Refuses to give cell phone numer

[TammyMay]

I asked you a question.

Oh sorry!

This is my answer.


"All parents shall keep contact information current and each shall notify the other in writing of any changes. Each parent shall maintain a working telephone.

Each parent shall have the right to contact the child(ren) by telephone at the residence, or location of the other parent with reasonable frequency, during reasonable hours. Unless an emergency arises, "reasonable frequency is defined as once per day. "Reasonable hours" is defined as 8:00 am through 8:00 pm. "Reasonable frequency" is defined as one-half(1/2) hour per call. Each parent has a duty to promptly return telephone calls place by the other and to see the the child due the same. The child(ren) shall be allowed to initiate telephone calls, during any period of parenting time."


Sooooo....it violates this. For NO reason.

 

[TammyMay]

And I feel they are picking and choosing when I can contact the child just to have control. Yes, it is about control. I have never had any when it comes to the child and visitation. I have been keeping documents of situations regarding this since 2011.

I just think its time to take it all to court.

 

[Proserpina]

Look. I get that. If he's not complying with the court order, take him back to court. If the court thinks it's worth modifying or otherwise addressing the order, then they'll do something.

You still didn't answer the question though. You specifically said:

t is not to call my child while they are driving. It is for security reasons. Do you think that just because I will have the daycares phone number, that means I will call while the child is in the middle of class or nap? No, it is simply for security reasons.

What security reasons?

 

[TammyMay]

Look. I get that. If he's not complying with the court order, take him back to court. If the court thinks it's worth modifying or otherwise addressing the order, then they'll do something.

You still didn't answer the question though. You specifically said:



What security reasons?

The same purpose as having the Daycare phone number. Just to have that information if need be. Just the same reason we have in our "trip Itinerary" section that each parent is to provide departure time and date, hotel phone number and address..etc.

I feel that is in place for security reasons and joint custody matters. No parent is entitled to hold any information regarding the child.

I may be wrong. That is how I respond to information to the Father because that is exactly what is stated in our guidelines.

 

[TammyMay]

Look. I get that. If he's not complying with the court order, take him back to court. If the court thinks it's worth modifying or otherwise addressing the order, then they'll do something.

You still didn't answer the question though. You specifically said:



What security reasons?

Also, same as this reason...

Let's turn the situation around.

Say I am taking night classes 5 nights a week and the child is cared for by a babysitter for an hour each night. 5pm-6pm

I refuse to give the Father the contact information of the babysitter.


This is how I see it. Please tell me how it is different.

 

[cbg]

In the scenario you present, you are refusing to give out someone else's number. The babysitter would still have the right to give her own number to Dad.

In the situation that's actually happening, step-mom is refusing to give her own number to you.

What circumstances are you expecting to happen that it would be vital for you to contact your child right that very minute? What is the likelihood of something happening that couldn't wait until the child got to daycare (or home)?

 

[Zigner]

I suspect that, if you take this to court, you will see a much different order. You do NOT have the "right" to contact the child at any moment that the child is not with you. You just don't. Your order is very liberal and you are STILL causing waves. Expect a much more restrictive/specific order if you decide to take this to court.

ETA: To be clear, I mean that the times for contact will be much better defined.

 

[TammyMay]

I understand what you are saying...

What I am saying is that each parent is entitled to have all information regarding the child. Whereabouts, addresses, phone names and phone numbers...etc.

Why is this simple cell phone request an issue? It bothers me. It gives me an uneasy feeling. And because of our previous situations with this. What if the step-mom and the child were out and about for a whole day- say 730-10 that evening.

I contact the home to talk to the child. Dad is there, but refuses to answer or talk to me and explain things (this has happened before, many times). I contact the Dad's cell phone...again he ignores.


I am just not able to tell my child I love them on that day because he is with the step-mom and she refuses to give her cell phone out?

 

[TammyMay]

In the scenario you present, you are refusing to give out someone else's number. The babysitter would still have the right to give her own number to Dad.

In the situation that's actually happening, step-mom is refusing to give her own number to you.

What circumstances are you expecting to happen that it would be vital for you to contact your child right that very minute? What is the likelihood of something happening that couldn't wait until the child got to daycare (or home)?

So should I ask Dad for her cell phone? Would he then be required to give it to me?

 

[Eekamouse]

She could ignore your calls, too.

 

[TammyMay]

I suspect that, if you take this to court, you will see a much different order. You do NOT have the "right" to contact the child at any moment that the child is not with you. You just don't. Your order is very liberal and you are STILL causing waves. Expect a much more restrictive/specific order if you decide to take this to court.

ETA: To be clear, I mean that the times for contact will be much better defined.

This means that I do not have a right to contact the child at any moment the child is not with me?

All parents shall keep contact information current and each shall notify the other in writing of any changes. Each parent shall maintain a working telephone.

Each parent shall have the right to contact the child(ren) by telephone at the residence, or location of the other parent with reasonable frequency, during reasonable hours. Unless an emergency arises, "reasonable frequency is defined as once per day. "Reasonable hours" is defined as 8:00 am through 8:00 pm. "Reasonable frequency" is defined as one-half(1/2) hour per call. Each parent has a duty to promptly return telephone calls place by the other and to see the the child due the same. The child(ren) shall be allowed to initiate telephone calls, during any period of parenting time."

 

[TammyMay]

She could ignore your calls, too.

What would be the purpose of that? If all am wanting to do is have my one daily phone call with my child?

 

[cbg]

No, he would not. If she does not want you to have her cell phone number, no one but a judge can force her to give it to you and I'm not entirely sure a judge can. Anyone, be it a step-mother, a babysitter, or whoever, has the right to decide who gets their cell phone number.

IF it should happen that they keep the child out all day and you don't have the opportunity to talk to him, THEN you have something to take to court. But demanding that you MUST have step mom's cell phone JUST IN CASE Dad decides to violate the order is not a right you have.

 

[TammyMay]

That answers it then, thank you.

Co-parenting is hard. Thanks again.

 

[Eekamouse]

How often do they have the kid? Why is it imperative that you be able to call the child to tell him you love him on their time? Are you afraid the kid's going to forget?