Frustrated with new support order

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

EXCUSE ME .... that you've only had 1 increase in 10 years. Come on ... the cost of raising a child has gone up in 10 years. You've gotten lucky here.

 

[pelletierjason]

EXCUSE ME .... that you've only had 1 increase in 10 years. Come on ... the cost of raising a child has gone up in 10 years. You've gotten lucky here.

That's because I PAY FOR EVERYTHING.

 

[Just Blue]

Well, I hope she doesn't ask to tell you the truth and so far so good. She didn't ask why I couldn't take her to the fair this weekend (which I do every year).

You know...Instead of whining about how unfair this order is...you should be counting your lucky start that Mom has never gone after an increase. By all rights this should be your THIRD modification!! You have saved TONS of money! Stop complaining!

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Guess then that mamma is gonna find that her increase isn't as much as she thought!

 

[pelletierjason]

You know, in reflection of my last post, I am probably going to be paying a lot of the same money I made in the past, only instead of going directly to my daughter it is going to improve the lives of her mom, mom's boyfriend and sisters. Is it fair? I guess you could look at it that way but sorry if I don't.

 

[haiku]

You know, in reflection of my last post, I am probably going to be paying a lot of the same money I made in the past, only instead of going directly to my daughter it is going to improve the lives of her mom, mom's boyfriend and sisters. Is it fair? I guess you could look at it that way but sorry if I don't.

you need to get over that. Honestly. or you will be a miserable person and it will effect you in your every day life as a father and a husband.

 

[pelletierjason]

Guess then that mamma is gonna find that her increase isn't as much as she thought!

And this is somewhat satifying until I think about it from my daughter's PoV.

 

[pelletierjason]

you need to get over that. Honestly. or you will be a miserable person and it will effect you in your every day life as a father and a husband.

You're right and I'm already feeling like I might need some counseling.

 

[Silverplum]

Here they are, jason, the Famous Rollie-Eyes, comin' for ya...



ps - that was not in relation to your "I may need counseling remark." That one I agree with.

 

[GrowUp!]

You're right and I'm already feeling like I might need some counseling.

And there's nothing wrong with that.
The reality is either you and/or your wife are going to have to get supplemental income (unless your state is one of those that would include THAT too). Is your wife already working fulltime?

 

[pelletierjason]

And there's nothing wrong with that.
The reality is either you and/or your wife are going to have to get supplemental income (unless your state is one of those that would include THAT too). Is your wife already working fulltime?

Yes, she is working full time. I think people are getting pretty sick of this thread but to clarify my point...
There are lots of things my wife and I can and probably will have to do so that we can maintain our house and vehicles and still manage to eat well and make sure our child is taken care of. This is totally contrary to the definition of "What is child support?" given on this very site...

"...It is in the best interest of a child for both parents to be obligated to pay for the support of their child. An order for child support transfers the income/wealth from one parent to the other so that the combined incomes/wealth of both parents is available to use for the support of the child."

You will more than likely never convince me that it is in the best interest of either of my children to put my wife under more stress than she already has from working her job and taking care of my youngest to take on yet another job. On top of that to ask her to spend less time with her daughter to help me pay for my other daughter is just never going to happen. She feels like she doesn't get enough time with her as it is. I can take a job, sure...then I can spend less time with both my daughters.
It's not about paying, I want to pay, it's the amount that I can't deal with. The fact that she is much better off than me financially had NOTHING TO DO WITH THE DETERMINATION.

I really don't even want to continue, I'm sorry. I'm really getting angry about my whole situation and my ex and the laws and I'm really ready to freakout.

Thanks again, my frustration is not regarding any of your advice or comments.

 

[nextwife]

My mom and I (used to) buy all her clothes, school stuff, furniture, sporting equipment, CD's, etc.

Stop doing that.

Or do some of it, by buying used stuff instead. I buy stuff at yard sales, ebay, furniture at consignment stores, estate sales and on Craigs list. Part of the trick of ones quality of life isn't what one makes, it's how one spends what they do make.

 

[MrsK]

Speaking of, what do I tell my oldest when she wonders why I can't do and buy the things I used to for her?

Simply that you now must pay more money to help support her and you can not afford to take her to do the things she used to do. You dont really owe your child an explanation anyway

 

[MrsK]

You know, in reflection of my last post, I am probably going to be paying a lot of the same money I made in the past, only instead of going directly to my daughter it is going to improve the lives of her mom, mom's boyfriend and sisters. Is it fair? I guess you could look at it that way but sorry if I don't.

Its not fair, but its also not YOUR fault. Now your ex will have to provide all those things for your daughter. You dont have to pay for a THING outside of the court order. So dont.

 

[tuffbrk]

Will Admin please close this post?! Poor, poor baby - and what a super guy on top of it...bought everything for his child, leaving mom no choice but to accept whatever was offered. And really - since so little was given to financially providing a roof and food to support his daughter, thank goodness he bought everything else.

Now that the funds are being given to mom to use in the manner she believes is appropriate to accomodate their daughter's needs (and mom is the CP right?!) dad is sulking because he won't be able to afford TREATS?!!

Please, admin, close this "poor me" post.