50/50

[jekyl007]

but even older children...once they start school would that actualy be a reasonable schedule? How in the world would parents that live 3 hours apart keep the child on that schedule. It makes no sense to me.

The agreement was that when he turned 4 it would go back to court *if they couldnt agree in mediation* to see who got their son for school year and stuff like that...

but because she couldnt follow the order, always claimed her car was broke down, or something.. so after he filed contempt on her she did not show for the contempt hearing 4 times in a row... this angered the Judge and he figured she was trying to hide their son from him and the courts so he then ordered dad to have full custody with mom not having any visitation until she went to court to file for them..

We would drive down to Blue Mountain Turnpike exit every two weeks (on Fridays) to meet up with her.. After exchanging custody like 2 or 3 times then she stopped coming down to bring him to his dad.. *at the turnpike exit there were cameras so it was easy to proove she was never showing up and also the time tickets from the turnpike would show the date and time we were there*

 

[jekyl007]

Sure. Just like divorces in OK normally take a month.

for one what does this have to do with this thread? for two I never said that they only take 30 days. it always depends on the circumstances and stuff

but how about you keep other posts on the threads they belong in

 

[lillithsmith]

No offense to anyone could we please keep my thread about what I am asking about. I have had my mom read to me word for word the custody order that Jekyl faxed and it is an order signed by a Judge. It does state in it that the parties are to meet at a Turnpike Exit every other Friday with each paying their own fees for transportation and turnpikes. S/he was also married and separated from their spouse like I am. I am very thankful for the responses. Very thankful that I at least know there is a chance no matter how big or small. Again thanks for everyone who responded and helped.

 

[frylover]

The agreement was that when he turned 4 it would go back to court *if they couldnt agree in mediation* to see who got their son for school year and stuff like that... but because she couldnt follow the order, always claimed her car was broke down, or something.. so after he filed contempt on her she did not show for the contempt hearing 4 times in a row... this angered the Judge and he figured she was trying to hide their son from him and the courts so he then ordered dad to have full custody with mom not having any visitation until she went to court to file for them..

We would drive down to Blue Mountain Turnpike exit every two weeks (on Fridays) to meet up with her.. After exchanging custody like 2 or 3 times then she stopped coming down to bring him to his dad.. *at the turnpike exit there were cameras so it was easy to proove she was never showing up and also the time tickets from the turnpike would show the date and time we were there*

And at the time this was ordered, did ANYONE (like, oh, I don't know....the PARENTS of this child who are supposed to care more about what's best for HIM than for themselves) consider how hard it would have been on this little boy, after FINALLY adjusting to this schedule, to go from seeing Mommy for two weeks and daddy for two weeks to suddenly have to change to seeing one of them MUCH less frequently?

 

[jekyl007]

And at the time this was ordered, did ANYONE (like, oh, I don't know....the PARENTS of this child who are supposed to care more about what's best for HIM than for themselves) consider how hard it would have been on this little boy, after FINALLY adjusting to this schedule, to go from seeing Mommy for two weeks and daddy for two weeks to suddenly have to change to seeing one of them MUCH less frequently?

Well that is something you should ask his mom. She is the one who didnt follow the order. The Judge is the one who took her 50/50 away and put in the new order that she had to file for her visitations back. He did great with the 2 week on 2 week off.. He was always so happy when we got him...

When she stopped showing up though I dont know why she did that. That was on her.. 2 years later and she still hasnt filed for her visitation back....We live in Oklahoma now.... She lives about 2 hours from the courthouse where jurisdiction is... (and yes the courts told us we could move)

 

[CurrentlyUndone]

Wow, what a rare coincidence. OP just so happens to be posting a very similar situation, involving similar counties where a previously discredited poster just so happens to have court orders and just so happens to have joined up on the same day PDP was discredited, and presents a wonderful opportunity for PDP to apparently redeem him/herself.

Must be a full moon or something.

 

[Isis1]

Wow, what a rare coincidence. OP just so happens to be posting a very similar situation, involving similar counties where a previously discredited poster just so happens to have court orders and just so happens to have joined up on the same day PDP was discredited, and presents a wonderful opportunity for PDP to apparently redeem him/herself.

Must be a full moon or something.

Phew!!! I thought I was the one going nutty!

 

[InfantCustody]

Married situations are often considered to be quite different - it is assumed that both parents HAVE spent time with the infant and that the infant is bonded with both.

Not so much in an unwed situation.

According to my attorney and the other attorney I consulted with...as long as the "unwed father" has had an introductory period of several months...they are being afforded virtually the same rights as married parents. While I don't disagree with an unmarried Father having rights as a married Father does...I believe the more concerning thing may be the lack of consideration for a child's developmental needs or relationship with both parents as they are now. I guess in 5 years we will all get to see if it really makes a difference for infants to have multiple overnights or not because it does seem to be happing more frequently.

OP: It is an unlikely order, but it could happen by some starry far away chance. I would prepare a very fair parenting plan that has you as primary and see if you can come to an agreement. As far as distance...My ex and I live an hour apart. The case in SC the parents lived an hour and a half apart. The general thought is these arrangements will last until school age and then a "primary parent" will be designated at that time. If it is not a true 50/50...the parent who had "primary" will usually remain primary. If it was a true 50/50 - no one can say.

I guess there really is no one size fits all answer...

 

[Proserpina]

According to my attorney and the other attorney I consulted with...as long as the "unwed father" has had an introductory period of several months...they are being afforded virtually the same rights as married parents.

From the get-go, a married father will be treated differently than an unwed father and as a rule won't have to jump through nearly as many hoops. That is what I was talking about.

After regular visitation of course an unwed father will be on more equal ground.

 

[frylover]

Wow, what a rare coincidence. OP just so happens to be posting a very similar situation, involving similar counties where a previously discredited poster just so happens to have court orders and just so happens to have joined up on the same day PDP was discredited, and presents a wonderful opportunity for PDP to apparently redeem him/herself.

Must be a full moon or something.

Whoa....good catch! Never even thought of that! You and Isis are good!

 

[jekyl007]

Wow, what a rare coincidence. OP just so happens to be posting a very similar situation, involving similar counties where a previously discredited poster just so happens to have court orders and just so happens to have joined up on the same day PDP was discredited, and presents a wonderful opportunity for PDP to apparently redeem him/herself.

Must be a full moon or something.

similar counties? I do not recall seeing OP state their county or anything else other than the state of PA.... I do not need to redeem myself for anyone or anything on this board, I am just giving honest actual occurence to someone of something that happened.... Anyone can try to discredit me all they want to cuz in the end the OP knows that I was telling the truth of what happened....

I swear you people will stop at nothing but to try to make someone out to be a liar any way you can in order to misguide people with false information.... I suppose I am also rockmommy also? since I told her as well that there was a chance of something no matter how slim?

seriously you people need to get over yourselves.. OMG wow OP signed up today.... man that must never happen....

OP, I am glad you recieved the fax and hope that atleast helped you a little bit in knowing that although there may not be a great chance of it but it can still happen.. 99% of the states are following the "childs best interest" route and going with what they think is best for the children..... As long as OP believes me that is all that matters...

This is the second person you guys have tried to persuade that I was wrong and lying and blah blah blah.. but the OP has a fax which prooves I wasnt lying so in the end it is OP who is going to be better off knowing that there is a chance no matter how small or big.. you guys keep grasping at straws to make people think I am lying about this or that and I will keep making sure I proove it everytime that when I say something it is because I have either 1. been through it or 2. had to do a lot of research on it....

 

[mistoffolees]

for one what does this have to do with this thread?

It has to do with this thread because you have a history of making wild statements that have no bearing on reality.

for two I never said that they only take 30 days. it always depends on the circumstances and stuff

You said that divorces in OK NORMALLY take 1 month - which is the exact wording I gave above.

It turns out that when backed into a corner, you admitted that they don't normally take a month and actually take several times that - even if uncontested. Perhaps the record shortest time is a month, but that's not 'normal'.

 

[LdiJ]

Whoa....good catch! Never even thought of that! You and Isis are good!

And without either one of them asking the other to turn on their private messages or posting anything on their profile page. Jekyl must have gotten that fax number via ESP.

 

[mistoffolees]

Wow, what a rare coincidence. OP just so happens to be posting a very similar situation, involving similar counties where a previously discredited poster just so happens to have court orders and just so happens to have joined up on the same day PDP was discredited, and presents a wonderful opportunity for PDP to apparently redeem him/herself.

AND, OP is apparently unable to read - just like Jekyl and Hyde. She writes: "I have had my mom read to me word for word the custody order that Jekyl faxed". I wonder why she couldn't read it herself?

Must be a full moon or something.

Is one of the planets still in retrograde?

 

[lillithsmith]

I apologize for even starting this thread. Now I am being accused of being someone else just because I posted about something that I am going through. Thank you for those who helped. I will make sure in the future that I do not come here to ask questions. I truly do appreciate those who helped me out in my situation.