Set my mind at ease...

[CJane]

If he doesn't remember that they will expire, then he is likely to expect the exchange to take place where you have been doing it for the last year. I would show up there, and then if he is a no show THEN proceed to his house.

That's sort of my plan... but that's also one of the days I wanted to be able to tell the Sheriff that he'll definitely be at X location... and if I don't know where I'm picking up the kids, I don't know where to tell the Sheriff.

I've also considered a 'domestic stand-by' request at his house on that day... they can serve him AND make sure I get the kids w/out incident.

Bleh. I really wish we'd had the hearing on Monday.

 

[Accountable]

I've also considered a 'domestic stand-by' request at his house on that day... they can serve him AND make sure I get the kids w/out incident.
.

This sounds like the best plan under the circumstances.

 

[Deebow59]

Cjane...... Not trying to change the subject, but I love your quote!!!! Good One.

 

[CJane]

So, the deputy just called me. Stupidhead was served at 936 this morning. The deputy told me to be careful when picking up the kids tomorrow night, and left me his cell phone # 'just in case'.

D'Man is going with me when I pick the girls up tomorrow.

I feel bad for the neighborhood cats.

 

[Bloopy]

That's great CJane. But I wouldn't bring D'Man to their house. Are you sticking with a public place?

Since you are such a sceeery person, your sceeery man may make things worse. Then he'll have restrining orders and court dates.

How 'bout spunky female who can be considered an objective third party should a witness be needed?

 

[CJane]

That's great CJane. But I wouldn't bring D'Man to their house. Are you sticking with a public place?

Yes, it's still public, as the restraining orders are still in effect.

This is what usually happens when I pick up the kids... and I'm not planning a deviation this time except that D'Man will be in the passenger seat...

We meet at a gas station in his town at 8 pm. He's actually usually about 10-15 minutes late. I park as near the main door as possible. He pulls in 2 or 3 spaces away from me and lets the kids out of the car. I pop the trunk of MY car for Wild's sax and Unruly's guitar and the kids pile in.

I never exit my car. If Ex has anything to say to me, he approaches ME and speaks to me through a cracked window. We drive away, usually w/out me even looking at him.

Since you are such a sceeery person, your sceeery man may make things worse. Then he'll have restrining orders and court dates.

I've thought about that, but he's really the only person who is available to 'make the drop' with me that late on a Sunday evening.

 

[Bloopy]

Oh, it all sounds good... I thought you might headed be headed to his house and that the RO expired. .. My bad.

 

[CJane]

Oh, it all sounds good... I thought you might headed be headed to his house and that the RO expired. .. My bad.

Nope, that's the next pick up on the 14th of Oct.

Interestingly, I asked the deputy about that yesterday too.

He said that in his experience, if there hasn't been a violation of the RO (and there hasn't) then it will not be extended. Also, that any extension of the RO has to be done via a hearing and I would already know about it.

However, he said that he would recommend that I arrive at the gas station on the 14th and wait 30 minutes. Then, if Stupidhead hasn't arrived, he recommended that I call the Sheriff's Dept and inform them that I am going to Stupidhead's house to retrieve my children. They will then call Stupidhead and see if a standby is required.

Seems like a lotta BS just to pick up the kids from the man I was married to for 10 years, huh?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

It's just a control thing CJane .... since y'all aren't married, he can control you, except by using the kids ...

 

[profmum]

It's just a control thing CJane .... since y'all aren't married, he can control you, except by using the kids ...

So true, I think having Dman in the driver's seat is smart..they want to control you in any way they can and it is only through the kids.. my Xfiles is starting down the same path.. Good luck, but I hope this long nightmare comes to an end soon for you! Your time to enjoy the little one's, life, work, liberty, D'man and everything in between!

 

[Ozark_Sophist]

Practice defensive driving tactics. Back into the parking space.

 

[peppier]

Practice defensive driving tactics. Back into the parking space.

That is good advice and she should leave the engine running.

 

[CJane]

Practice defensive driving tactics. Back into the parking space.

So funny... I actually started doing that - and parking where I can see the only 2 entrances for the lot - after the drop off when his wife pulled in in a friend's car that I didn't recognize and parked behind me so I couldn't get out til she 'let' me.

Of course, I'm the crazy/dangerous one.

 

[CJane]

Ok, I checked online today and found that Stupidhead has filed, as of 10/02 to extend the restraining orders. Conveniently enough, that's the Tuesday after being served w/the contempt papers.

ANYWAY... this is actually what I wanted to have happen and the way I see it, there are 2 courses of action.

1) Don't show up for the hearing (that I haven't been served for anyway) that's on the 16th and they'll be granted.

2) Show up and tell the judge that I was REALLY hoping this would happen, and make sure that the new orders include the public pick up as well.

Questions:

Which do y'all think is the best option, bearing in mind it'll require unpaid time off work?


Is the judge gonna think I'm crazy if I go in and I'm HAPPY that they've requested the extensions and I ask the judge to grant them?

Is it possible to request they be made permanent? Mutual?

 

[LdiJ]

Ok, I checked online today and found that Stupidhead has filed, as of 10/02 to extend the restraining orders. Conveniently enough, that's the Tuesday after being served w/the contempt papers.

ANYWAY... this is actually what I wanted to have happen and the way I see it, there are 2 courses of action.

1) Don't show up for the hearing (that I haven't been served for anyway) that's on the 16th and they'll be granted.

2) Show up and tell the judge that I was REALLY hoping this would happen, and make sure that the new orders include the public pick up as well.

Questions:

Which do y'all think is the best option, bearing in mind it'll require unpaid time off work?


Is the judge gonna think I'm crazy if I go in and I'm HAPPY that they've requested the extensions and I ask the judge to grant them?

Is it possible to request they be made permanent? Mutual?

I think that you should go....if for no other reason than to make sure that he doesn't try to claim that you have violated the restraining order....and to make sure that the new orders include the public pickup.

The judge won't think that you are crazy if you explain that it has actually made life easier for you as well.