jslopez711 said:
I got to tell you, my crazy ex (she wasn't even my wife) does some crazy a** stuff. After the split things were not good. In fact, they were very bad. It landed her boyfriend (at the time) in jail, it was that bad. As time went on things never really got better, but she began to understand that my Son needed BOTH of us. So things aren't better between her and I but the fact that she now recognizes that she is not Super Mom and that the boy actually needs his father, makes things a bit easier. And everything you have said, the precise time in life you are in right now, is where her and I when my boy was at excatly your boys age. I swear but you sound EXACTLY that crazy Italian woman a few years back.
Ahhh, I got it, you are just like my deadbeat ex then, who lies and steals, cheats and harrassess. Is that what you are saying? I used to think my son needed his father, it's why I worked hard for years to get along with him and encourage him. For YEARS. With little or no results. Years of opportunity, years of frustration, years of denial on his part. No, I don't want the boy, no I don't want to see the boy, sorry, I'm busy that weekend with my girlfriend, sorry, I can't do anything for Christmas, don't have the money to buy any presents but I bought my girlfriend another diamond necklace.
Bitter? YOU BET. Bitter because this man denied his son over and over and then suddenly..ooh, won't it look good if I have this kid at my wedding?
A PhD, graduated almost two years ago, still bartending - and only two days a week! - the rest of the time he's either in the gym or sitting on his butt watching cable. He's too lazy to get up and get a real job. All these days, all this time he could have, at any time, spent a whole bunch of time with the little boy. But he didn't, he wouldn't, not until he was "ready". I'm suppose to be okay with that? Well, I've tried to be okay with that but it isn't right for my little boy. It isn't right to have sporadic, inconsistent -months go by before I see him again - interaction. In the meantime, during all this, I'm going to school, working and raising my children alone. My daughter is an honor student, my son is in the band and my littlest boy is happy, healthy and sheltered from this war. The war that the ex started for selfish reasons, for appearances and for whatever nutty reasons bounce around in his empty head.
Supermom? I never said I was that, but I am a GOOD mother. I always put my kids first and will always do so. I am a good person and a steady person for my children. My ex is not good for the boy. He needs counseling for his pathological lying and he needs some kind of parenting course. (The court has already ordered this). If he doesn't comply and move forward, the doc is going to let the court know and it's only going to stay this limited contact or worse.
Your situation may have been hard on you, but you have no idea how hard this can be on a totally innocent party. Consider other sides before you start throwing stones. If the judge had thought I was lying or nutso, he would have issued the sop.
Re: the jail issue..perjury. Blatent, out and out perjury. Can be proven in a heartbeat when we go back for the final hearing. Damaging lying testimony which, if the judge believed, would have hurt my faimly horribly. But the facts prove he lied.
BTW, I don't want my ex in jail, I just want him to tell the truth. I have lived with his lies for years and years and I'm tired of it. What if he feeds these lies to our son? I will protect my son from these types of things. You can say , oh well, if he does do that, if he psychologically damages the boy, take him back to court. I'd rather get all this done in one shot and protect my son NOW.
And another BTW, he decided he wasn't going to pay child support during this court situation. Texas won't whip you until you are 500 in arrears, so what he did is sent 125 at the first (his cs is 500). At this rate, it will be a couple months before he hits the 500 arrears. He is playing more of his games, trying to disrupt my family's budget and it's working. My daughter, who is a hard working honor student- who I've saved for over a year to send to a career camp in Orlando- won't get to go now because my ex forced us into court. He's taking money away from my children, all of them, and sticking it in the lawyers pocket. This never had to happen. How would you feel if you gave your ex total access, they didn't exercise that and then when you and your child were doing well, happy and content...BAM..he..or she in your case..pulled out a bunch of lies and tried to cause your lives to crumble. Could you just sit there and take it? Agree to whatever your ex was trying to threaten you into? Would you walk into a court room and say..SOP your honor! No matter that "that italian woman" is lying!
. NOTHING is going to replace the fact that your kid NEEDS his father, NOTHING, no matter what you think. And you keeping him away is only HURTING EVERYONE. Get that!!!!!!!!!!
