What Can I Do?!?!?!?!!?

[candi4687]

Tennessee case,
My ex has taken visitation with my children for the past 2 times he was supposed to have gotten them. Anyways I have learned from being associated with this wanna be father that it is best to DOCUMENT EVERYTHING! When I send the kids to his home on weekends I have to provide them clothes. I document every single piece of clothes that they take with them. The first time I even made him a copy of what they had so that once they were packing their things they could have a check list to assure they got all their clothes back. Any ways I went this Sunday to pick my children up from their visitation and they only had 3 shirts in their bag. I questioned my ex about this and he claims that his mom has the clothes because the children stayed there durring their visitation and she was not going to let me have the clothes. I called her and sure enough I got cursed out because I ask for my childrens clothes that I had bought and sent there with them. Mind you as I said before I even have documentation of EVERY stich of clothes. No pictures but trust me that did cross my mind since I know how these people can be! Is there ANYTHING that I can do to get my kids clothes back?!?!?!? I can't afford to keep buying them clothes and right now they are limited as it is. They have even kept my son's coat and its below freezing outside. I admit I did break down and buy him another since then buy should I have to do that because they want to play childish games with my kids and their things?
WHAT CAN I DO?!!?!?!?!?!?!?

 

[stealth2]

Send them in/with clothes that you don't mind losing. Frankly? Go to your local thrift shop - you can get good kids' clothes for cheap.

 

[candi4687]

There is nothing that I can do? They have plenty of clothes there at their dads now besides why should he keep the clothes that I bought and I go out and buy them cheap clothes for school? My fiance and I have 6 kids, two are mine but still money is not something that is so easily spent and frankly speaking I can't even afford that right now because I have to spend gas money taking them back and forth down there and going their for court and my ex wont even pay childsupport until he is threatened with jail. I WANT THESE clothes back. They are nice school clothes and his mother WONT give any of it back!

 

[stealth2]

Then take him to court. Which is going to take a while and also cost money.

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

Well then what about you just send them next time with the clothes on their backs? Dad has the other clothes right? SO it's not like you wouldnt be sending them where they didn't have any.... My ex and I don't send clothes back and forth. He has clothes for the kids when they are with him and I have clothes for when they are with me. Plus they like it that way. They have favorite outfits at both parents house.

 

[candi4687]

Sure he has clothes at his home for them, THE ONES I SENT there to be returned! This is the first time he has had visitation with them in over 8 months and I guess he just threw out their old clothes. Thats just it I am going to court on Jan 25th can I do anything about it then?. I cant afford a lawyer and my childsupport goes through the state so they handle that but they NEED their clothes! Hell to be honest he probably will wind up going back to jail to finish up his 5 months sentence for non payment and what can I do then because he wont even be able to see him. Besides its his MOTHER that is keeping their clothes. He dont even live there thats just a babysitter for him since he cant be a full time dad even part time!

 

[BelizeBreeze]

As a crusty old broad that I love to anger is wont to say "Is this a hill you really want to die on?"

 

[candi4687]

Look basically my children only have a limited amount of winter clothes and I had to send them with these clothes on the 2 visits and now they MAY have 2-3 sets of warm clothes and I even documented what was sent but still they kept their clothes. I can't afford more and what am I supposed to do just make my children wear the same clothes over and over each week because my ex husbands mother wants to be a bitch and steal their clothes that I provided them with? besides this they would not even make my son wear a coat when it was below freezing outside and now he is sick. They would not send his coat back with him and so I am the one who has to pay? I am sorry but this is not an issue between me, himor his bitchy mother but of my kids and weither or not I can wake them up in the morning and be able to put warm clothes on their back!! I JUST DONT GET IT!

 

[CORRINA6209]

Look basically my children only have a limited amount of winter clothes and I had to send them with these clothes on the 2 visits and now they MAY have 2-3 sets of warm clothes and I even documented what was sent but still they kept their clothes. I can't afford more and what am I supposed to do just make my children wear the same clothes over and over each week because my ex husbands mother wants to be a bitch and steal their clothes that I provided them with? besides this they would not even make my son wear a coat when it was below freezing outside and now he is sick. They would not send his coat back with him and so I am the one who has to pay? I am sorry but this is not an issue between me, himor his bitchy mother but of my kids and weither or not I can wake them up in the morning and be able to put warm clothes on their back!! I JUST DONT GET IT!

call the police

 

[stealth2]

call the police

Who will do nothing about this situation.

 

[stepmom&mom]

That's not necessarily true....




They might laugh.

 

[Gracie3787]

Tennessee case,
My ex has taken visitation with my children for the past 2 times he was supposed to have gotten them. Anyways I have learned from being associated with this wanna be father that it is best to DOCUMENT EVERYTHING! When I send the kids to his home on weekends I have to provide them clothes. I document every single piece of clothes that they take with them. The first time I even made him a copy of what they had so that once they were packing their things they could have a check list to assure they got all their clothes back. Any ways I went this Sunday to pick my children up from their visitation and they only had 3 shirts in their bag. I questioned my ex about this and he claims that his mom has the clothes because the children stayed there durring their visitation and she was not going to let me have the clothes. I called her and sure enough I got cursed out because I ask for my childrens clothes that I had bought and sent there with them. Mind you as I said before I even have documentation of EVERY stich of clothes. No pictures but trust me that did cross my mind since I know how these people can be! Is there ANYTHING that I can do to get my kids clothes back?!?!?!? I can't afford to keep buying them clothes and right now they are limited as it is. They have even kept my son's coat and its below freezing outside. I admit I did break down and buy him another since then buy should I have to do that because they want to play childish games with my kids and their things?
WHAT CAN I DO?!!?!?!?!?!?!?

You really have 3 choices:

1. Continue as you are, sending clothes, buying more, and continuing to get upset.

OR

2. Go to thrift store, buy kids some decent used clothes (including coats), put into writing to ex that due to him and his mother keeping the kids' clothes that these will be thier "visiting Dad clothes" with instructions that the clothes shall be kept at Dad's house, it will be Dad's responsibility to replace clothes as needed. keep a copy of letter for yourself, and then send kids to visit with only the set of clothes they are wearing. Oh, yes, Dad will complain, threaten, and call you a bad mother- but- that is HIS problem, not yours.

OR

3. File a petition to modify visitation, ask the court to put into order that Dad must provide visiting clothes that are to be kept at his house. (that is an expensive way to go, but if it really bothers you that much it might be worth it.)

Personally, I believe that you are making a mountain out of a molehill because it is an easy problem to fix, but that is your choice. However, there are 2 things I'd like to advise you on, One- If it goes to court you would only be hurting your case if you bring up the fact that you live with a man who has 4 kids and money is tight. And Two- At the beginning of your post you stated: "My ex has taken visitation with MY children...." They are also HIS children, for their sakes you need to remember that.

 

[nextwife]

Good grief. I presume they not only go to dad's wearing clothes, but they RETURN wearing clothes as well? I only get a few months If that)out of my kid's clothes anyway, as little-string-bean is already too long for them after a few wearings.

 

[haiku]

how timely, I just got home from shopping, bought my little one a new jacket on clearance for eight dollars! At that price I could have bought 3 or 4 and really not think twice about where she leaves them, because even kids who don't spend weekends at dads house have a tendency to have dissappearing clothes...It pays to shop thrift and clearance as a parent no matter what the situation.....

 

[BelizeBreeze]

how timely, I just got home from shopping, bought my little one a new jacket on clearance for eight dollars! At that price I could have bought 3 or 4 and really not think twice about where she leaves them, because even kids who don't spend weekends at dads house have a tendency to have dissappearing clothes...It pays to shop thrift and clearance as a parent no matter what the situation.....

$8????
The last time I took my daughters shopping it cost me $1,400

I want to TRADE!!!!!!!!!!!