summerdawn
Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA
I'm sorry for the new thread...I just got the stipulation that the father wants to agree on outside of court and it is nothing like what we agreed to in mediation.Judging by the spelling errors I think father's wife drafted it once again. I'm seriously in shock. It reads like this:
1. That the parties herein have reached an agreement (previously filed with the court) relating to the issues set to be heard on March 21, 2011,:
2. That the parties no longer wish to be heard on the above date and time;
3. Therefore, the parties hereby stipulate that the Order to Show Cause presently set for March 21, 2011 at 8:30 a.m. shall go off calendar. That no appearance is required by either party.
4. That the parties herein shall modify father’s visitation to include extra time in the summer
every Monday at 10:00am until Tuesday at 8:00pm, If the fathers days off change he shall give the mother advance notice of one week and the mother can decide to except changing the two days in the summer to the fathers new days off or leaving them at Monday until Tuesday.
5. In the event the children have any of the following: medical, behavior, academic, social, discipline, problems that include but are not limited to:
a. Lice
b. asthma
c. expulsions, failing grades, citations, or any thing else involving trouble at school
d. constantly breaking rules of a parent or teachers.
e. absences, tardiness or leaving early from school
The mother is to contact the father at once to relate said information and they shall come up with a parenting plan to find a solution to the problem.
6. In the event the children get lice the parents agree to the following course of action:
a. The children shall stay with the father for one week, at the beginning of said week the father shall treat their hair with lice killing product and spend the rest of the week picking out any eggs that remain, at the end of the week the father shall do the follow up treatment before sending them back to the mother.
b. The same day the children leave to go to the fathers, the mother shall bag up all the cloths, pillows, stuffed animals, blankets sheets, in every room, in an air tight bag and shall wash all said items she will need for the next week, leaving what remains in the bags for up to two weeks untouched, she will then treat every one in her household including her oldest children and herself with the toxic lice killing product or hair die if that is efficient, (
) then she shall proceed to vacuum the entire house and vehicle and or vehicles, furniture included, and spry with lice killing spray, then she shall repeat and do all those steps a week later.
7. Due to the lice epidemic at the children’s school the children shall wear heavy hair gel and keep their hair up while at school, both parents shall reinforce to the children not to share hair brushes or accessories, jackets or anything else that could transfer lice, and both parents shall remind them not to bump heads with other children.
8. Further phone communication is as follows:
a. parent shall call if suspects neglect or abuse (physical or emotional)
b. parent shall call if children or child seems to be using the parents against each other.
c. parent shall call if suspects the other parent is using or alienating the children against the other parent.
d. there shall be no insulting or blaming by the parents to the parents, they are only to have an attitude of finding a solution.
e. all phone communication shall be to the point following this example:
1. Problem
2 finding the solution
3. Agreeing on the solution
with no trailing away from the point at hand.
9 The parents agree to the following concerning who can and can not baby sit the children and for how long.
a. Only adults shall watch the minor children with each parent using there better judgment.
b. the mothers oldest son and daughter shall not watch the children for any length of time.
c. No one shall watch the minor children over night with out the consent of both
parents; this does not include family related by blood or law.
10. No third party corporal punishment, both parents shall enforce in each of there home an environment that is free from physical abuse, including: pushing, shoving, slapping over the head, any thing that would cause pain or discomfort, anything that is unwanted contact, only the mother and the father my spank the children, the children shall never go with out a meal do to their behavior.
11. Regarding the children’s school reports, parent teacher conferences, progress reports, letters or notes from the teachers or any other notifications from the school, the mother shall make copies and send it with the children to the fathers house, if the mother has no way of making copies then she shall send the original so the father can review then he shall send it back with the children.
12. All other orders that don’t conflict with this order shall remain in full force and effect.
What in the world?? It's like she went off and just typed up her own stipulation altogether. Father called me on th ephone yesterday and said that he does not agree to phone conversations unless it is an emergency. He said if we keep the court date on the 21st his attorney will let the judge know that he didn't agree to it in the mediator's office (but he did!) He says that since we didn't sign anything in the mediator's office, we didn't come to an agreement. The mediator said that we agreed nicely. I seriously don't know what is going on, we walked out of the mediator's office getting along great and now that he has discussed things with his wife he is saying he never said that stuff.
I'm sorry for the new thread...I just got the stipulation that the father wants to agree on outside of court and it is nothing like what we agreed to in mediation.Judging by the spelling errors I think father's wife drafted it once again. I'm seriously in shock. It reads like this:
1. That the parties herein have reached an agreement (previously filed with the court) relating to the issues set to be heard on March 21, 2011,:
2. That the parties no longer wish to be heard on the above date and time;
3. Therefore, the parties hereby stipulate that the Order to Show Cause presently set for March 21, 2011 at 8:30 a.m. shall go off calendar. That no appearance is required by either party.
4. That the parties herein shall modify father’s visitation to include extra time in the summer
every Monday at 10:00am until Tuesday at 8:00pm, If the fathers days off change he shall give the mother advance notice of one week and the mother can decide to except changing the two days in the summer to the fathers new days off or leaving them at Monday until Tuesday.
5. In the event the children have any of the following: medical, behavior, academic, social, discipline, problems that include but are not limited to:
a. Lice
b. asthma
c. expulsions, failing grades, citations, or any thing else involving trouble at school
d. constantly breaking rules of a parent or teachers.
e. absences, tardiness or leaving early from school
The mother is to contact the father at once to relate said information and they shall come up with a parenting plan to find a solution to the problem.
6. In the event the children get lice the parents agree to the following course of action:
a. The children shall stay with the father for one week, at the beginning of said week the father shall treat their hair with lice killing product and spend the rest of the week picking out any eggs that remain, at the end of the week the father shall do the follow up treatment before sending them back to the mother.
b. The same day the children leave to go to the fathers, the mother shall bag up all the cloths, pillows, stuffed animals, blankets sheets, in every room, in an air tight bag and shall wash all said items she will need for the next week, leaving what remains in the bags for up to two weeks untouched, she will then treat every one in her household including her oldest children and herself with the toxic lice killing product or hair die if that is efficient, (
) then she shall proceed to vacuum the entire house and vehicle and or vehicles, furniture included, and spry with lice killing spray, then she shall repeat and do all those steps a week later.7. Due to the lice epidemic at the children’s school the children shall wear heavy hair gel and keep their hair up while at school, both parents shall reinforce to the children not to share hair brushes or accessories, jackets or anything else that could transfer lice, and both parents shall remind them not to bump heads with other children.
8. Further phone communication is as follows:
a. parent shall call if suspects neglect or abuse (physical or emotional)
b. parent shall call if children or child seems to be using the parents against each other.
c. parent shall call if suspects the other parent is using or alienating the children against the other parent.
d. there shall be no insulting or blaming by the parents to the parents, they are only to have an attitude of finding a solution.
e. all phone communication shall be to the point following this example:
1. Problem
2 finding the solution
3. Agreeing on the solution
with no trailing away from the point at hand.
9 The parents agree to the following concerning who can and can not baby sit the children and for how long.
a. Only adults shall watch the minor children with each parent using there better judgment.
b. the mothers oldest son and daughter shall not watch the children for any length of time.
c. No one shall watch the minor children over night with out the consent of both
parents; this does not include family related by blood or law.
10. No third party corporal punishment, both parents shall enforce in each of there home an environment that is free from physical abuse, including: pushing, shoving, slapping over the head, any thing that would cause pain or discomfort, anything that is unwanted contact, only the mother and the father my spank the children, the children shall never go with out a meal do to their behavior.
11. Regarding the children’s school reports, parent teacher conferences, progress reports, letters or notes from the teachers or any other notifications from the school, the mother shall make copies and send it with the children to the fathers house, if the mother has no way of making copies then she shall send the original so the father can review then he shall send it back with the children.
12. All other orders that don’t conflict with this order shall remain in full force and effect.
What in the world?? It's like she went off and just typed up her own stipulation altogether. Father called me on th ephone yesterday and said that he does not agree to phone conversations unless it is an emergency. He said if we keep the court date on the 21st his attorney will let the judge know that he didn't agree to it in the mediator's office (but he did!) He says that since we didn't sign anything in the mediator's office, we didn't come to an agreement. The mediator said that we agreed nicely. I seriously don't know what is going on, we walked out of the mediator's office getting along great and now that he has discussed things with his wife he is saying he never said that stuff.
