impugning income question

[sotiredofit]

who is defending who, we dont know you or the x from Adam? you are only getting facts here based on what you tell us.

Who is defending whom?? You're kidding right?

Profmum, right after I started this thread there were 5 responses back to back by bitter members on this board vehemently claiming that they would offer no advice concerning monetary sanctions on this board because I'm trying to screw the ex. (just read the responses).

The contention was ex helped me to get an apartment so therefore he could lie to me about his income for three years. Therefore I deserve no monetary sanctions. Unbelievable! This from the name-calling members of this board.

 

[CourtClerk]

anybody else beginning to kind of understand that whole smothering thing???

Yeah...

However, for the record, I couldn't possibly feel lowered by someone so far beneath me I can't even see them anymore. But the clock hasn't struck 12.... yet.

 

[profmum]

Profmum, with all due respect, Ohiogal has decreed me the bad guy, despite the fact that my ex choked, smothered me and abused me since day one of the marriage. That is really sick, and even though he lied to me about my income for 3 years, I'm still the bad guy.

Despite that, your reply is at least resonable and mature-unlike the others who should be deeply ashamed-so I will respond. Yes, we all need to get over our divorce, but when the ex has lied to me about his income while negotiating a child support/alimony amount on a marital stipulation and I can prove that by documents he sent to an apartment complex, why shouldn't I? He lied so therefore I deserve monetary sanctions. That's pretty cut and dried.

If you can prove that he is capable of making more money in a settlement discussion about CS and alimony, legally speaking, then by all means go for it.. but you wont get "monetary sanctions". So spend your efforts appropriately not obsessively on determinig his income.

But your posts are all about the outrage of your bad marriage, your rage towards the x, your altercations with the smum, the abuse you suffered.. yes those were all bad times but it does not HAVE any bearing on the legal prceedings you are involved in and be prepard for more to come. x's can lie, distort the truth, lie again and the cycle can continue till your children are adults. You can choose to feel outraged by his lies and marriage you had with him, and get caught up in this vicious cycle or merely do what needs to be done with cold, clinical precision. I can tell you from personal experience, the latter approach will work the best for you.

And if you feel attacked by posters here, they are not attacks, they are the kind of questions etc that you will face in court, the legal system is not about politeness.. if you get this defensive and continue to adopt this raging attitude, it will hurt you.. a lot of us have seen our x's hang themselves with the same attitude...

And finally while the x may have been a jerk, your own conduct is hardly saintlike.. it takeds two to tango.