Served papers from ex

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Since then, Dorkboy doesn't even bring her to the courthouse. However, he has to check in with her via cellphone all the time he is there.

Our county courthouse does not allow ANY electronic device in the courthouse. No cellphones, computers, cameras, recorders - nothing. When my X had to get someone to bring my daughter to the courthouse, the GF had to go to the car to get it.

 

[StampGirl]

Our county courthouse does not allow ANY electronic device in the courthouse. No cellphones, computers, cameras, recorders - nothing. When my X had to get someone to bring my daughter to the courthouse, the GF had to go to the car to get it.

Yep so about every 30 min or so he would disappear (the last time we did mediation) and I finally asked him what he was doing. He sheepishly admitted that he had to call her so she could make sure we weren't talking before meeting with the mediator. Wifey has serious trust issues esp when it comes to me and Dorkboy. WHY I have no clue. She needs to be worried about his girlfriends!! ha ha

 

[aleayh01]

I just found out that here in GA, no THIRD PARTIES are allowed in any court hearings. The case manager stated that it causes way too much caios....

 

[kmb1179]

I just found out that here in GA, no THIRD PARTIES are allowed in any court hearings. The case manager stated that it causes way too much caios....

Good deal. One less thing to worry about.

If I were in your position, here is what I would do:

Ignore the wife. She's nothing. Don't be ugly. Don't be anything. Act as though she doesn't exist.

Inform your ex one more time, nicely but firmly, that until the baby is fully receovered from his infection, that YOUR EX is more than welcome to come visit his son at your house. His wife is not welcome in your home. Period. You do not need to justify anything to him.

After that, ignore him as well. If he wants to make arrangements to come see baby, great. If he starts in about the wife coming, too, end the conversation, telling him that you have already stated your position on this and will not do so again.

If he choses not to come see his baby because his wife can't come, so be it. Keep a diary and document conversations. You never know when you might need it. Keep taking the high road on this.

All you can do is keep on keeping on. As long as you continue to act like the adult here, the only one who will look bad is your ex.

Let him know that when your son is fully recovered from his infection, he is welcome to pick him and visit with him in his home, with his wife there.

Hang in there. From my past experiences, it will get better.

 

[aleayh01]

So kmb1179, let me ask you a quick question. This may sound petty as heck but every now and again I slip into this vendictive b****. Do you think I should allow my ex to take all items such as carseat, stroller, pampers, wipes, basinet and possible clothing with him on his parenting time or should I explain to him that he need to purchase those thing on his own since he did not purchase these items prior to the birth of my child.

 

[kmb1179]

So kmb1179, let me ask you a quick question. This may sound petty as heck but every now and again I slip into this vendictive b****. Do you think I should allow my ex to take all items such as carseat, stroller, pampers, wipes, basinet and possible clothing with him on his parenting time or should I explain to him that he need to purchase those thing on his own since he did not purchase these items prior to the birth of my child.

No, it doesn't sound petty. What do you feel most comfortable doing?

I personally think he should get his own carseat, stroller, and basinet. What if there were ever an emergency and he had to get your son last minute? He needs to be prepared.

Pamper and wipes, he should have on hand as well. It wouldn't hurt to throw a few in baby's bag when he goes to visit dad. Put several wipes in a Ziplock bag and put them in baby's bag. Just make sure you let dad know that he needs to get a supply for his house, as you will not provide everything everytime.

Clothes? I think dad should have a few things of his own for baby, but that can be hard. Babies outgrown things so quickly. If you are ok with sending clothes for baby with dad, make sure dad understands that those clothes need to come back with baby.

Hope this helps.

 

[kmb1179]

"If you are ok with sending clothes for baby with dad, make sure dad understands that those clothes need to come back with baby."

Also forgot to add that if getting the clothes back becomes a problem, inform dad that you will no longer supply clothes for baby when baby visits him and that he will need to have clothes on hand for baby. Inform him when baby reaches a new size so that he can get the correct things.

I know it's a lot easier said than done. You and dad will just need to try to work things out as best as possible and see what works for you guys. I know it's hard when wifey-poo will be putting her 2 cents in at every turn.

Try your best to just ignore her and deal with dad.

 

[kmb1179]

Oh, and I can not stress enough:

DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT!

It's tedious, but necessary. If you can walk into a court room fully prepared and with all your ducks in a row, that right there is half the battle.

I'm not sure of the laws in your state regarding recording of conversations, but when I get back from picking the kids up from school I will research that.

In my state, we can record our conversations with someone else without informing them that they are being recorded. We can not record the conversation of 2 other parties, but the law here is that only 1 party to the conversation needs to know that it is being recorded, even if that is the party doing the recording.

If you can record the conversations legally that you have with daddy, I would reccomend doing so. Email is also a good tool. That way, everything is right there in black and white.

I will be back in a bit and will see what I can find for your state regarding recording conversations.

 

[aleayh01]

Gottcha... I also wonder how the courts would view the ex and myself living 45 minutes away for parenting time. He has no car but the car that's in wifey's name and she told him he could only use it to pick up his son if she's in it.

 

[CJane]

Gottcha... I also wonder how the courts would view the ex and myself living 45 minutes away for parenting time. He has no car but the car that's in wifey's name and she told him he could only use it to pick up his son if she's in it.

It's standard that the parent receiving the visitation picks up the child.

And... usually 'any competent third party' can pick up the child unless otherwise ordered. So WIFEY could p/u the baby w/out daddy being in the car.

 

[aleayh01]

CJane can request or sign a form asking that no third party pick up our child?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Beware of what you ask for because it has been known to bite you in the behind. Imagine paperwork that says no 3rd party pickup. You need to go pick up the baby but you are stuck somewhere. No other competent person could pick up for you either.

 

[CJane]

CJane can request or sign a form asking that no third party pick up our child?

You need to look at this a little more objectively.

Let's say that you're supposed to be picking Baby up from Dad after visitation.

You go out to leave and your car won't start. You call a friend and she's willing to pick up baby for you.

Do you want Dad to be able to refuse to turn the child over JUST BECAUSE it's not directly to you?

 

[CJane]

Beware of what you ask for because it has been known to bite you in the behind. Imagine paperwork that says no 3rd party pickup. You need to go pick up the baby but you are stuck somewhere. No other competent person could pick up for you either.

Meanie.

 

[aleayh01]

Ginny J....I see what you're saying