What is the name of your state? Georgia
ok...this is going to be a novel and I apologize for that ahead of time. I want to be sure I include everything and the reasons behind it. I have read the post of another mom here who moved and do not wish to make the same mistakes.
I recently married someone from another state. He has small children and we have been commuting to keep his relationship intact and strong. Unfortunately, in the last two months there have been changes to our work situation that will prohibit us from being able to do this anymore. My children are 14 and 11. His are under 5 years old.
Let me say this, we have been divorced over two years, my ex and I work exceptionally well together in regards to our children. There is no animosity between us and what was there when we were married was confined to us and neither of us considered pain or what not caused by the other during the marriage to be something that should involve our children. The relationship with our children is totally separate from what happened between us and our relationship as parents is totally different from what it was as spouses. We (my ex and I) actually visit with each other and maintain a close friendship despite the extreme pain throughout our marriage and subsequent divorce. Through this we have created an environment that has allowed my children not only to cope and know that they still have both parents and both love them but also they thrive. In fact, just as an example, my oldest daughter's grades in school have soared.
The divorce decree as it stands is joint legal custody, with me designated as primary physical guardian. He was given standard visitation of EOW and was to pay child support. In the divorce papers he entirely responsible for pick up and delivery of the children for visitation. We personally worked out with one another a two week schedule with each parent. They have always had access to the other parent no matter the time of day or night when needed. He pays no child support since he literally has them with him the same amount of time I do and provides for them during that time. We each maintain a literal home (clothing, personal items of theirs, paying for school lunches, etc.) separately and independent of the other.
The issue is this: In order for my husband to maintain his relationship with his children who are much smaller (thus do not have the memory and established relationship to their dad that mine do) we have to move out of state to be in the area. I have my own business that has taken a severe financial hit and I expect it to take further hits in the near future. The main client has had financial problems and that has translated to less money for my business. We have conducted job searches in both places and have gotten vastly better response in the area where my husband's children reside. So...in order to live and maintain his relationship, we have no real choice but to move and seek other employment before the business dries completely up.
I firmly believe that the best place for my children is with me. That is for several reasons, not the least of which is that they are female and as such I relate to their issues and development better. I have, of course, spoken with my children's father on several occasions about this move. He is not happy about it but understands the need. It is understood between us that each would do all they can to facilitate time on holidays and breaks with their dad as well as communication on very regular basis. Both of them have web cams, instant messengers, their own computers, and phone access for talking to their dad whenever they would want to.
So....after all that...my question is...what is the best way to go about making this move so that I do not fall into any legal potholes? Will a certified letter or a letter signed by both of us be enough to constitute notification prior to the event? Would emails constitute? I do not expect my ex-husband to file anything in court. I do want to be prepared in the off chance he does though.
Please understand that I am absolutely sick about this. My nerves are shot and I have cried myself to sleep more times than I can count about it. I know that this is a legal forum; however, you all seem to be very intelligent people and I would like to hear any point of view I may not have seen or hear any advice that would help this situation so that my husband, my ex, and I are able to maintain strong healthy relationships with our children.
ok...this is going to be a novel and I apologize for that ahead of time. I want to be sure I include everything and the reasons behind it. I have read the post of another mom here who moved and do not wish to make the same mistakes.
I recently married someone from another state. He has small children and we have been commuting to keep his relationship intact and strong. Unfortunately, in the last two months there have been changes to our work situation that will prohibit us from being able to do this anymore. My children are 14 and 11. His are under 5 years old.
Let me say this, we have been divorced over two years, my ex and I work exceptionally well together in regards to our children. There is no animosity between us and what was there when we were married was confined to us and neither of us considered pain or what not caused by the other during the marriage to be something that should involve our children. The relationship with our children is totally separate from what happened between us and our relationship as parents is totally different from what it was as spouses. We (my ex and I) actually visit with each other and maintain a close friendship despite the extreme pain throughout our marriage and subsequent divorce. Through this we have created an environment that has allowed my children not only to cope and know that they still have both parents and both love them but also they thrive. In fact, just as an example, my oldest daughter's grades in school have soared.
The divorce decree as it stands is joint legal custody, with me designated as primary physical guardian. He was given standard visitation of EOW and was to pay child support. In the divorce papers he entirely responsible for pick up and delivery of the children for visitation. We personally worked out with one another a two week schedule with each parent. They have always had access to the other parent no matter the time of day or night when needed. He pays no child support since he literally has them with him the same amount of time I do and provides for them during that time. We each maintain a literal home (clothing, personal items of theirs, paying for school lunches, etc.) separately and independent of the other.
The issue is this: In order for my husband to maintain his relationship with his children who are much smaller (thus do not have the memory and established relationship to their dad that mine do) we have to move out of state to be in the area. I have my own business that has taken a severe financial hit and I expect it to take further hits in the near future. The main client has had financial problems and that has translated to less money for my business. We have conducted job searches in both places and have gotten vastly better response in the area where my husband's children reside. So...in order to live and maintain his relationship, we have no real choice but to move and seek other employment before the business dries completely up.
I firmly believe that the best place for my children is with me. That is for several reasons, not the least of which is that they are female and as such I relate to their issues and development better. I have, of course, spoken with my children's father on several occasions about this move. He is not happy about it but understands the need. It is understood between us that each would do all they can to facilitate time on holidays and breaks with their dad as well as communication on very regular basis. Both of them have web cams, instant messengers, their own computers, and phone access for talking to their dad whenever they would want to.
So....after all that...my question is...what is the best way to go about making this move so that I do not fall into any legal potholes? Will a certified letter or a letter signed by both of us be enough to constitute notification prior to the event? Would emails constitute? I do not expect my ex-husband to file anything in court. I do want to be prepared in the off chance he does though.
Please understand that I am absolutely sick about this. My nerves are shot and I have cried myself to sleep more times than I can count about it. I know that this is a legal forum; however, you all seem to be very intelligent people and I would like to hear any point of view I may not have seen or hear any advice that would help this situation so that my husband, my ex, and I are able to maintain strong healthy relationships with our children.
