Is joint legal custody for real?

[rmet4nzkx]

I'm not sure how many days before she has to respond, you might check with the court, it could be 10 working days or as little as 2 prior to the hearing, expect her to do it as late as possible or claim that she sent it to you so keep checking with the court to see if she has filed it there and if she has filed her proof of service.

Yes, at your next appointment with the new therapist, request that they request the records and sign the release. Hopefully they can get the records, but all the 1st therapist has to do is to release confirmation re the visits and a report even to another therapist. Frustrating but that is ok, because what ever they do can be argued against them from this point on, they will just dig the hole deeper. Because if the child was suicidal, there should be no question and documentation and consultation should both be in the record. The subpoena will include the entire record and will also be what the BBS will physically examin, so have patience.

Her games with the therapist and insurance will backfire on her. A long weekend, ahhhhhhhhhhh

 

[daddenied]

I'm not sure how many days before she has to respond, you might check with the court, it could be 10 working days or as little as 2 prior to the hearing, expect her to do it as late as possible or claim that she sent it to you so keep checking with the court to see if she has filed it there and if she has filed her proof of service.

I just saw this on the Notice of Motion that was served to my ex on Aug. 3rd, it states:

In the absence of an order shortening time, the original of the responsive declaration must be filed with the court and copy served on the other party at least nine court days before the hearing date. Add five calendar days if you serve by mail within California. (See Code of Civil Procedure 1005 for other situations.)

Does this mean that my ex has until the 5th to file her response with the court, and I should've been served a copy of her response at least 14 days in advance (which would've been yesterday or the day before?)? I checked the Fresno Case Records today and my ex has still not filed a response. What does this mean? If I don't get a response from her before the hearing, will she be held responsible or will her title of CP protect her? ???? Sorry, I find myself getting cynical lately. Should I ask her if she sent one or just wait?

 

[casa]

I just saw this on the Notice of Motion that was served to my ex on Aug. 3rd, it states:

In the absence of an order shortening time, the original of the responsive declaration must be filed with the court and copy served on the other party at least nine court days before the hearing date. Add five calendar days if you serve by mail within California. (See Code of Civil Procedure 1005 for other situations.)

Does this mean that my ex has until the 5th to file her response with the court, and I should've been served a copy of her response at least 14 days in advance (which would've been yesterday or the day before?)? I checked the Fresno Case Records today and my ex has still not filed a response. What does this mean? If I don't get a response from her before the hearing, will she be held responsible or will her title of CP protect her? ???? Sorry, I find myself getting cynical lately. Should I ask her if she sent one or just wait?

So unless there was no motion for order shortening time- she's passed her timeframe within which to file. However, my nuttX would lie and say he served me his responsive declarations- his attorney would even lie in court and state the same. It wasn't until I hired a Family Law Specialist that the 'service games' stopped.

Be 50% confident she has not responded (perhaps you'll win by default)...then be 50% confident she'll lie- say you were served and suceed in postponing this one more time.

Either way- Hang in there. Her rope is lengthening and soon she will hang herself.

 

[daddenied]

So unless there was no motion for order shortening time- she's passed her timeframe within which to file. However, my nuttX would lie and say he served me his responsive declarations- his attorney would even lie in court and state the same. It wasn't until I hired a Family Law Specialist that the 'service games' stopped.

Be 50% confident she has not responded (perhaps you'll win by default)...then be 50% confident she'll lie- say you were served and suceed in postponing this one more time.

Either way- Hang in there. Her rope is lengthening and soon she will hang herself.

Sadly, part of me already expects her to lie about serving me. It's happened in the past, although in the past she did have a response filed with the courts within the time frame, but I know she NEVER served a copy on me...I received a fax of it the day before that hearing. By the way, how exactly does winning by default occur? Is that when one party does not repond within a time frame? If by the 5th which happens to be Monday she does not actually file a response with the family court, does that mean she is in default? Or, will they give her until the 6th since the 5th is a holiday?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

I just saw this on the Notice of Motion that was served to my ex on Aug. 3rd, it states:

In the absence of an order shortening time, the original of the responsive declaration must be filed with the court and copy served on the other party at least nine court days before the hearing date. Add five calendar days if you serve by mail within California. (See Code of Civil Procedure 1005 for other situations.)

Does this mean that my ex has until the 5th to file her response with the court, and I should've been served a copy of her response at least 14 days in advance (which would've been yesterday or the day before?)? I checked the Fresno Case Records today and my ex has still not filed a response. What does this mean? If I don't get a response from her before the hearing, will she be held responsible or will her title of CP protect her? ???? Sorry, I find myself getting cynical lately. Should I ask her if she sent one or just wait?

No she should have already filed with you and the court keep watching the site, she may default, or she may show up and claim who knows what. You can serve her but she may just think that it's more communication from you and ignore it.

CALIFORNIA CODES
CODE OF CIVIL PROCEDURE
SECTION 1003-1008




1003. Every direction of a court or judge, made or entered in
writing, and not included in a judgment, is denominated an order. An
application for an order is a motion.



1004. Except as provided in section 166 of this code, motions must
be made in the court in which the action is pending.



1005. (a) Written notice shall be given, as prescribed in
subdivisions (b) and (c), for the following motions:
(1) Notice of Application and Hearing for Writ of Attachment under
Section 484.040.
(2) Notice of Application and Hearing for Claim and Delivery under
Section 512.030.
(3) Notice of Hearing for Claim of Exemption under Section
706.105.
(4) Motion to Quash Summons pursuant to subdivision (b) of Section
418.10.
(5) Motion for Determination of Good Faith Settlement pursuant to
Section 877.6.
(6) Hearing for Discovery of Peace Officer Personnel Records
pursuant to Section 1043 of the Evidence Code.
(7) Notice of Hearing of Third-Party Claim pursuant to Section
720.320.
(8) Motion for an Order to Attend Deposition more than 150 miles
from deponent's residence pursuant to paragraph (3) of subdivision
(e) of Section 2025.
(9) Notice of Hearing of Application for Relief pursuant to
Section 946.6 of the Government Code.
(10) Motion to Set Aside Default or Default Judgment and for Leave
to Defend Actions pursuant to Section 473.5.
(11) Motion to Expunge Notice of Pendency of Action pursuant to
Section 405.30.
(12) Motion to Set Aside Default and for Leave to Amend pursuant
to Section 585.5.
(13) Any other proceeding under this code in which notice is
required and no other time or method is prescribed by law or by court
or judge.
(b) Unless otherwise ordered or specifically provided by law, all
moving and supporting papers shall be served and filed at least 16
court days before the hearing. The moving and supporting papers
served shall be a copy of the papers filed or to be filed with the
court. However, if the notice is served by mail, the required 16-day
period of notice before the hearing shall be increased by five
calendar days if the place of mailing and the place of address are
within the State of California, 10 calendar days if either the place
of mailing or the place of address is outside the State of California
but within the United States, and 20 calendar days if either the
place of mailing or the place of address is outside the United
States, and if the notice is served by facsimile transmission,
express mail, or another method of delivery providing for overnight
delivery, the required 16-day period of notice before the hearing
shall be increased by two calendar days. Section 1013, which extends
the time within which a right may be exercised or an act may be done,
does not apply to a notice of motion, papers opposing a motion, or
reply papers governed by this section. All papers opposing a motion
so noticed shall be filed with the court and a copy served on each
party at least nine court days, and all reply papers at least five
court days before the hearing.
The court, or a judge thereof, may prescribe a shorter time.
(c) Notwithstanding any other provision of this section, all
papers opposing a motion and all reply papers shall be served by
personal delivery, facsimile transmission, express mail, or other
means consistent with Sections 1010, 1011, 1012, and 1013, and
reasonably calculated to ensure delivery to the other party or
parties not later than the close of the next business day after the
time the opposing papers or reply papers, as applicable, are filed.
This subdivision applies to the service of opposition and reply
papers regarding motions for summary judgment or summary
adjudication, in addition to the motions listed in subdivision (a).
The court, or a judge thereof, may prescribe a shorter time.



1005.5. A motion upon all the grounds stated in the written notice
thereof is deemed to have been made and to be pending before the
court for all purposes, upon the due service and filing of the notice
of motion, but this shall not deprive a party of a hearing of the
motion to which he is otherwise entitled. Procedure upon a motion
for new trial shall be as otherwise provided.



1006. When a notice of motion is given, or an order to show cause
is made returnable before a judge out of court, and at the time fixed
for the motion, or on the return day of the order, the judge is
unable to hear the parties, the matter may be transferred by his
order to some other judge, before whom it might originally have been
brought.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Sadly, part of me already expects her to lie about serving me. It's happened in the past, although in the past she did have a response filed with the courts within the time frame, but I know she NEVER served a copy on me...I received a fax of it the day before that hearing. By the way, how exactly does winning by default occur? Is that when one party does not repond within a time frame? If by the 5th which happens to be Monday she does not actually file a response with the family court, does that mean she is in default? Or, will they give her until the 6th since the 5th is a holiday?

9 court days doesn't include weekends or holidays, she is already late filing with the court no matter what she says about serving you, it could be sitting in the court house and might show up on Tuesday, keep your fingers crossed that it doesn't and think default, default........

 

[daddenied]

9 court days doesn't include weekends or holidays, she is already late filing with the court no matter what she says about serving you, it could be sitting in the court house and might show up on Tuesday, keep your fingers crossed that it doesn't and think default, default........

Thank you...I will. I am driving back to Fresno tomorrow to see the therapist and take care of some things. Next week I don't have an appt, but depending on the court's decision, which I'm praying is on my side I will see my children in therapeutic supervised visitation on Sat. the 17th. We actually plan on driving up to Fresno Tuesday night then going to the hearing on Wed. the 14th. I am asking their teachers if I can come to school on Thursday and Friday the 15th and 16th to meet with them and also check on my children's progress since I live too far to attend parent night and orientation then we plan on seeing one of my son's football games that friday night the 16th then I get to see them the next day for visitation. I can't wait to see them! Have a wonderful Labor Day weekend!

 

[casa]

No she should have already filed with you and the court keep watching the site, she may default, or she may show up and claim who knows what. You can serve her but she may just think that it's more communication from you and ignore it.

CALIFORNIA CODES
CODE OF CIVIL PROCEDURE
SECTION 1003-1008




1003. Every direction of a court or judge, made or entered in
writing, and not included in a judgment, is denominated an order. An
application for an order is a motion.



1004. Except as provided in section 166 of this code, motions must
be made in the court in which the action is pending.



1005. (a) Written notice shall be given, as prescribed in
subdivisions (b) and (c), for the following motions:
(1) Notice of Application and Hearing for Writ of Attachment under
Section 484.040.
(2) Notice of Application and Hearing for Claim and Delivery under
Section 512.030.
(3) Notice of Hearing for Claim of Exemption under Section
706.105.
(4) Motion to Quash Summons pursuant to subdivision (b) of Section
418.10.
(5) Motion for Determination of Good Faith Settlement pursuant to
Section 877.6.
(6) Hearing for Discovery of Peace Officer Personnel Records
pursuant to Section 1043 of the Evidence Code.
(7) Notice of Hearing of Third-Party Claim pursuant to Section
720.320.
(8) Motion for an Order to Attend Deposition more than 150 miles
from deponent's residence pursuant to paragraph (3) of subdivision
(e) of Section 2025.
(9) Notice of Hearing of Application for Relief pursuant to
Section 946.6 of the Government Code.
(10) Motion to Set Aside Default or Default Judgment and for Leave
to Defend Actions pursuant to Section 473.5.
(11) Motion to Expunge Notice of Pendency of Action pursuant to
Section 405.30.
(12) Motion to Set Aside Default and for Leave to Amend pursuant
to Section 585.5.
(13) Any other proceeding under this code in which notice is
required and no other time or method is prescribed by law or by court
or judge.
(b) Unless otherwise ordered or specifically provided by law, all
moving and supporting papers shall be served and filed at least 16
court days before the hearing. The moving and supporting papers
served shall be a copy of the papers filed or to be filed with the
court. However, if the notice is served by mail, the required 16-day
period of notice before the hearing shall be increased by five
calendar days if the place of mailing and the place of address are
within the State of California, 10 calendar days if either the place
of mailing or the place of address is outside the State of California
but within the United States, and 20 calendar days if either the
place of mailing or the place of address is outside the United
States, and if the notice is served by facsimile transmission,
express mail, or another method of delivery providing for overnight
delivery, the required 16-day period of notice before the hearing
shall be increased by two calendar days. Section 1013, which extends
the time within which a right may be exercised or an act may be done,
does not apply to a notice of motion, papers opposing a motion, or
reply papers governed by this section. All papers opposing a motion
so noticed shall be filed with the court and a copy served on each
party at least nine court days, and all reply papers at least five
court days before the hearing.
The court, or a judge thereof, may prescribe a shorter time.
(c) Notwithstanding any other provision of this section, all
papers opposing a motion and all reply papers shall be served by
personal delivery, facsimile transmission, express mail, or other
means consistent with Sections 1010, 1011, 1012, and 1013, and
reasonably calculated to ensure delivery to the other party or
parties not later than the close of the next business day after the
time the opposing papers or reply papers, as applicable, are filed.
This subdivision applies to the service of opposition and reply
papers regarding motions for summary judgment or summary
adjudication, in addition to the motions listed in subdivision (a).
The court, or a judge thereof, may prescribe a shorter time.



1005.5. A motion upon all the grounds stated in the written notice
thereof is deemed to have been made and to be pending before the
court for all purposes, upon the due service and filing of the notice
of motion, but this shall not deprive a party of a hearing of the
motion to which he is otherwise entitled. Procedure upon a motion
for new trial shall be as otherwise provided.



1006. When a notice of motion is given, or an order to show cause
is made returnable before a judge out of court, and at the time fixed
for the motion, or on the return day of the order, the judge is
unable to hear the parties, the matter may be transferred by his
order to some other judge, before whom it might originally have been
brought.

If she 'avoids' (denies) service...then that will be noted by the court and you can pay a sheriff to serve her (not as costly as one would think) as long as you know an address/time of her home residence or work.

She will not get away with it for long- because if she cannot be served for a long period of time...she's in a whole 'nother big quagmire.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Thank you...I will. I am driving back to Fresno tomorrow to see the therapist and take care of some things. Next week I don't have an appt, but depending on the court's decision, which I'm praying is on my side I will see my children in therapeutic supervised visitation on Sat. the 17th. We actually plan on driving up to Fresno Tuesday night then going to the hearing on Wed. the 14th. I am asking their teachers if I can come to school on Thursday and Friday the 15th and 16th to meet with them and also check on my children's progress since I live too far to attend parent night and orientation then we plan on seeing one of my son's football games that friday night the 16th then I get to see them the next day for visitation. I can't wait to see them! Have a wonderful Labor Day weekend!

Sounds like a plan. Be sure to fill out the waiver and request for records even if you have to wait until after the court date, but since she hasn't responded most likely your request will be granted, that doesn't mean that she will bring them to therapy, you may have to add that to the contempt charges. DO you have a court date for the contempt motions yet?
Be sure to make appointments with the teachers.

 

[daddenied]

Sounds like a plan. Be sure to fill out the waiver and request for records even if you have to wait until after the court date, but since she hasn't responded most likely your request will be granted, that doesn't mean that she will bring them to therapy, you may have to add that to the contempt charges. DO you have a court date for the contempt motions yet?
Be sure to make appointments with the teachers.

Not yet..if I don't get it in Tuesdays mail I will contact the paralegal who is out until then. I'm glad that part is done for now. And yes...I do realize that in the event my request is granted, I shouldn't hold my breath that my ex WILL bring them. I have already contacted the school earlier this week and will wait until next Wed. to contact them again if I don't hear from them. I don't want to bombard them at the beginning of the school year and at Labor Day weekend time. Plus, I'm sure my name is not one of their favorite parent names with all that has happened. But, who knows...I am still looking forward to meeting with them in order to be a part of my children's lives. My finances are so horrible right now as I have decided that some debts will just have to be put aside until my fight is over. I cringe at the thought of the negative ramifications that will follow. The basketball coach called me today (my 2nd child's coach) and left me a message to call and discuss all that's been going on with my situation. I was happy to hear from him.

 

[daddenied]

clarification

If she 'avoids' (denies) service...then that will be noted by the court and you can pay a sheriff to serve her (not as costly as one would think) as long as you know an address/time of her home residence or work.

She will not get away with it for long- because if she cannot be served for a long period of time...she's in a whole 'nother big quagmire.

Okay, before I get started with my busy weekend, I just saw this message and wanted some clarification. IF I find out on Tuesday that my ex has in fact NOT filed a response nor filed a proof of service that I was served with a response, am I supposed to do anything more? Or, do I just show up at the hearing on Sept. 14th and hope I do win by default? Just wondering.

In reference to the contempt motion, when I find out from the paralegal when the contempt hearing is set for and get a copy of the filed paperwork, I plan on having a sheriff serve her at her place of employment since she is there Mon-Fri. I was told it was not as costly as I would think too from another person, but I just want to be sure it is done and she does not avoid it or refuse it. The paralegal told me she would serve her in the mail from Fresno too, but I think I'd rather a sheriff do it if I can afford it. Thank you all again. Good night for good this time...I'll update you after the holiday weekend.

 

[daddenied]

Hey everyone. Just my luck, I thought. Tonight I checked the Fresno on line case information and saw that my ex filed her response with the court on Sept. 2nd and filed her proof of service to me stating she had me served through the mail on Aug. 31st. I have yet to receive it though. ???? I was thinking of what you said about court days not including weekends and holidays and looked it up and saw that only calendar days counted EVERY day. So, although my ex filed her response on Sept. 2nd and a proof of service that she supposedly served me on Aug. 31st, wouldn't that still be a response filed AFTER the required time frame? I know...I feel pathetically embarrassed for even asking, but technically she IS late right?

Again, the required response filing dates is indicated in the California Code as well as on the motion that she was served with stating:

In the absence of an order shortening time, the original of the responsive declaration must be filed with the court and copy served on the other party at least nine court days before the hearing date. Add five calendar days if you serve by mail within California.

When I count the 9 court days from Sept. 14th, it ends up being Wed. 8/31 and since we live in CA and have to add 5 more calendar days, it would actually be Fri. 8/26. Am I right? And, if I am, is she in default or will the court ignore her missing the deadline because she got it in on 9/2? I'm anxious to know and don't really want to wait until the hearing. Please tell me what this means, if anything, or if I am just not that fortunate.

I know this is not a forum to vent about anything else, but custody and visitation, but this entire court ordeal has taken it's toll on my relationship with my girlfriend who has been by me every step of the way, supporting me by taking the role of a paralegal and assistant and ensuring I don't miss any deadlines and that all paperwork is done as best as she can, has helped me financially and almost drained of her finances in helping me in this fight...(since July 9th I've had to drive to Fresno every Sat. except for 2 and the price of gas plus the co-pay for the therapist has us averaging $110 every weekend to do this)...just everything and with my own depression of not seeing my kids and all the other stresses that this case brings, we got into an ugly argument and I can't sleep right now. If anyone out there has gone through anything similar and your case came out halfway decent and fair, please share your story with me and help me see that there is an end to all of this madness.

Miss Met and Casa...thanks again for everything.

Oh, by the way, when I file a motion with the court, then later (like in my contempt motion) get other relevant information, am I required to file it in addition to my declarations and serve it on my ex? If so, how long in advance of the hearing? If not, would I be able to just bring any documents, or proof to the scheduled hearing? Just wondering.

 

[daddenied]

Dentist office ignoring me...who can I turn to?

I don't mean to be a pest, but I had a minute in between classes and wanted to ask your input. I have written, faxed and called the dentist and ortho offices that have provided service to my children. The dentist office is the office that my ex had put my name on the bill but her mailing address just to refresh your memory. I contacted the post office who had me put in change of address forms with them as well as directed me to my post office to fill out the fraud paperwork. The police department said that a police report cannot be filed for this as the complaint and fraud report must be done with the post office. So, that is in motion. I am upset, because neither of these offices have acknowledged nor responded to any of my letters, which have been at least 2 weeks apart from each other (so I don't feel is harrassment). BUT...what they have done is contact my ex about my writing them producing this stupid email from her...

"I’ll try to have the exact figures of the 2nd orthodontic consultations to you by tomorrow. Suffice it to say, there wasn’t much of a price difference between the two orthodontists. Their estimates for treatment were within $20 of each other. The only difference between the two offices is that the 2nd ortho is willing to take a smaller down payment upfront but the monthly payments are higher.

I also wanted to say, “Bravo!” Your persistence has finally paid off. Your insatiable letter writing campaign has yielded results. Previously, there were no outstanding balances on any of the children’s medical or dental accounts. I had paid the required co-payments, you never received any billing, and no balance was due. Any reasonable person would be pleased with the arrangement and know to leave well enough alone.

Not you.

The effect of your barrage of letters has resulted in the insurance companies disputing previous (paid) claims. (Dentist's name) office called to notify me that your incessant inquiries have resulted in an unprecedented REVERSAL of insurance payments. The amount currently due (Dentist name) is now $250. Either remit your payment or begin another barrage of letters to your insurance company. Either way, please notify me once you’ve rectified the resultant situation you have created.

I have done well dealing with frustrations and all of this woman's crap, but this haughty letter infuriates me! I don't know if you recall, but the dentist office sent me a ledger showing that there was a balance of approximately $60 plus an additional $66 finance charges I supposedly owe. This is when I found out the bills for all these months were in my name sent to my ex's addresses. I immediately contacted the dentist office telling them I was NOT going to pay finance charges and that if the $60 was the balance it would be shared equally between my ex and myself. I also told them I would contact my insurance company who had not paid on the claims...I did this and my insurance company then cut checks on 8/25/05. It was noted that the amount my insurance co paid was several hundreds of dollars more than what was owed. My insurance company says the dentist overbilled us for the services provided. NOW I get this crap from my ex telling me the dentist office called HER instead of ME saying due to the dispute we now owe $250 and she wants me to cut payment to them. PLEASE help me not to lose my mind over this madness. WHO can I complain to about the dentist and ortho (who has a whole separate story too long for this post) and their completely ignoring my letters and inquiries!? PLEASE help me understand if I can get help from whoever governs these medical providers or if I am just screwed. (Excuse me.)

 

[rmet4nzkx]

If she supposedly mailed the response to you on 8-31-5 and you have not received it, then call the paralegal and ask them to get copies of her filing, and to inform the clerk that you were NOT served, there may or not be a charge for the copies.

She is playing games, by changing your address so you won't know what is happening and now complaining because you are trying to get to the bottom of it, it will become more evidence. This is the price she pays because of her deceit.

I know how frustrating it all is, but I had to laugh when reading her excuse. The fruad will catch up to her and after a certain point, it will go to grand theft.

Be extra kind and loivng to your girlfriend and tell her how much you appreciate her, remember some of what is happening is happening because of your relationship.

How did the weekend go?

 

[daddenied]

Her response got to me today. I’m surprised, because she has lied in the past and many times I have gone unserved, but because she filed a proof of service (even without proof of mailing) she always got away with it. Just my luck. I did call the paralegal and in our phone tagging and messages left, the paralegal said it was filed with the courts on 9/2/05 showing a supposed mailing/service date of 8/31/05. And, she said that my ex still missed the deadline. It should’ve been filed and served no later than 8/27/05. Since I just received the response in today, will they still consider her late? I figure asking won’t hurt. I don’t have her reply right now in front of me, and I will post it tonight, but she basically states that the CO says SHE can choose and she chooses the agency who cannot accommodate Sat. therapy sessions. She states that if I can go to school and have that worked into my week’s schedule than I can work week day therapy sessions in Fresno into my week schedule. Can you believe this!? I can’t! And, then again, I feel stupid…I SHOULD believe this! She also goes on to say that if the courts choose to accommodate the Sat. request that was already granted me in the CO from 7/1 then she is asking that they order a female therapist due to past experiences ??? and how our children feel more comfortable with female authority figures. This is what I get from her reply. Oh, also she says that the therapist I chose does not comply with some law stating that the therapist is supposed to meet separately with each parent and have an interview or assessment, etc.. ??? and that she called him several times but he refuses to speak to her. She actually was harassing him and I told her to stop. I told her when she brought the kids to the first session she could meet with him and speak to him then, Of course, she refuses. So, has done some sort of research showing the courts some law he has now broken and she does not want to work with his agency now.

Anyway, things are ok with my girlfriend and I. The weekend was not a good one, but we were able to talk everything out and make goals for ourselves in how we will deal with everything going on. I will try to be extra kind to her as you suggested Miss Met. She’s just drained…in ALL aspects, especially financially.