You know, I sympathize with your situation and your point of view, but there are at least a few situations where long term alimony is valid. Think about a truly permanently disabled spouse who truly cannot work and gets kicked to the curb. Yes, maybe they qualify for SSDI, but maybe only for 900.00 a month. I see long term alimony being valid there.
I appreciate that Ld. However, no one in the reform movement is arguing that there are times it is valid.
In the FL reform bill, as well as our current NJ reform bill, discretion is still allowed. I agree that there are elderly women who may have been the stay at home mom as that was the societal norm of the times and if they have not remarried and are not co-habitating then you simply have to bear up. However, the payor should be allowed to retire. Period the end. And that means that both have to live on their social security and their retirement - half of which was awarded to the ex at the time of the divorce. Courts don't allow that. Instead the payor has to pay the same amount from their retirement funds - which is commonly known as double dipping and is expressly stated to be exempt - but judges just continually order it paid from retirement anyway...which means the payor is unable to afford to retire. I won't even discuss the hoops they make you go through for co-habitation. If you have $60k and believe that perhaps a 10-15% reduction is worth it - then go for it. Otherwise, don't waste your time, money or resources attempting to prove the court's definition of co-habitation.
If the courts actually modified alimony awards for changes of circumstances - as is outlined in the statutes - most likely, there wouldn't be such an outcry for reform. The problem is that alimony is misunderstood and its purpose really needs to be defined in state statutes. It doesn't matter if someone gets kicked to the curb. Most states have no-fault divorce. Yet, when someone says alimony the immediate perception is that of some rich middle aged executive throwing wifey to the curb for a 20 something admin. That's just a myth/misconception.
The facts are that alimony is awarded in childless divorces, it is awarded despite both parties working, it is awarded to abusers, it is awarded to people who wanted to terminate the marriage, it is awarded to the unfaithful (in most states). There is no rhyme or reason to duration or amount. The NJ Bar recently had a conference during which they presented 4 judges the same set of circumstances. Every judge had a different ruling.
To use your example - the President of my reform group is divorced and pays alimony to her ex husband. He has a long history of drug/alcohol abuse. After the physical abuse started to escalate and interfere with her work (RN), she finally filed for divorce. He then filed for disability and began seeing doctors. Ultimately, just prior to the divorce, he was approved for disability as a result of depression. So there is an example of the situation that you noted.
However, also during the divorce, he decided to run her off of the road, her car rolled multiple times, ultimately landing upside down in a ditch. She was unconscious in the vehicle. Fortunately, an off-duty state trooper witnessed the whole thing, called for back up, then wrestled the tire iron away from her husband (he had proceeded to bash the side doors of the vehicle with it) and arrested him. (He was convicted.) She was taken by ambulance - yada, yada. The damage done to her hands and arms was extensive. She had multiple surgeries with Dr's trying to repair her injuries. Three long pain filled years later, she was still unable to adequately perform her duties and was also declared permanently disabled as a result of the injuries that she had sustained. To this day, the judge refuses to modify her alimony. Alimony awarded by the way, when her ex was serving his time. No fault states do not allow the introduction of criminal evidence into family court. This is just one problem with alimony. Once you're in the system it is difficult to get out. Even those lucky enough to obtain a downward modification, rarely are granted over 10% less.
During divorce, the attorneys and judges look at 2 things - how much you earn and how long you were married and then they make a decision. That being said, end the charade. Develop guidelines and calculators similar to child support. There are always going to be the outlying cases and for those, judicial discretion is still in play. NONE of the alimony reform bills are attempting to take alimony off of the books. They want standardized formulas and an end date that allows folks who have worked their whole lives to retire.