Served papers from ex

[Ohiogal]

no I didn't file for support he served me papers two weeks ago because I wouldn't let his wife into my house when he came to see his son. If I dont get back child support, that's fine also as that is life, it is what it is. I've not denied him to see his son and he still can see his son but I don't have to let his wife in my home becuase I just had the baby and he can't be outdoors. I don't see where I would have to grow up here.

Why can't your baby be outdoors? How did you get the baby home? Was there an underground tunnel system between your house and hospital? And no you don't have to let his wife into your home HOWEVER you do need to realize that it is very likely that this baby will be out of your sight and going outdoors regardless of your wants and wishes once there is a court order.
This child NEVER goes outdoors? EVER? not to the store? The doctor? ANYWHERE?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

You do NOT have to invite the wife in. If dad wants to come visit, be cordial. Until there is a parenting plan in place that is court ordered, you don't HAVE to do anything. But remember that you have to deal with the father for the next 18 years. You are setting the tone for the next 18 years.

 

[aleayh01]

Ok, I see where you're going with this....not gonna go there, however, I DO realize that our son will be out of the house and yes, the doctor's office is OUTSIDE as well as the store and other outdoor errands. I'm totally awear of the hospital not being UNDER GROUND, he had to come in contact with the outdoors to come home, and? My point is this, when our son was 10 days old , his father took him to visit with him at his home and continued until our son developed an infection and had to go back into the above ground hospital. So, this NEVER, EVER coming outside thing, is not my attitude. His father can see him whenever, he choose not to at least compromise just for a few weeks until our son got better to come see our son at my house.

 

[Ohiogal]

Ok, I see where you're going with this....not gonna go there, however, I DO realize that our son will be out of the house and yes, the doctor's office is OUTSIDE as well as the store and other outdoor errands. I'm totally awear of the hospital not being UNDER GROUND, he had to come in contact with the outdoors to come home, and? My point is this, when our son was 10 days old , his father took him to visit with him at his home and continued until our son developed an infection and had to go back into the above ground hospital. So, this NEVER, EVER coming outside thing, is not my attitude. His father can see him whenever, he choose not to at least compromise just for a few weeks until our son got better to come see our son at my house.

he chose to compromise by coming to your house -- is that what you meant?
And I am glad you see where I was going with this. And read these forums. there are many mothers who believe that they make the rules and that the baby will never ever be away from them until they deem it is okay -- so the child not being able to be outdoors would fit right in with those postings. But I am glad that is not where you were heading with it. I congratulate you on that.

 

[aleayh01]

He chose not to come by the house when our son was sick because he told me that if his wife cant come inside, then he's not coming to see our son at all. I have read the treads and I see that many mothers try to make the rules, however, I dont give a rats a** if he wants to see his son outside my home, all I asked was that he compromise just for those few weeks until our son got better to see him at my house. He stated that he will see our son only if his wife was present at my home . I said no she cant come in and that's when he served me with papers.

But that's life Thanks for your advice straight forward and to the point, I like that

 

[aleayh01]

Let me clarify he could have seen our son at my house UNTIL he got better, then he could have taken him out to his home once the infection cleared.

 

[Ohiogal]

Let me clarify he could have seen our son at my house UNTIL he got better, then he could have taken him out to his home once the infection cleared.

And I applaud you sincerely and will gladly answer your questions. You are being a very mature parent. I apologize for misunderstanding.

 

[kmb1179]

OP, no, your ex's new wife has no reason to come into your home. If Daddy is saying that he won't see his son unless his wife is there, he's very immature. It may also be a case of wifey-poo telling him he can't come over unless she is there. Maybe some jealousy and mis-trust issues on her part?

I completely agree that your ex is a tard for even filing anything in court about this. His wife has no legal standing in any of this.

However, I do think it would be in the best interests of your son if you and the new wife can learn to get a long, at least somewhat. If she's married to his dad, she's going to be involved in your son's life, at least peripherally. I'm not saying that you have to be her BFF, and she certainly has absolutely no say in how you and your ex parent your child, but if all 3 adults can be cordial and maybe even friendly with one another, the child will benefit from that.

Just a thought.

 

[LdiJ]

I can live with waiting for the court to ORDER him to pay support plus BACK support from the time of our child's birth. That's life, it is what it is.

Question: Do I have to let him see our son before our scheduled hearing or can I wait until the judge ORDER his parenting time, since I have to wait for his ORDERED child support.

Technically no, you don't have to allow him to see your son. However, that's something that could bite you in the butt legally....however that applies ONLY to dad.

 

[jbowman]

I'm totally awear of the hospital not being UNDER GROUND, he had to come in contact with the outdoors to come home, and? My point is this, when our son was 10 days old , his father took him to visit with him at his home and continued until our son developed an infection and had to go back into the above ground hospital. .

OG, dont you just really like this girl? The "above ground" hospital. I love it. Great response!!

 

[Ohiogal]

OG, dont you just really like this girl? The "above ground" hospital. I love it. Great response!!

Yep I really do like her. And I was so willing to HATE her and go off on her and she totally defeated that by her response with the "above ground" hospital. She is not being an over-controlling mom like we normally see.

 

[aleayh01]

I've been reading the treats on this website and some of them are crazy. I understand the frustration in trying to convey LEGAL information to mothers who assume they are in control and to step-moms who overstep their boundries. This is my first child and first time being served. I completely agree that for the best interest of our son WE MUST be cordial and mature. As this would be in the best interest of our son.

 

[Ohiogal]

I've been reading the treats on this website and some of them are crazy. I understand the frustration in trying to convey LEGAL information to mothers who assume they are in control and to step-moms who overstep their boundries. This is my first child and first time being served. I completely agree that for the best interest of our son WE MUST be cordial and mature. As this would be in the best interest of our son.

Dang you got a good attitude. Please keep it and it will serve you will in court.

 

[wileybunch]

So aleayh01, did you decide to retain an attorney for this?

 

[aleayh01]

yep..... no doubt