Father allowing girlfriend to bath with daughter

[lizbeth17]

insisted???

They insisted on it**************..?????? I'm sorry but if your daughter is uncomfortable bathing with a girlfriend of her father's she should not HAVE to do it...Sounds very strange to me...

 

[mommyto4]

If you are uncomfortable with it I would voice your concerns to the father..

HOWEVER.... I have to agree with the others here my oldest is just turning 10 and he could care less and runs around naked after a shower. MODEST hes not. Its really how you view the human body.

 

[snostar]

She told her father and the gf that she could shower on her own and she didnt need her to go in there with her but the gf insisted and the dad told her to.

Then YOU need to get a hold of dad and expand that your daughter is simply not comfortable with this, and you would appreciate it if he did not put her in this same position again.

 

[snostar]

I'd hate to tell you what I would do to someone who INSISTED on getting in the shower with my child...all hell would break loose!

 

[casa]

Yeah, I am one of those weirdo parents that love hotsprings and there are always people soaking in the nude. It is the norm for that sort of thing. I would definitely let me kids go with me to the hot springs and explain to them that different people have different values and that is okay. The nude body is not something to be ashamed of IMHO.

Which was the point I was trying to make...different people view nudity differently.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Since OP didn't feel like responding to a few questions yet in the past when she got the responses she liked, she did I thought I would post the link to that thread from Nov, https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=292370 where she makes a telling statement that she believes dad's reactions are because "SHE" has moved on.... Well, apparently, dad has also moved on and mom is looking for reasons to complain about something else that is entirely a subjective preference. There is nothing illegal with daughter bathing with a same sex adult, or dressing at the local pool in the common dressing room, or showers, which should be a big hint as to the legal answer. Perhaps one of the male members (you know what I mean ) will chilm in with their experiences. Watch out

 

[casa]

I have no problem with allowing his gf and family to bathe her. She takes showers by herself all the time. I allow my daughter her privacy when she's showering and using the bathroom. I dont just leave her in there by herself though. Yes she's seen me without my shirt and what not but being completely nude with a child in the shower is different. . i'm also concern with this becoming more of an issue later on. She told her father and the gf that she could shower on her own and she didnt need her to go in there with her but the gf insisted and the dad told her to.

Then this is about the child feeling uncomfortable...in which case that's easier to bring up to Dad. Let him daughter was uncomfortable/embarrased (& wouldn't hurt to preface it with; "I know it wasn't bad intentions on your g/f's part, but our daughter feels...."

I hope you can work it out.

 

[malcava]

I would not be comfortable with it at all...Modest or not, I want to make sure not to desensitize my daughter to certain things...My naked body fine, I am her mother....A girlfriend of her dad's is different. (much like if i had a son..i would certainly not let a boyfriend bathe with him...)

I've mentioned that as well. If i had a son i wouldnt allow him to bathe with my fiancé at ALL.

 

[casa]

I'd hate to tell you what I would do to someone who INSISTED on getting in the shower with my child...all hell would break loose!

We agree 100% on this one! If my daughter were 'forced'...heads would roll.

 

[snostar]

This is certainly not something to run to court about, and you can't deny visitation. Just work it out.

 

[malcava]

Thank you everyone..

 

[casa]

Since OP didn't feel like responding to a few questions yet in the past when she got the responses she liked, she did I thought I would post the link to that thread from Nov, https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=292370 where she makes a telling statement that she believes dad's reactions are because "SHE" has moved on.... Well, apparently, dad has also moved on and mom is looking for reasons to complain about something else that is entirely a subjective preference. There is nothing illegal with daughter bathing with a same sex adult, or dressing at the local pool in the common dressing room, or showers, which should be a big hint as to the legal answer. Perhaps one of the male members (you know what I mean ) will chilm in with their experiences. Watch out

I also addressed that issue on page 1.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

I also addressed that issue on page 1.

Although she makes reference to her fiance, she doesn't answer your question, does she.

 

[panzertanker]

WOW...my boys saw me in just jeans and a bra once.....they turned red! Sex of the child and parent may also contribute. Modest, I am....a prude, I am not.

Since you are not a prude...

Can I see you in bluejeans and a bra???

 

[panzertanker]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Tx


I just found out from my daughter that her father has allowed his girlfriend to shower and bath with her @ least 4 times. My dauther is six years old. She didnt want to father to get mad at her so she did what he said. What can I do? She hasnt said she doesnt want to go back but i'm worried that if i dont allow her to go with him I can be held in contempt. I have no problem with allowing the girlfriend to bath my daughter and whatnot but when she's naked in the shower with her that draws the line. I have no luck in reaching her father. I just need to know what i can do on my side.


Thanks for reading.

A. OP, you have no dog in this battle that allows you to withhold visitation. DO NOT DO IT. you will be in trouble.
B. Daughter is old enough to voice her own opinion. Tell her it is OK to shower or not with someone else. It is her CHOICE, and she can make it without interferrence from you.
C. Let it roll.... As long as there is no inappropriate nature of the shower (i.e.: showering together just to get done faster.) take a deep breath and let it roll off your back. There is nothing you can do, and you are going to create animosity between all of you, daughter included, if you push the issue.
D. If daughter voices opinion that she is being forced to take shower with another, and she has said she does not want too.... then heads should roll (LEGALLY).