAL concern.

Based on a similar experience that my sister had with her ex and his new wife, this is one of those things that can easily be chalked up to 'cultural differences' - especially given the age of the child, and LEGALLY nothing would be done.

I agree. I personally don't remember actually taking a lot of baths with my kids even when they were toddlers (I did a few times and maybe if I did more so I wouldn't have ruined my back leaning over the tub so much... ) And no.. I've never considered it with my step-daughter, however, when she was younger I did help her bathe (once again severely leaned over the tub) but it wasn't so much because I thought it wasn't right, just wasn't something I did.

As pointed out in this thread, everyone looks at nudity differently and the OP hasn't indicated that anything inappropriate has gone on.

 

[casa]

I have a question to ask.....

Would any of us here, regulars, based on our knowledge of family law and how the courts work....actually bath in the nude with a stepchild?....or the child of a boyfriend/girlfriend?....same sex or not?

I certainly wouldn't. I also can't imagine anyone I know doing that unless the child was a toddler....and even then I am not sure that I can imagine it. I think that all of us would be more aware of the potential risks to do something like that.

So, if its something that WE wouldn't do.....is it fair to act as though the OP's concerns are invalid? Just food for thought.

Well, LdiJ you see several of us posted that situations like these do/have happened with our kids &/or step-kids, so there's an answer.

 

[LdiJ]

Well, LdiJ you see several of us posted that situations like these do/have happened with our kids &/or step-kids, so there's an answer.

I have to admit that I didn't read every post....but I wasn't talking about what we did with our OWN kids....I was talking about what we did with other people's kids. I personally can't imagine bathing in the nude with someone else's child....even if that child was a stepchild or the child of a boyfriend/girlfriend...or even my nieces. I would be too cognizant of the possible ramifications of that on a legal basis.....and simply too "modest" otherwise.

I have bathed other people's little ones (and my nieces) with my shirt off (bra on) because quite frankly....the adults get wet too.... However I honestly can't imagine any scenario where I could feel it appropriate, to bathe in the nude with another person's child. That isn't just "cultural"...its "self preservation"!

 

[casa]

I have to admit that I didn't read every post....but I wasn't talking about what we did with our OWN kids....I was talking about what we did with other people's kids. I personally can't imagine bathing in the nude with someone else's child....even if that child was a stepchild or the child of a boyfriend/girlfriend...or even my nieces. I would be too cognizant of the possible ramifications of that on a legal basis.....and simply too "modest" otherwise.

I have bathed other people's little ones (and my nieces) with my shirt off (bra on) because quite frankly....the adults get wet too.... However I honestly can't imagine any scenario where I could feel it appropriate, to bathe in the nude with another person's child. That isn't just "cultural"...its "self preservation"!

I posted about my 5 yr old telling me how funny her soon to be step sounded while singing in the shower with her~ Didn't bother me, there is no question of inproper behavior.

I have changed and showered <nude> in the locker rooms/beach changing rooms & Spa with my neices (not my nephews, mind you! )...likewise my sister has showered with my daughter & my neice...and our daughters have bathed together & even been subject to pix of them covered in bubbles. I even have a pic (not x-rated, of course of the grandgirls and grandma in the spa tub)...again all under avg. modesty age.

 

[brisgirl825]

LdiJ, I agree that it is an unwise move for the g/f for the simple fact that it can be made out to be more than innocent. I can't imagine bathing, naked, with someone else's child for those very reasons. The g/f is taking a risk here and hopefully, it won't come back to haunt her.

However, as someone with a bad back, I have often bathed with my kids, both boys and girls. I don't do it with the oldest two anymore as they are old enough to wash themselves well enough. When I was teaching them proper washing techniques, I never touched their privates as that it something very important around here. Mom and dad always ask permission before touching the kids' privates which only happens if someone has a rash etc. Kayla gets a shot in the bottom every morning and we don't ask about that though, otherwise she'd never take it!

 

[LdiJ]

I posted about my 5 yr old telling me how funny her soon to be step sounded while singing in the shower with her~ Didn't bother me, there is no question of inproper behavior.

I have changed and showered <nude> in the locker rooms/beach changing rooms & Spa with my neices (not my nephews, mind you! )...likewise my sister has showered with my daughter & my neice...and our daughters have bathed together & even been subject to pix of them covered in bubbles. I even have a pic (not x-rated, of course of the grandgirls and grandma in the spa tub)...again all under avg. modesty age.

The most cherished memory of my entire life....and honestly a special one to my entire family, is my memory of being about 3 years old and my grandpa coming into the bathroom and asking in a big booming voice..."who is in my bathtub?" Its cherished because less than 24 hours later he had a massive stroke and never had any real relationship with the other 7 grandchildren. I am the only one that remembers him before the stroke.

However that one isn't reality...not today's reality.

The bottom line is that you are talking about family....heck...I have have pictures of me and a family friend, when we were both 2 (male/female) taking a bath together.

However I am 48 years old and life is VERY different now.

 

[panzertanker]

Tempting...I have some criteria...how old are you? how tall are you? how much hair do you have?

35, 6ft, do you like Nicholas Cage??? I could be his twin....

 

[Zephyr]

35, 6ft, do you like Nicholas Cage??? I could be his twin....

I love my little nicky baby!

 

[brisgirl825]

I love my little nicky baby!

Me too! Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean too....*swoon*