Mental Health Evaluation

[casa]

Why did I stay with her for 12 years? Back in the "good ole days", there were bad marriages but couples stayed together "until death do us part" and they did because they weren't thinking of themselves. They were thinking of their kids! THAT'S why I stayed for 12 years. ALL children NEED a mother and a father! Statistics show that in single family homes children are prone to all kinds of negative social behavior.

This is absolutely false. People believe it, but it doesn't make it true.

Statistics show that children are better off with a single parent in an emotionally healthy environment~ Than they are being raised by both parents when there is dysfunction.

 

[capman44]

Please let us know how it was possible that she prematurely induced her own labor....that would be difficult to do.




That's really not all that unreasonable. Our school system considers 10 days to be acceptable.



Dude, you can't use that....you, yourself "got her out of it". If you now try to claim its true...then YOU can get in trouble for child neglect.




If the doctor believed that some was wrong....the doctor would have reported her to CPS.





Pointing out the holes in your case is hardly an indication of someone having an issue with all men.....

You are so naive! You REALLY think doctors are that concerned? They just listen to what the parent tells them.

And it's VERY easy to induce labor on ones self. Any woman knows that.

And if all you can do is think about how to "point out holes in my case", without, MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, entertaining the idea that I'm telling you the truth THEN you REALLY do have a serious issue with ALL men!

 

[stealth2]

And you seem to have an issue with anyone pointing out the problems in your case. So I'd suggest that you go to court with what you have. Maybe the judge won't notice the flaws in your arguments.

 

[capman44]

Well, for starters you could have thought about preventing three more pregnancies..... But, you didn't.

Nor were you concerned enough when CPS entered the picture to help your kids, but instead "got her out of it" through some rather extensive efforts on your part - at roughly the same time that you were separating. I'm sorry, but that DOES seem odd to me. If you were separating because of her issues, why on earth would you do somethign to make it easier for her to keep the kids in a situation you see as neglectful? It just doesn't make sense.

You must have a perfect life. No mistakes or errors. You're just perfect! AAAAHHHHH! Good for you!

Very Simple! I still love her! ALL I WANT IS FOR HER TO GET HELP!!!!!!!!

 

[stealth2]

Well, expect that to bite you in the butt - hard.

 

[capman44]

I don't think you're getting the point. If the judge doesn't, your hands are tied until you can prove ongoing neglect. Which means your kids will be living in a poor environment until you can do that. But hey, your choice.

You do have a lawyer, right?

Maybe I'm not getting your point. I'm aware it's in the hands of the Judge. I've been gathering doctors records. In 2 years time, my 4 kids have been to 4 different doctors 108 times! That's 11.25 per child, per month! Is that "Normal"! I have documentation.

 

[stealth2]

What you don't seem to understand is that 2 years ago, you apparently went to great lengths to prove to authorities that she is NOT mentally ill or unfit. You've known for 12 years (according to you) that she's unstable, but you blithely went along making four babies with her. NOW that it's to your benefit, you want to say "yeah, she's unfit and mentally ill." It doesn't work that way, dude.

Long and short - you need a lawyer. Period.

 

[capman44]

If you file for evaluations, she could very well get supervised visitation until the outcome is known. If you are claiming mental illness that is harmful to the children it could be supervised visits. Do you really want to put her and the children through this? I haven't read anything that is harmful to the children. If she is depressed, she may need some anti-depressants, but heck, her life has kinda fallen apart, as has yours recently with the death of your parents. I would try to be more understanding and take a step back from the allegations. The judges really kinda frown on unsubstantiated attacks and you could end up being the loser here. It is a lot of money out of pocket and in the end you both just may end up on antidepressants. But it would be hard to move forward from an attack like that - difficult to co-parent when one parent is looking for reasons to make you look horrible to the judge.

Has she ever been faced with a family member or friend with a terminal illness? My son had cancer and I take both of my children to the dr way too much. He is perfectly healthy now, but every little thing makes me worry, it doesn't make me a bad parent though...the sniffles and I rush to the pediatrician, a fever and I'm rushing my son back to his oncologist.

It just seems to me that with the two of you living only a half block from each other that perhaps you could use positive reasons why you want a change? The judge would look on a parenting plan that would probably be very much so 50/50 since you live so close....or is that not what you are wanting?

Thank you for at least trying to understand. I agree with you about positive efforts. BUT there is a new problem that has arisen. We were going to use mediators. (Much cheaper and a Judge would never have to hear the negative facts). Since we live only 1/2 block from each other, I offered her SOLE physical custody and asked only for JOINT LEGAL custody. That way she couldn't take the kids to a doctor unless I agreed. She REFUSED!

What can I to do? She's forcing me to go to a Judge.

 

[stealth2]

Actually, you're not completely correct on that. As the pri**** caregiver, she will be more than able to take the children for routine medical care - that includes if they're ill. What she'd need your consent for is any major procedures. But she's not going to have to get your consent to take the kids to a doctor for a fever, or a rash or the flu.

 

[capman44]

In your initial post you said that you want FULL custody, that contradicts what you are saying now.

Also she can request you get counseling but a judge ultimately determines custody and visitation and is the only one who can order you to get counseling as a stipulation to visitation.

OK, yes. To start with I wanted to TRY for full custody. But after speaking to friends and lawyers, researching the net and hearing other peoples stories I've changed my mind. It would be almost impossible for me to get FULL custody. I know she can request that I get counseling and IF a Judge sees a reason for me to do so I will.

 

[capman44]

Why usahol, how right you are!



Georgie-porgie did post that, didn't he..... So, George - which is it? And I'll ask again - DO YOU HAVE A LAWYER?

I don't know why I'm responding to you when you feel the need to be snide with this Georgie-porgie crap but I will.

NO, I DON'T HAVE A LAWYER! As I said, we were going to use mediators but now she's changed her mind. So**************...I guess I will have a lawyer!

 

[capman44]

Actually, you're not completely correct on that. As the pri**** caregiver, she will be more than able to take the children for routine medical care - that includes if they're ill. What she'd need your consent for is any major procedures. But she's not going to have to get your consent to take the kids to a doctor for a fever, or a rash or the flu.

Maybe in your state but not here!

 

[Susan MacLove]

Maybe I'm not getting your point. I'm aware it's in the hands of the Judge. I've been gathering doctors records. In 2 years time, my 4 kids have been to 4 different doctors 108 times! That's 11.25 per child, per month! Is that "Normal"! I have documentation.

Please check your math:

2 years=24 months 108/24=4.5 total visits per month

4.5/4 kids= 1.125 visits per child per month.

You go in there screaming 11 visits per child per month and someone knows how to use a calc. you are going to look pretty foolish.

 

[casa]

Maybe in your state but not here!

Stealth is correct~ Joint legal means joint decision making re; major medical/educational/legal decisions...It does not mean you both must consent to 'routine' medical care. ie; When the kids are with you and are sick- you can take them to the Dr., and when they are with her- she can take them to the Dr. Most states have verbiage as to notifying the other parent "Within a reasonable amount of time".

That is actually to protect the child~ So that an illness or injury doesn't worsen while 2 parents fight over whether or not it's worthy of a Dr. visit.

Also, as previous poster stated- The calculations were a bit off.

Have you considered asking the court to appoint a GAL to represent the Best Interest of the children? Then a 3rd/Nuetral party to investigate both homes and situations to provide the court with some insight into the actual living conditions in both homes. IMO, if I had to choose between paying an attorney for just myself...(when the welfare of the children is the pri**** issue)...and a GAL, I'd choose a GAL.

If you have time, have you perused the site: www.deltabravo.net ? It has many reference articles, resources and information re; child custody, evaluations etc.

 

[stealth2]

Please check your math:

2 years=24 months 108/24=4.5 total visits per month

4.5/4 kids= 1.125 visits per child per month.

You go in there screaming 11 visits per child per month and someone knows how to use a calc. you are going to look pretty foolish.

Snort. Like I told him - he should just take what he's got and present it to the court. So he looks like an idiot if he's not interested in getting real input.