My 7 Year Old Daughter Punished For Wearing Pretty Dress On Picture Day!

[samsr]

Your So Considerate....Thanks!

I'm so sorry that I embarrassed you because I live in your state, Mr Hitler.

I missed the part when you were placed in control, must have been out playing with my kids...oh well.

Since this is YOUR state:

please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, help me, help me, have mercy on me your highness,
don't let them do this to me, ayudame,
socorro, auxilio, etc., etc.

I beg of you................

Listen, "dude", it's MY daughter were're talking here, not yours.
So keep following all your rules while
living in this fantasy world of theory,
not practice.

Your Humble Servant Who,
Unfortunately For You,
Lives In Your State

 

[stealth2]

So DID you ever read the Student Code of Conduct, sam?

 

[samsr]

Sure Did Read It, Stealth2!

Not only did I read it, I have it filed and I abide by it daily.
The main problem I have with it is the following:

It's ok for the school to ignore the policy when it's convenient for them, for example:

Just a week and a half ago, they sent us a letter that the next
day was "tag" day. Students were to bring $1.00 for the parent council organization and wear any outfit they wanted.
They do this like 5 or 6 times a year for various fund raising efforts
and we cooperate with those efforts.

So I guess it's ok when they bend their own rules but not ok when I do.

That, to me, is a blatant double standard.

Especially since my taxes help to pay for my daughters education.

It's just not right.

Sam

PS- When you try to make rules that are apparently etched in
stone, people get hurt. I have inquired about what they do with other students who don't come in uniform on any other regular
school day. I was told that they first get a letter to the parent,
then it's a conference request with the parent, then the child's parent is called in to either bring in a uniform or pick the child up.
In our situation, they chose to banish my 7 year old girl to an unsupervised auditorium environment on a first infraction.

It REALLY was not justified, period.

 

[stealth2]

The school has the discretion to have dress-down days whenever they please. Your child does not have the discretion to have a dress-down (or non-uniform day) whenever she pleases. It really is as simple as that.

 

[samsr]

Thanks for your response.

If that's not a blatant double standard,
I'm stumped.

So what your saying is:

They can make and break their own rules,
but the taxpayers that pay their salaries, can't.

If that is a true statement, then we parents
have been asleep at the wheel for a long time, for sure!
And that should be changed asap.

See, it's not "as simple" as you say it is!


Here's the LAW:


New Jersey Permanent Statutes
TITLE 18A EDUCATION

18A: 11-7, 11-8
Adoption of dress code policy for schools permitted

18A:11-7. Findings, declarations relative to school dress codes

1. The Legislature finds and declares that many educators believe that school dress can significantly influence pupil behavior and that schools that have adopted dress codes, including dress codes which require school uniforms and which prohibit clothing indicating membership in certain gangs, experience greater school pride and improved behavior in and out of the classroom. The Legislature further finds that to assist in controlling the environment in public schools, to facilitate and maintain an effective learning environment, and to keep the focus of the classroom on learning, school districts should be specifically authorized to implement uniform clothing requirements for their students.
L.1996,c.93,s.1.

18A:11-8. Adoption of dress code policy for schools permitted

2. a. A board of education may adopt a dress code policy to require that students wear a school uniform if the policy is requested by the principal, staff and parents of an individual school and if the board determines that the policy will enhance the school learning environment. Any policy adopted which requires the wearing of a uniform shall include a provision to assist economically disadvantaged students. The board shall hold a public hearing prior to the adoption of the policy and shall not implement the policy with less than three months' notice to the parents or guardians of the students. The specific uniform selected shall be determined by the principal, staff, and parents of the individual school.

b. The board of education may provide a method whereby parents may choose not to comply with an adopted school uniform policy. If the board provides such a method, a student shall not be penalized academically or otherwise discriminated against nor denied admittance to school if the student's parents choose not to comply with the school uniform policy.

c. A dress code policy adopted pursuant to this section shall not preclude students who participate in a nationally recognized youth organization which is approved by the board of education from wearing organization uniforms to school on days that the organization has scheduled a meeting.
L.1996,c.93,s.2


**********************


The board has not "provided me with the method" on how
I would go about exempting my child for any day the child
did not wear a uniform! Not a word of this in any of the code
of conduct policies or anywhere else.

And yet, they don't need an exemption for "tag" day?

All this rule stuff makes me sick. Rules ARE meant to be followed.
Like I said earlier, it all works out in theory, but just not in practice.

Thanks.
Sam

 

[stealth2]

Sam...

"The board of education may provide a method whereby parents may choose not to comply with an adopted school uniform policy. "

The operative word is "may". As in they can choose to allow you to opt out of the uniform policy, but they can choose not to. The school has the latitude to declare "uniform free days" - you do not. I really don't see why this is so difficult to understand. Be that as it may - you have no legal leg to stand on.

 

[JETX]

"So I guess it's ok when they bend their own rules but not ok when I do."
*** Give us a break!! Do you not understand that the school MAKES the rules and can allow exceptions to them. You don't make the rules, so you don't have the right (or option) to change them.
Just like you very probably have certain 'rules' at home, right?? And do you think that I should expect and demand the right to change them when I want?? Of course not!!

"That, to me, is a blatant double standard."
*** And you are blantantly wrong.

And the law that you quoted..... simply says that the school, if they chose, can establish a uniform policy. Other than that, it doesn't support your 'case' at all.

 

[CCPENNOCK]

Look it is real easy she wears her uniform just like the other kids on picture day at school, then you take her to Sears or where ever you want and get her picture taken in her pretty dress. If you don't want a picture of her in uniform then don't buy the school pictures. You have written your letters and you can always take your complaints in person to the principal or whom ever is in charge. CCP

 

[stealth2]

CCP - that is SOOOOOO unfair! Why should they have to pay for TWO sets of pictures because the school has some stupid dress code?

 

[hexeliebe]

GAWD I love this thread. A perfect example of children raising children.

I've seen a lot of people like this in my 50 years. Too afraid to take a stand for something they believe in when they were younger but now that they have children they're Abbey Hoffmann on a pulpit....

The only problem is jerks like this don't care the affect his rants and raves have on his child.

Oh well, until we require a license to become a parent anyone can apply.

 

[cbg]

"Why should they have to pay for TWO sets of pictures because the school has some stupid dress code?"

They don't. That's the whole point. Buying the school pictures is OPTIONAL.

 

[stealth2]

[BThey don't. That's the whole point. Buying the school pictures is OPTIONAL. [/B]

Whaa-a-a-a-a!!! But then she'll be the ONLY kid in school who doesn't order the pictures! Whaa-a-a-a!!! NOT FAIR!

 

[knotcops]

I feel sorry for this child. Can you imagine being raised by these parents.

 

[samsr]

Thanks again for your time.

The latest is that I have received a letter of apology from the principal. The school board is a having a special meeting to make it optional for uniforms on picture day and my daughter will be removed from her class at my request. So much for the rule of law.
I said it once and I'll say it again. Rules are meant to be enforced but when they are idiotic, all it takes is for a parent to complain.

**********
To Hexeliebe,

You started the name calling, so here goes:

Abby Hoffman was a drug addict, similar to yourself.
Get off the weed and crack and your brain might clear,
even if just for a little while until your next toke.
The "children raising children" comment shows you're an
overaged moron. I currently have a 20 year old scholar in college,
a 1st honor student in high school and my 7 year old.
I'm proud of how I'm raising my kids, stay away from the drugs,
it will kill you.
(your operative "still in the 60's" handle tells me much)
REHAB DOES WORK!

******************

To Stealth2,


I guess the operative word "may", has no value.
So much for the law.

***********************

To Knotcops,


Don't feel sorry for my kids, jerk.
Feel sorry for your idiotic self,
Then again, don't.

 

[CCPENNOCK]

Stealth2, You missed the point the parents don't have to buy the pictures. Usually parents have the option of buying a class picture if they want then taking their child elsewhere for individual pictures if they don't want to buy the school pictures. Not unfair, just the parents choice. I raised four, never had a problem doing this. CCP